Men are confusing creatures, even to other men. We do weird things, act tough for no reason, and often fear emotion. Why? Who knows.
Rancerle asked men of Reddit: What about men confuses you?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
10. We don't get it either.
Everything. I don't know how I got this far.
Same. I was raised by a single mother. I don't understand just about everything guys do as a group and I get super uncomfortable around more than one or two of them anyway
Ten percent luck
Twenty percent skill
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
Five percent pleasure
Fifty percent bluffing my a-- off and having no one call me on it
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name.
9. Because men aren't supposed to feel.
Why is so hard to make friends as adults? It was so easy when I was a kid, even as a teenager, but now everybody want to either sell me something or making me work for free, like, everyone I meet just want to talk business, usually bad business.
I can make female friends, but not male friends, WTF?
This speaks to me. I have lots of female friends and can regularly get them to hang out but making commitments with guy friends is impossible. Then I'll meet a cool guy and try to find a time to hang out and... nothing.
Women generally tend to be interested in people. It amazes me how little dudes generally talk about each other's lives. You're conditioned to shun emotion.
8. Toxic masculinity is ruining the world.
I'm always confused by men who want to start fights and are constantly aggressive. I'm a Marine, so I know what it feels like to be amped up on adrenaline and what it's like to fight. All that means the last thing I ever want to do when I'm out at a bar is get into a fight, let along start one over something stupid. There have certainly been a couple times when I've had to calm myself down, but everyone has those experiences. I just hate hothead macho men with nothing better to do than look for opportunities to be outraged by something. It's like dogs who think they see someone they don't know in front of their house.
7. "Whoa.=, I wish I was that cool." - Nobody
Loud mufflers. They don't make your Honda sound like a Ferrari. They make it sound like a broken Honda.
One of my friends the other day was super confused as to why people don't like loud mufflers.
I can't imagine any situation where I'd have my conversation interrupted by loud rumbling and not be pissed off
You mean people don't like being woken up in the morning or dead of night by some twats belting up and down the motorway in their sh!tmobiles?
I wish it were legal to jam the exhausts up.
6. F*ck off, the mood.
Why do they always want to fight after any sort of conflict—I yelled "nice" at this guy who cut in front of traffic and he rolled down his window and yelled "let's f*ckin fight bro come on."
Last year I was letting my dog out, my neighbors have a bonfire going. I ask over the fence "making smores?" And the guy just looks at me and yells "GO F*CK YOURSELF" and stares me down. Seems a reasonable reaction.
Probably just didn't want to share his smores the greedy bastard
5. "cAuSe It'S gAy..."
The men that are scared to hang out 1 on 1 because someone might think we're on a date. It's real, look it up.
Funny you say that. A good friend of mine and I grab food every few months. We went to a restaurant (ok, it was Olive Garden) and the hostess tried seating us next to one another, side by side.
She blushed when I elected to sit across the table. Can't two dudes enjoy a night at Olive Garden when they want without everyone thinking it's a date??
Homophobia runs so f*cking deep it's not even funny. I'll never understand why people are afraid of people they have never met thinking they're gay. Or just people in general thinking that, literally who cares.
4. Mind the gap.
When I'm standing at a urinal peeing and a guy comes up to use the one right next to me and there are clearly open urinals further down the row. Why do this? Don't you know you're breaking men's restroom etiquette?
A guy at my work not only does this, but will start talking. F*ck off bud, some of us are pee shy!
As for people who try to talk while they're sat on the toilet, there is nobody on the planet I want to talk to while something is halfway out of their butthole.
3. Narrator: it isn't.
You really think the way to a girls heart is by sending her a picture of your penis?
Oddly, quite effective on Grindr though.
2. Lift the seat.
Why do you pee all over the seat and not clean it? I get when you have to go badly and no time to lift the seat. But you have to know you made a mess and I'm sure when you walk into a piss covered stall you also get pissed.
Especially when they do it in their own house. Over at a friend's house and there's piss splattered on the floor or wall around the toilet. Dude, if you can't get it all in the pot, just sit down. It's your own house. You're pissing all over your own house. I don't get it.
1. Guys, chill.
I'm not hitting on your damn gf I'm just trying to see if our answers for the homework are the same.
I was talking to a girl about a project we had to do For a graduate class and I was asking her for help with one specific part of it. While I was messaging her through Facebook, I got another message from her boyfriend that said, "Stop messaging my girlfriend and worry about yourself."
