Reddit user, u/Nacho36, wanted to hear about the most angst-filled anger ever when they asked:
What's the angriest you've ever been?
Parents Being Awful
My parents forcing me to intervene and pick sides in their divorce even though I feel like I'm too old for that drama. And if dont pick a side, I'm disowned from both.
That sh-t got me so mad I started crying
Stand Up For Yourself
My dad was once being an a--hole to my mother. I told him to stop. He threatened to break my jaw.
I told him to do it then.
Adulthood started early for me.
From One Brother...
GiphyThis boy literally almost threw my brother over a bridge after school.
Over f-cking Fortnite.
...To Another
When my brother stole $700 from me when I was 16.
That was years worth of savings.
Standing Up For Those Who Can't
My dad has Parkinson's and some cognitive difficulty and a few years ago I was over and found out that a guy conned him into paying $100 to "fix" a spot on his bumper by spraypainting it silver. He didn't understand and had taken the money out of his wallet and given it to the guy.
I completely lost my sh-t and cursed him out on my lawn in front of my parents. My blood was boiling, they had never heard me speak like that before. I think it struck a nerve for me because he was fairly high up in the NYPD for 25 years and involved in a lot of heroic situations, so it was really hard to see him unable to deal with this simple crook.
Ugh, Kids, Again...
Background: When I was young, my family was in a car wreck. A horse had gotten out of its pen and tried to jump over our car. Landed on my dad's side and broke his neck. He's fine now, but that really screws up a kid.
Fast forward: I'm a freshman in high school. Class jerkoff decided to start giving me crap about horses and how my dad should've died. I started across the classroom at him, for the only time in my life fully intending on killing someone.
I'd been in martial arts for several years at that point and knew exactly what I was going for. The asst. football coach tackled me while the jerkoff was pulled out of the room.
In hindsight, I'm really glad the coach did that. This guy was a lawyer's kid, and it scares me to think how my life would have been wrecked by that outcome.
Just Tell Me!
My gf cheated on me. Not a once-off, but over months with many guys.
What made me mega-angry is that pretty much everyone in my friend group knew, and it was so funny that they managed to keep it from me for so long.
When You Know They Did It...An Can Do Nothing
My moms crackhead girlfriend stole most of my pain medication after I had emergency surgery and sold it. She also sold a bunch of my other belongings like a skateboard and bass guitar.
When I confronted her she guilt tripped me and told me I was f-cked up for even thinking it was her because my mom died of drug related issues and I "know what she went through" with my mom.
Probably Won't Be The Last Time He Doesn't Get A Date
I was suspended 4 days from school based on false accusations from a guy because I didn't want to date him. Extremely abusive and manipulative person. Administration didn't believe a word I said and also suspended people who supported my side. 100% the angriest i've ever been.
Sounds Like You Need Better People In Your Life
When my ex cheated on me twice,acted like she never did that to me,and then I went into a blind rage for the whole day.
That and when my best friend of 4 years started to pretend like I and our other mutual friend didn't exist.No explanation,nothing.
She just pretends like we don't exist.
When I was in high school I was big into Warhammer.
For those that have never heard of it, Warhammer is a tabletop game played with armies of hand-assembled, hand-painted models. They are very expensive and take hours of personal work to be "finished." Now, as a high school student my army cost about as much time and money as I had. I kept it all in a foam-packed case that by itself cost about $90. The army itself cost about $350, and a good amount of it was a gift from my parents. I had spent dozens of hours painting them.
So imagine my reaction when I caught my twin sister trying to throw my case out my bedroom window. I'm not saying it was totally unwarranted - we had had an argument prior that I was totally complicit in - but I had just walked in on her trying to destroy months of work and money, and she was DRASTICALLY escalating the kind of tit-for-tat we had started. In that moment, to my reptile brain, she wasn't my sister - she was a threat.
I slammed her to the ground and pinned her by the neck. Not hard enough to choke her, but she wasn't going anywhere. I fixed her dead in the eyes and told her if she ever came into my room again, I would murder her. I didn't say "kill," I said "murder," and as far as I'm concerned that makes it worse. Then I blinked, took a look at myself and what I was doing, and let her go.
