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Men Reveal What Confuses Them About Other Guys

Men are confusing creatures, even to other men. We do weird things, act tough for no reason, and often fear emotion. Why? Who knows.

Rancerle asked men of Reddit: What about men confuses you?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.


10. We don't get it either.

Everything. I don't know how I got this far.

DonaldDucc-

Same. I was raised by a single mother. I don't understand just about everything guys do as a group and I get super uncomfortable around more than one or two of them anyway

SamURLJackson

I'm in this comment and I don't like it.

zdemigod

I got to this point by


Ten percent luck

Twenty percent skill

Fifteen percent concentrated power of will

Five percent pleasure

Fifty percent bluffing my a-- off and having no one call me on it

And a hundred percent reason to remember the name.

Zediac

9. Because men aren't supposed to feel.

Why is so hard to make friends as adults? It was so easy when I was a kid, even as a teenager, but now everybody want to either sell me something or making me work for free, like, everyone I meet just want to talk business, usually bad business.

I can make female friends, but not male friends, WTF?

Mr-Zero-F*ucks

This speaks to me. I have lots of female friends and can regularly get them to hang out but making commitments with guy friends is impossible. Then I'll meet a cool guy and try to find a time to hang out and... nothing.

DJ_Apex

Women generally tend to be interested in people. It amazes me how little dudes generally talk about each other's lives. You're conditioned to shun emotion.

caffeinquest

8. Toxic masculinity is ruining the world.

I'm always confused by men who want to start fights and are constantly aggressive. I'm a Marine, so I know what it feels like to be amped up on adrenaline and what it's like to fight. All that means the last thing I ever want to do when I'm out at a bar is get into a fight, let along start one over something stupid. There have certainly been a couple times when I've had to calm myself down, but everyone has those experiences. I just hate hothead macho men with nothing better to do than look for opportunities to be outraged by something. It's like dogs who think they see someone they don't know in front of their house.

beauty-tapir

7. "Whoa.=, I wish I was that cool." - Nobody

Loud mufflers. They don't make your Honda sound like a Ferrari. They make it sound like a broken Honda.

InfinitePizzazz

One of my friends the other day was super confused as to why people don't like loud mufflers.

I can't imagine any situation where I'd have my conversation interrupted by loud rumbling and not be pissed off

RuPaulver


You mean people don't like being woken up in the morning or dead of night by some twats belting up and down the motorway in their sh!tmobiles?

I wish it were legal to jam the exhausts up.

Preacherjohnson

6. F*ck off, the mood.

Why do they always want to fight after any sort of conflict—I yelled "nice" at this guy who cut in front of traffic and he rolled down his window and yelled "let's f*ckin fight bro come on."

pienerparker

Last year I was letting my dog out, my neighbors have a bonfire going. I ask over the fence "making smores?" And the guy just looks at me and yells "GO F*CK YOURSELF" and stares me down. Seems a reasonable reaction.

ManicFirestorm

Probably just didn't want to share his smores the greedy bastard

Milkman543

5. "cAuSe It'S gAy..."

The men that are scared to hang out 1 on 1 because someone might think we're on a date. It's real, look it up.

PrestonMoncrief

Funny you say that. A good friend of mine and I grab food every few months. We went to a restaurant (ok, it was Olive Garden) and the hostess tried seating us next to one another, side by side.

She blushed when I elected to sit across the table. Can't two dudes enjoy a night at Olive Garden when they want without everyone thinking it's a date??

stonewall_jacked

Homophobia runs so f*cking deep it's not even funny. I'll never understand why people are afraid of people they have never met thinking they're gay. Or just people in general thinking that, literally who cares.

CaptainBritish

4. Mind the gap.

When I'm standing at a urinal peeing and a guy comes up to use the one right next to me and there are clearly open urinals further down the row. Why do this? Don't you know you're breaking men's restroom etiquette?

Sithrandil

A guy at my work not only does this, but will start talking. F*ck off bud, some of us are pee shy!

GhastlySprite

As for people who try to talk while they're sat on the toilet, there is nobody on the planet I want to talk to while something is halfway out of their butthole.

RancidLemons

3. Narrator: it isn't.

You really think the way to a girls heart is by sending her a picture of your penis?

alexmunse

Oddly, quite effective on Grindr though.

Zeliek

2. Lift the seat.

Why do you pee all over the seat and not clean it? I get when you have to go badly and no time to lift the seat. But you have to know you made a mess and I'm sure when you walk into a piss covered stall you also get pissed.

bledtobefree

Especially when they do it in their own house. Over at a friend's house and there's piss splattered on the floor or wall around the toilet. Dude, if you can't get it all in the pot, just sit down. It's your own house. You're pissing all over your own house. I don't get it.

i_finite

1. Guys, chill.

I'm not hitting on your damn gf I'm just trying to see if our answers for the homework are the same.

needtopeeat218am

I was talking to a girl about a project we had to do For a graduate class and I was asking her for help with one specific part of it. While I was messaging her through Facebook, I got another message from her boyfriend that said, "Stop messaging my girlfriend and worry about yourself."

He was a cop who had graduated from college like a year before. I said to her, "uh I think your boyfriend just messaged me." I sent her the screen cap of his message and she apologized for him, and I'm assuming she talked to him. Every time I saw him he'd give me the stink eye or something. They eventually got married. I hope that's going well.

reed12321

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Nothing is a coincidence in the complex Marvel Cinematic Universe.

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Some of the suggestions were interesting, to say the least.





The official choices: Shark Week, The McRib Is Back, Kieran (submitted by his famous younger brother), Macaulay Culkin, and Publicity Stunt. That last one was suggested by Culkin's girlfriend, actress Brenda Song, and gives away the game.

Fans are still excited to vote for his new name.







This is all a publicity stunt to drive traffic to Culkin's website, Bunny Ears, launched earlier this year in March. The site bills itself as a lifestyle and holistic health brand, similar to Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop. However, the articles are jokes or satirical.

Good luck finding the site if you tried to go there right after the Fallon segment.

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Time will tell what Culkin's new middle name will be, but as of this writing, it's looking like he'll be known as Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin. Which is a shame, because Macaulay Shark Week Culkin had such a nice ring to it.

H/T: Huffington Post, Bunny Ears