He was a cop who had graduated from college like a year before. I said to her, "uh I think your boyfriend just messaged me." I sent her the screen cap of his message and she apologized for him, and I'm assuming she talked to him. Every time I saw him he'd give me the stink eye or something. They eventually got married. I hope that's going well.
Macaulay Culkin Is Having Fans Vote On What He Should Legally Change His Name To—And The Options Are Bizarre 😮
Have you ever wanted to help your favorite celebrity reach their potential by giving them a new name? Fans of Macaulay Culkin will be able to do just that, as he's allowing them to vote and pick his new middle name.
The choices are beyond strange.
Thanks for having me @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight !!! I'll let you know how the name change works out! https://t.co/iIkTC8OyXH— Macaulay Culkin (@Macaulay Culkin) 1543452222.0
In a segment on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, Culkin announced his desire to change his middle name to something else. He allowed people to submit names for the last month, and narrowed those down to the top five.
Some of the suggestions were interesting, to say the least.
@DevonESawa Weird. I'm about to change my middle name. Any good suggestion? Go to https://t.co/BYXGIWJK3g— Macaulay Culkin (@Macaulay Culkin) 1540529059.0
@IncredibleCulk @FallonTonight @jimmyfallon It should be "Culkin, Macaulay" as a middle name. Will be read as: Mac… https://t.co/xRo5AiR8jd— carmineenimrac (@carmineenimrac) 1543469371.0
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight How did you miss "Macaulay Skulking Culkin"?!— Caleb DAVIS (@Caleb DAVIS) 1543487990.0
@ComicBook @IncredibleCulk Pls add Cacaulay Mulkin as an option— Matt Michler 🌹 (@Matt Michler 🌹) 1543603411.0
@ComicBook @IncredibleCulk Kevin! Obviously.— Andrew 🐼 🐝 (@Andrew 🐼 🐝) 1543603516.0
The official choices: Shark Week, The McRib Is Back, Kieran (submitted by his famous younger brother), Macaulay Culkin, and Publicity Stunt. That last one was suggested by Culkin's girlfriend, actress Brenda Song, and gives away the game.
Fans are still excited to vote for his new name.
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight Macaulay “Shark Week” Culkin has a nice ring to it.🐰 Vote on… https://t.co/AS5ce275jl— Shark Week (@Shark Week) 1543526453.0
The moment of joy that hopefully comes to us all during the day just transpired for me and funny enough, it took le… https://t.co/stOVPePmpy— Sia Brooks (@Sia Brooks) 1543606608.0
Macaulay Culkin Needs A New Middle Name https://t.co/HO9ZMUM1O1 via @bunnyearsweb @IncredibleCulk I voted for "Kier… https://t.co/jnVAa6NTlp— Stetson (@Stetson) 1543815411.0
I voted for @IncredibleCulk new middle name, what did you do today?— Catalina F 🇨🇱 (@Catalina F 🇨🇱) 1543801274.0
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight I like Keiran— Melissa (@Melissa) 1543517677.0
McAuley Culkin is allowing fans to vote on what is legal middle name should be, two of the final 5 is “Macauley Cul… https://t.co/KUPTU0HnKR— YOUAREDEAD (@YOUAREDEAD) 1543620499.0
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight Just for you to know, I voted Macaulay Culkin!— 🍀 Maria (@🍀 Maria) 1543495868.0
This is all a publicity stunt to drive traffic to Culkin's website, Bunny Ears, launched earlier this year in March. The site bills itself as a lifestyle and holistic health brand, similar to Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop. However, the articles are jokes or satirical.
Good luck finding the site if you tried to go there right after the Fallon segment.
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon Look at the bunny ears website now after @jimmyfallon voted on @IncredibleCulk middle… https://t.co/PFAwxsRB8E— Charles John Kelly (@Charles John Kelly) 1543485190.0
With articles like "A Tour Guide Of The Places Where Men Have Dumped Me" in their 'Travel Guides' section, or "Meditative Things White People Can Do While Black People Attempt To Explain White Privilege" under 'Spiritual Wellness,' it's difficult to imagine the site is wanting for traffic.
Time will tell what Culkin's new middle name will be, but as of this writing, it's looking like he'll be known as Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin. Which is a shame, because Macaulay Shark Week Culkin had such a nice ring to it.
H/T: Huffington Post, Bunny Ears
White Supremacists Used App To Trick Brett Favre And Soulja Boy Into Recording Messages Supporting Anti-Semitism
White supremacists are truly a scourge. Every time they think you can't go lower, they find a new way to burrow underground and prove you completely wrong, as they did when they targeted two celebrities over the internet and tricked them into spewing garbage.