Not my proudest moment. She didn't know how much the models were worth, she thought they were simply toys, and I can only imagine I scared the sh-t out of her. To my parents' credit, they handled everything very well when they got home and heard what happened. I fessed up myself, I didn't want them to hear it from her. They were sympathetic about me protecting my property, but I was sternly reprimanded for using physical force to threaten anybody, however briefly.
No One Touches My Siblings
Found out a friend of my friend slapped my little sister for not giving him her number while my "friend" laughed, I went nuclear and knocked both of them out.
I've always been really protective of her since my dad was abusive to my mum, sister and myself.
A Big Bullet Dodged
The time that I found out my ex was looking at child p*rn and his family didn't find out he had been doing this until the cops came to his door.
At the time we were dating, I was hoping to get married one day and start a family.
He told me either the day after it had occurred or something. I still remember being so disappointed at the time, screaming and crying towards him.
Dodged a bullet with that one.
Why Do You Think I'm Here???
GiphyWent to the financial aid officer at uni and they spoke to me as if I was about to steal their money and treated me like sh-t the entire time.
I lost it when the lady said 'if your father couldn't afford it why did he send you to college'
SO THAT I LIVE A BETTER LIFE SO THAT MY DREAMS COME TRUE YOU CHEWED UP PIECE OF GUM UNDER MY SHOE
League Of Legends Is The Worst
A few months ago i broke my chair cuz of fkn league of legends
It was at that point I realized that sh-t aint healthy
Anger Needs To Be Discussed
Teacher here. Was on a sub assignment before earning credential. Middle school. Kid I knew had a sibling in Highschool commit suicide just days ago. Found her sobbing between bells, asked if she wanted to step out and talk, or if she wanted some privacy, or anything.
She doesn't say anything for an uncomfortable minute and slowly passes me a balled-up paper. I unballed it and read it. Someone who had been bullying her left her a note gloating over the death and all the reasons why they deserved to be dead and burning in hell.
Three things happened that day after reading that paper. The first is that I scared a cluster of incoming students and some faculty after slamming the door behind me loud enough to trigger a seismic event. The second is that I ran, literally ran into the principal's office, closed the door behind me and laid out the paper on her desk with a quiet, "look at this sh-t." The third is that the final straw was laid for said student to receive an expulsion.
I was upset during the next period and ignored the sub plan for the first time ever, and I talked about it with the students. They seemed relieved to be able to address recent events and talked about how jarring it all was, going through school assignments like nothing happened.
The affected students were not in the class. The bullied girl was prioritized for counseling services. I hope she's okay, I still think about it a lot. I was told later the letter writer was expelled and several other students received serious consequences. I appoligized for being unprofessional with the principal, but she took it in stride. I was hired a number of times after that incident, so I am guessing it was forgiven.
Days like that can change how one looks at humanity.
Reddit user, u/giggglygirl, wanted to hear what your mom made you memorize when they asked:
What's the best advice your mom ever gave you?
Trust Your Gut. Seriously. Go With It.
If there's an uncomfortable feeling in your gut about a person, situation, or place, go with it. Listen to it and either protect yourself or gtfo.
Look In A Mirror Once In A While
Oh and also: "If you dislike someone for a character trait, make sure you don't have the same one. Things that annoy you in others, might be things you do yourself."
Never Not Mean It
GiphySomething my grandfather told her, then she told me: "Hugs and handshakes, give them like you mean it"
Always Be Looking Ahead
"Happiness is just having something to look forward to."
You had your issues, mom, but this advice has served me well.
Again With The Mirrors. Must Mean Something.
"Look in the mirror and see if you see a friend in there.
If you don't, take a longer look and get the friend back."
Stop Taking It All So Seriously
My mom said "you young people get confused about dates, a date is just suppose to be a fun get together with someone, not meaning you're picking out life partners and deciding what house to buy. Just go out on a date, and have fun together, stop taking it so serious", this is one of the things i keep remembering when trying to go out on dates...(not that that happens that often).