Brett Favre, star football player, and Soulja Boy, recording artists, were approached by a group claiming to be "a U.S. veterans organization for Cameo, a company that enables consumers to book personalized video greetings from celebrities."
Favre recorded the message, assuming the "request stemmed from [his] interest in veterans affairs" and recorded the message, a service that the perpetrators paid $500+ to complete.
Later on, Favre found his request was appropriated for the agenda of an anti-Semitic hate group.
"I was distressed to learn that the request came from an anti-Semitic group that reposted my video with comments implying that I endorsed their mission. Nothing could be further from the truth. I am therefore donating my $500 Cameo fee to Charities supporting their fight against hate and bigotry."
I'm on Cameo & kinda jealous they didn't request me. Maybe I need to lower my price? Most importantly Brett Favre d… https://t.co/8hsC292nRs— Tom Arnold (@Tom Arnold) 1543784713.0
@TomArnold How do you not know something is anti-Semitic. #ComeOn— keith lyle (@keith lyle) 1543785859.0
@BuzzFeedNews Log everyone off everything now— Zinskē (@Zinskē) 1543635691.0
The organization refers to itself as the GDL, or Goyim Defense League. "Goyim" is the Hebrew word for a non-Jewish person.
According to BuzzFeed News, the group is run by two YouTubers who go by "Handsome Truth" and "Sway Guevara."
"Brett Favre here with a shoutout to the Handsome Truth and the GDL boys," they tricked Favre into saying. "You guys are patriots in my eyes. So keep waking them up and don't let the small get you down. Keep fighting, too, and don't ever forget the USS Liberty and the men and women who died on that day. God bless and take care."
The coded phrases here include "small" for "small hats," a slur for yarmulkes, and the USS Liberty:
"The USS Liberty is a dog whistle referring to an incident in 1967 where Israeli forces fired on the US spy ship, killing 34, during the Six-Day War. In the aftermath, Israel said that its pilots had thought the ship was an Egyptian vessel, and apologized — the government eventually paid out $6.7 million in reparations to the survivors and families of the dead. Ever since, there have been unproven conspiracy theories surrounding the circumstances that question whether the attack was intentional. Both the Israeli and the United States governments have said that it was a case of mistaken identity."
Soulja Boy was also tricked by the group, recording a video saying "Shoutout to Handsome Truth and Sway at GDL," and "GDL for life, b*tch."
The head of the group, Handsome Truth, admitted to the deception in a Livestream on Wednesday:
"Here's the deal, guys, they can reject it if they don't like it, right, so we were trying to get it, like — we wanted to be cryptic enough to where they would say it."
@BuzzFeedNews Sellebrities. I feel bad for people who are forced to treat themselves as products.— TomCat (@TomCat) 1543635593.0
@BuzzFeedNews Only in America...way to go potus, maga sadly 😟😥😠!!!— S Johnson (@S Johnson) 1543677369.0
@BuzzFeedNews This is what happens when you’ll do anything for money and fame...— gwyn (@gwyn) 1543641284.0
@BuzzFeedNews What a load of garbage!— Klopezdranat Tagor (@Klopezdranat Tagor) 1543682300.0
"Soulja Boy was unaware that the video on Cameo was tied to a group that promotes hate," said a Soulja Boy spokesperson. "The promo video was what the Cameo had directed and in no way supports his personal beliefs. He greatly apologizes to anyone who may have been offended."
The malice of this particular incident runs deep.
"On or about November 22nd, Cameo talent received requests that appeared to be aimed at supporting the American military. After recording the videos Cameo learned that the request came from an anti-Semitic group and contained content that could be interpreted as anti-Semitic," Cameo said in a statement to BuzzFeed News.
"This was a blatant misuse of the Cameo platform and a violation of Cameo's terms of service. This is the first incident of its kind in more than 93,000 Cameos and a gross misrepresentation of the talent's political beliefs," the statement continued. "Cameo immediately removed the videos from the website, requested YouTube to remove the content and created new filters to prevent this from happening in the future. The user has been banned from purchasing Cameos."
But will it quell the hate speech? Racism, anti-Semitism, homophobia, and misogyny have become commonplace since the election of Donald Trump, and it seems there are weekly incidents of that bigotry. Patrick Little, profiled by the Anti-Defamation League for spreading anti-Semitic hate speech, ran for State Senate in California, winning less than 2% of the vote and being barred from all California Republican events for his gross anti-Semitism. He greatly endorsed the white supremacists' actions.
If historical signs are correct, this sort of speech is likely to be misunderstood and catch fire, thereby inspiring even more hatred. The fight against bigotry must get stronger.