You Are Not More Important Than They Are
In exasperation, my mom told me, "When you show up late, it tells people that you think your time is more important than theirs."
I used to be [chronically] late to nearly everything. And that statement just crushed me because I love my mom and my friends and would never purposely be disrespectful. I had just never looked at it that way before. I'm rarely late anymore and it's been amazing how something so seemly small has improved my relationships and has all around made my life better and less stressful than I could have expected. Wish Mom would have laid into me sooner.
And Then What Do We Always Do?
Giphy"Don't touch that, it's too hot!"
I learnt that it was, indeed, too hot.
What I love about this childhood trope is that almost all of us touched it anyway
Guess it is hard for the danger version of the word 'hot' to have a real meaning without figuring it out yourself as well
It Only Happens To You Once
"You will never have to live this day again"- on my very first memorably bad day, coming home from school unable to stop sobbing.
I reuse it whenever trying to console someone after specific pains.
Everything Changes. Mostly You.
When I was a pre-teen she told me "as you get older you're going to think everyone around you is changing. It's not them that are changing, it's how you see the world that is changing"
I thought that was super weird advice, but as I got older and started to see adults for who they really were it really made sense. They weren't changing, I'd just never noticed that side of them before. I genuinely think it's why I wasn't a bratty teen, because I knew my parents were still the same parents, I was just seeing everything differently.
Reddit user, u/Sylvizard, wanted to hear the saddest screenings you've had when they asked:
Parents of Reddit, when was your worst case of not checking a show before showing it to your kids?
Maybe Skip The First 15 Minutes For Younger Viewers...
GiphyShazam. For my 11 year old autistic son who is a big fan of superheroes. Everyone kept talk about how heartwarming and family oriented it was. I thought I was in the clear... until... a woman was incinerated and her flesh melted off and turned to charcoal dust... and then we were introduced to 7 demons which represented the 7 deadly sins. One of the demons bit the head off a man in a boardroom.
My son freaked the ever loving freak out.
You Grow And You Learn. Hopefully.
My Dad to me and my brother to see Wayne's World in the theater. I was 10, my brother was maybe 14.
Upon rewatch as an adult I actually understood the jokes. Not really appropriate for a 10 year old, IMO.
Edited to add: My husband totally thought it was fine to let the 5 year old and 3 year old watch Raiders of the Lost Ark, because "it's not that scary!" I then had to remind him of the part where THE NAZI DUDE'S FACE MELTS OFF.
And Then They Remade It!?
When I was a kid, it was Watership Down. I still remember the horror. Cute bunnies on the cover, but an absolute bloodbath filled with disturbing imagery awaits.
As a parent myself, YouTube! You really never know what you're getting on YouTube. There's plenty of great content for kids, but they're always just a few clicks away from a Holocaust documentary or true crime footage.
When You Can't Trust Anyone
I checked, but the response was misleading. A South American friend highly recommended this art film; the title was "Black God, White Devil". I asked if it were suitable for young children. She said that it was totally suitable; no problem. So I took my wife and kids, aged 5 and 6.
Just as they were preparing to hack a baby to death with a machete on screen, I yelled at my wife and kids and we ran out.
"How did anyone think that was appropriate for young kids?" I wondered. Still wondering.
Come On Now, It's Just...The Devil...
I have a much younger sister and let her watch "Rosemary's Baby" with me when she was five and I was old enough that I should have known to read the plot summary beforehand.
Emilio!
I played the Mighty Ducks to a group of first graders I was subbing for.
There's quite a few bad words I had forgotten about.
Freddy's Gonna Get You...
When I was about 6 or so my mom and dad had company over and were all sitting around the kitchen table drinking coffee and talking.
My sister and I kept running around and being loud and interrupting the adults, and after many repeated warnings to be quieter my dad escorted us into the living room, assigned us each a seat, and told us to be quiet and not to get up, and that the next time we interrupted them we'd get spanked. Then he turned on the TV and left.
We preceded to see some sort of sex scene where a woman pulled out a guy's tongue and used it to tie him to his bed. Then the BBEG appeared.... It was Freddy Krueger!
NSFW: The Scene.
We cried for him and he came in mad, but then saw what was on TV and apologized lol.
But, Chimichangas?
GiphyMy kids insisted I take them to Deadpool because their friends saw it.
Being the nice why not you're only a kid once kind of dad I am, I sat through too many awkward gratuitous sex scenes and made them promise we wouldn't say anything to mom but they were cool about the whole thing.
Watching Someone Else Goof Up
I worked at a movie theatre once upon a time. I was working as an usher this particular night, so once the run of showings started, things got quiet for me.
Until some dad came storming out of a theatre with his wife and kids in tow, ranting about how he thought they were seeing a cowboy movie.
Brokeback Mountain ain't for everyone.
You REALLY Messed Up There....
Happy Tree Friends
Was hoping for this comment, thank you for traumatising your children for our entertainment.
Oh this ain't SO bad...
Blazing Saddles.
Anything by Mel Brooks! Spaceballs is also not appropriate for children. Woops.
I adored spaceballs growing up but as a little kid i just would say "I wanna see balls". Lot of embaressment on my moms part
Roger is the best.
Well My friend told me once that his parents didn't know what American Dad was and they let him watch it downstairs while they were upstairs one time (He was About 7 years old at the time )and then about 3 days later his mom told him she was doing the dishes and he said: "Yeah you do that bitch." He didn't know what curse words were until he watched American Dad. His mom got pisssssed.
Oh God
Sausage Party.
That's the worst one possible in this situation.
Wurst?
Grisly
My parents let me watch Robocop when I was about 6.
Funny enough, it wasn't the massive gun fights, or the dude turning into toxic waste when hit by a car, or the blood, but when Robocop took off his mask thing. That freaked me out horribly and gave me nightmares.
I didn't know Robocop wasn't a family-friendly movie until about 2 years ago. I still haven't seen it, but when I was a toddler my slightly older cousins were obsessed with it.
Frank n beans, hair gel
When I was a kid, we were taken to watch Something about Mary. HAHA then quickly left to watch cats vs dogs.
I first saw parts of that movie (Something about Mary) when I was younger (around 10 y/o) and always wondered why her hair was standing up like that... only just realized a few years ago after re watching it as an adult what it was (0.0)
Reddit user, u/throw212awaay, shared his story about one of those times when a door was opened for him and asked for advice:
I have been dating the most amazing woman for the past year and a half. I have been in puppy love before, the kind where they're all you can think about and you smile when you think of them - and we have that too- but she has also brought to me the joy of being together but not together (that magnificent way you can just be and be alone in the same room- her reading a book, me doing a project) and really knowing someone (knowing how her mouth crinkles when she thinks, the way the rain makes her feel,all the stories of her childhood, all the little stuff that makes her a person ). At least I thought I did.
I was shopping for a ring and had been dropping hints that made her smile and we would plan this little suburban life- a deck with a grill, a goofy puppy, a piano. We talked about baby names and vetoed ones, we have the joke names Trevor and Trevina. We'd pick out paint colors and flooring at Lowe's and giggle like idiots. I was 100% confident, I just hadn't chosen a ring, you know,she didn't want a diamond but didn't know what she does want.
Then I got a fb message today from some guy. He said that he was her brother-in-law and that she had blocked him on fb but could I please pass along a wedding invite and it would mean a lot if she was there.
I pressed for more details and it all came out. She was married before to a guy named Brendan and they had a little boy, Sam- she told me before she didn't like that name. The son died in a car accident and afterwards They had an ugly divorce and she cut ties. 5 years of her life, I never knew about and I don't know if I ever would've. I think she was never going to tell me.
I've felt sick about this all day. Made up an imaginary sickness to sit and think by myself and I feel paralyzed by it. This morning I knew her and now I don't. I don't even know how to bring this up or what. I definitely can't go buy the ring and pretend. At the same time, I want to be with. I am hurt but know that was horrible, that she went through something unimaginable but I don't know what that means for us. Am I just a distraction? Is this something she does?