It only costs $500 to get Brett Favre to say something on video. So white supremacists used him to endorse anti-Sem… https://t.co/VdkFnujxrK— Gabriel Snyder (@Gabriel Snyder) 1543780513.0
Alexa, show me 2018 in one headline. https://t.co/7HtmwySIU4 via @mashable— Will Greenwald is still spooky in November (@Will Greenwald is still spooky in November) 1543754183.0
@mashable @BrettFavre may have been tricked, but vicious @ScottWalker taught our children to be Nazis and the best… https://t.co/7gMTCQCmRV— Brian Keith O'Hara (@Brian Keith O'Hara) 1543758130.0
just alt right folks paying Brett favre to unwittingly endorse anti semitism, the world is definitely not fundament… https://t.co/JaeOo61dXJ— R Zach Lamberty (@R Zach Lamberty) 1543635101.0
H/T: BuzzFeed News, Mashable
Arkansas High School Suspends Student Paper For Publishing 'Disruptive' Investigation Into Shady Football Transfers
Halle Roberts is the editor-in-chief of the Har-Ber Herald, the school newspaper for Springdale High School in Arkansas. The 17-year-old student was suspended after she wrote an investigative piece criticizing the transfer of five football players to a rival school.
Players are not allowed to be transferred to a different school because they would like to play for a different team. They are allowed to transfer only for academic reasons. So Roberts got to digging. Her paper filed FOIA requests and received official information from the Arkansas Activities Association saying that the students were transferred for academic reasons. However, the students themselves said otherwise.
Roberts quoted one student in her paper saying:
"We just want to go over there because we have a better chance of getting scholarships and playing at D1."
Another student told Roberts:
"I just feel like it's better for my future to go out there and get college looks."
Soon after the report was published, the superintendent of the district, Jim Rollins, asked the teacher advisor for the school paper, Karla Sprague, to take the story down. She obliged.
Rollins wrote a letter stating that the piece was:
"intentionally negative, demeaning, derogatory, hurtful and potentially harmful to the students addressed in those articles."
Roberts, undeterred, is still working on a new edition of the story that includes the school's censorship.
Mike Hiestand of the Student Press Law Center had this to say:
"School officials at this point seem to me to have completely thrown up their hands and said, ‘we’re not going to l… https://t.co/PgVYFlVAlM— Amber Jamieson (@Amber Jamieson) 1543687827.0
And Halle Roberts, who dreams of being an ESPN reporter, stated:
“They are like ‘well you raised an uproar, we’re going to try and silence you,’” said Halle Roberts, 17, the editor… https://t.co/6dKFeF0so4— Amber Jamieson (@Amber Jamieson) 1543690272.0
People were impressed with Roberts.
@hallecole21 @BuzzFeedNews I'm so proud of you! You're not just fighting for yourself, you're fighting for student… https://t.co/hjVIvzstZ1— 🌺Lisa Daily is writing⛱ (@🌺Lisa Daily is writing⛱) 1543718652.0
@hallecole21 @BuzzFeedNews I shared your story on my Facebook page and am so proud of you kids for telling the stor… https://t.co/9gekpHSwey— Derryl Trujillo (@Derryl Trujillo) 1543694164.0
@hallecole21 @BuzzFeedNews Keep up the fight Halle!!— Katie Maner (@Katie Maner) 1543762811.0
Some had harsh words for the school's administration.
@BuzzFeedNews @KatinaParon The principal and the superintendent should be fired, not the teacher. And the students… https://t.co/AfE6JTmowp— Jody Beck (@Jody Beck) 1543754569.0
@ambiej @BuzzFeedNews Abuse of power by the school administration— Lovehersports50 (@Lovehersports50) 1543686742.0
@ambiej Hey @sdaleschools School board members. Why are you allowing Arkansas Har-Ber High School Principal Paul Gr… https://t.co/8pdT0St1FO— Nancy Levine (@Nancy Levine) 1543693785.0
And most had high praise for Roberts and the other student journalists working on this piece.
A great example of investigate student journalism, and why it needs more recognition. https://t.co/s4MBLn0HiN— Gabija Gataveckaitė (@Gabija Gataveckaitė) 1543692451.0
Much to appreciate about @ambiej’s reporting on this Arkansas school district’s effort to suppress a high school pa… https://t.co/fIk5vTaWCZ— Pat Berry (@Pat Berry) 1543688372.0
High school students do real journalism, school district immediately tries to shut them down, despite state law gua… https://t.co/HqOgXTv1bl— Jeff Amy (@Jeff Amy) 1543692270.0
Oh this is the good stuff. I love this editor. Great work. Stand for journalists. https://t.co/QlrTTzrqs8— Scott Lewis (@Scott Lewis) 1543693549.0
And Halle Roberts herself closed by saying:
thank you so much. #freedomofthepress https://t.co/LsjWT7nycD— halle roberts (@halle roberts) 1543685392.0
Fight on, Halle!