I just don't know. Help?
tl;dr I(30m) just found out my girlfriend(28) of a year+ had a whole life I knew nothing about, right as I've been ring shopping. This life includes a first marriage and a child who passed away. i am stunned.. Advice?
Start The Honesty Train
GiphyShow her the message, and gently ask her about it.
Losing a child is awful and everyone mourns in their own way. Perhaps she would have told you after you guys were officially engaged. Or when you were going to seriously try for a baby.
It's not about you, OP, and I really doubt you are just a distraction. You still know her.
Seriously, stop thinking about it, and just talk to her.
Maybe It Was Nothing
GiphyI think you may be slightly overreacting.
It sounds like she had a pretty tough, emotional time that maybe she isn't ready to share with anyone.
Just because you were in ring shopping mode, doesn't mean she has to talk to you about her deepest emotional feelings of loss. I mean, imagine - you've lost your child and then your marriage falls apart, that's life changing.
I suggest you mention it and see what comes of the conversation. I doubt she was trying to hide anything from you.
Reflect On Your Choices
Giphyshe told me before she didn't like that name
Completely understandable after what happened, and I'm 100% positive she would never want any of her future kids to be called that name.
Anyway, you need to talk to her about this. Don't make it about you e.g. by asking things like 'why didn't you tell me? How could you not mention this to me'.
Her past contains a lot of hurt, and shutting it out of her life is one way to get over it and move on (same like everyone here recommends to go no contact after a breakup).
Ask yourself this. If your gf had told you all of this herself earlier in your relationship, would it have been a big deal and would you still love her and want to be there for her?
If the answer is yes, you would want to still be with her, then you need to work on how to be understanding.
If you can show her that you still love, support and trust her, even when you know her deepest, darkest secrets, then your relationship will only grow stronger.
Don't Be Another Pity Party
You need to sit and talk to her.
You also need to keep in mind that when a parent loses a child everyone they know (close and distant) will feel sorry/pity them. Maybe your the one person in her life who doesn't look at her with pity in their eyes. Doesn't skirt around certain issues.
Like it or not certain occurrences forever alter how we interact with people and for once she just wanted something normal, something she had before the loss of everything.
She could have also had bad reactions from past partners when she told them this and she didn't want to jeopardise what you had. Then the longer she left it the harder it became to bring up.
There's also the third option that's she denying it ever happened, even to herself. Its a known coping mechanism. If that is the one she is using then it will eventually catch up with her. You can never outrun your past, as you're seeing now.
It's not right to lie for so long to someone you plan to spend your life with but in this case it is understandable. No one can understand how it feels to loose a child unless you have lost one yourself.
Be kind when you raise the issue. Don't allow any temper into the conversation and allow her to get it out as she needs to. Please don't force her to answer all your questions unless she is ok to do so.
Remember, It's Only Half About You
GiphyAm I just a distraction? Is this something she does?
This is extremely concerning to me. Why would you think this? You think this is about you? Is this something she does?? What, have a kid, that kid dies and then she has a horrible divorce? Yeah, I'm sure that's just "what she does". Jeez dude. I know you're shocked, but take a step back for a minute.
Think It Through
Okay, this is the sort of deception you can work through with help, given that we all understand that a loss of a child will, well, f-ck you up for lack of a better turn of phrase. I can understand wanting to lock that away from yourself, which it seems like she did.
Take the space you need to approach this rationally, since it seems like you haven't talked to her. From there, you can evaluate if this is workable or not.
Be Prepared For The End
GiphySome people go through something so traumatic that they need a restart in life.
Move to a new place, make new friends, make new love, and block out the past.
The death of a child definitely counts as one of these. She obviously does NOT want to think about this, or deal with it at the moment.
I'd be very careful on how you broach the subject with her. If you go after her angry or as a victim don't be surprised at being dropped. You need to get over your hurt feelings and think about this from her point of view.
[usernamedeleted]
Maybe Let It Go?
GiphyOn one hand I can see why your is steamed OP.