Clever Dog Tricks McDonald's Customers Into Feeding Her By Pretending To Be A Stray 😂
It's a dog eat dog world out there and sometimes a girl has to do what a girl has to do. At least that's what one dog owner realized when she caught her pooch trolling the streets looking for an easy meal.
Facebook user Betsy Reyes busted her dog Princess who was out moonlighting as a stray in order to play on the sympathies of strangers. It seems Princess likes to wander off to her favorite hangout, the local McDonald's, and work the drive through lane like a pro.
And that's what she did right up until Reyes busted her scam. Reyes, who lives in Oklahoma City, took to Facebook and outed Princess in the most hysterical way, saying:
"If you see my dog @ the McDonald's on shields, quit feeding her fat ass bc she don't know how to act & be leaving the house all the time to go walking to McDonald's at night. She's not even a stray dog. She's just a gold diggin ass bitch that be acting like she's a stray so people will feel bad for her & feed her burgers."
Lots of scammers out there.
@CBSNews My lab Would jump the fence every morning as I got ready to work and when I went to leave he would reappea… https://t.co/NJhg4ZuGq1— Anneik 💛 (@Anneik 💛) 1540434345.0
@CBSNews https://t.co/UqWvClKi8z— Bruinlover- follower of Nakia (@Bruinlover- follower of Nakia) 1540418292.0
@CBSNews I TOOK MINE TO THE DRUGSTORE AND WHILE I WAS PAYING HE STOLE A CANDY BAR, WALKED RIGHT OUT THE DOOR WI… https://t.co/U3DlWunzcK— PUEBLO294 (@PUEBLO294) 1540415919.0
@LCaro294 @CBSNews Mine stole a butterdish at my mum’s house, ate all the butter then buried the butterdish to hide the evidence.— Tricoteuse (@Tricoteuse) 1540418005.0
@CBSNews My dog would 100% do this if she could get out of the house. On our walks she stands in the doorways of fo… https://t.co/33ovz44HUX— Skulls&Bacon (@Skulls&Bacon) 1540420511.0
@BillichThomas @skullsandbacon @CBSNews 100% would hand over my bagel, if only because she looks so annoyed with me… https://t.co/aQs5qKhETN— Claire Pettie (@Claire Pettie) 1540434235.0
It's an adorable story, but maybe get the dog a collar with identification?
@CBSNews Pretends? Leaves the collar stashed around the corner, or what?— Jim Snell (@Jim Snell) 1540429214.0
@CBSNews This is adorable but this dog should 100% be wearing a collar and also get microchipped! Love this story :)— Minka “ACAB” Eisenhower (@Minka “ACAB” Eisenhower) 1540418766.0
Not everyone thought the story was cute.
@CBSNews Great way to keep your dog safe. 🙄— 🧚🏻♂️ Free Hugs 🌊 🇺🇸🇳🇴🇫🇮☮️⚛️ Ⓥ🌱😷 (@🧚🏻♂️ Free Hugs 🌊 🇺🇸🇳🇴🇫🇮☮️⚛️ Ⓥ🌱😷) 1540414161.0
@CBSNews Unless you can keep your dog safe at home and not out in traffic where she could be hit by a car, stolen,… https://t.co/6BMPMLYgYs— Lindsey McBride (@Lindsey McBride) 1540435397.0
Of course, when a girl's gotta eat, a girl's gotta eat.
@chabsmescudi Funny.... but time to build a super gate. https://t.co/NZBE1s3lm6— OEL𝕊𝕂𝕐 (@OEL𝕊𝕂𝕐) 1540238320.0
@chabsmescudi The dog: https://t.co/FSmeFYhspT— Angie (@Angie) 1540231585.0
@BetsysReyes @chabsmescudi Your dog every night after standing on the road https://t.co/mrTCMOtOVA— N.A.S.A (@N.A.S.A) 1540235406.0
@chabsmescudi I would have been mad if my dog didn’t bring anything back. https://t.co/qb7ED7cwMG— Name Change (@Name Change) 1540325221.0
Let's hope Princess has learned her lesson and stays home.
H/T: Huffington Post, Mashable