On the other I can see a mother who's life imploded in the worst possible way and likely has no desire to relive those event again in any way.
I'm a parent and I can't even comprehend what it would be like to lose my child. I can't even try and think of what that would feel like.
I wouldn't confront her about this. I would pass on the invitation, I would let her know that I would be willing to listen, and hold her, if she wants to share her past. I would also have a question, Will her past impact our future or is there anything we/you/me could do to help ensure it doesn't?
Some People Just Need To Run Away
Oh, man. What a situation.
You are probably not a distraction, and this is probably not "something she does." This is not okay, not by a long shot, but it could honestly be that she was hoping to just outrun the grief. To not have it be part of her anymore.
When you go through something awful, it's a lot easier, sometimes, to only be around people that don't know about it. Rudyard Kipling even wrote a poem that talks about this--the lines
There is knowledge God forbid / More than one should own
always suggested to me something that I learned as a teenager--sometimes when people know you've been through Hell, when they look at you, Hell is all they see. It holds you there. It makes it really hard to outgrow the horrors of the where-you've-been, when you can see it reflected in people's eyes.
So...from my perspective this was probably not an attempt at manipulation, but instead an attempt to just...not be that person anymore. Not be the grieving mother, not be the injured ex-wife, not be the divorcee whose marriage and relationship with family was shattered (even now, her ex-brother-in-law wants her company! That does not tell me that she is a bad person).
That does not, however, make it okay. Not when the two of you are talking about marriage. She should have told you when you started talking about rings and baby names, and you're not wrong to feel conflicted and maybe a bit angry and hurt about it. Stunned, absolutely.
My advice would be to sit her down and to tell her that her brother-in-law got in touch with you. Don't accuse, don't shout, don't get angry, just tell her that you were told to pass on a wedding invitation, and see how she responds to that. Be calm.
Does knowing that she has lived through this grief make you less likely to want to marry her? Does knowing that she bore and lost a child make you less likely to want to have children with her?
H/T: Reddit
Reddit user, u/woodside37, wanted to better understand what those with the mental disorder experience when they asked:
Schizophrenics of Reddit; What is the scariest hallucination (visually or audibly) that you have ever experienced?
Helping A Friend Down The Black Hall
GiphyMy friend in college was schizophrenic. We were once hanging out in his dorm room at night (maybe 11pm/midnight) and he got up to go to the bathroom... He opened the door and stopped, staring at the empty hallway. He asked me to come to the door and tell him if something seemed weird. I walk up to the door and see nothing strange in the hall and tell him so. He asks me if I can hear something, I say no. He said he heard muffled crying or arguing or something coming from down the hall. And he saw a pitch black hallway when it was actually fully lit. He said the hall was BLACK not just dark or dimly lit. At this point he is shaking and I'm terrified because I don't know he's sick, we're both on the verge of tears. I'm not even sure he knew he was sick at the time. I ended up walking him to the bathroom and then spending the night in his room because he could still hear someone crying in the hall. I thought for the longest time he was pulling my leg, but he ended up going to therapy and getting on meds very shortly after that night, so it was a terrifying and very real moment for him too.
The Voices Can't Speak
Fortunately the scariest I've ever had is just people calling my name from another room when I know I'm the only person in the house. My audible hallucinations don't have a great vocabulary, and most of the time just sound like someone doing jazz scat, which is kind of annoying and makes it hard to sleep. Visually I'll sometimes see people standing in windows who aren't there on a second glance, or small shadows darting around like mice. I'm extremely fortunate that my symptoms are relatively mild.
The People Who Weren't There
GiphyAs for my scariest hallucination? It will always be my first visual hallucination.
I was in school, like, 10th grade, and I'd heard voices for a bit now, to the point that I was almost getting used to the fact that I hear things others don't. I remember getting up from my desk to use the toilet, and when I got out of the room, I see this man with no face, just standing there facing me. At first I just thought my eyes were messing with me, so I blink a couple times, shake my head a little bit, and look back. And he's gone. No way he could have moved in those empty, silent hallways without me hearing it, but he's gone. So I just go to the bathroom, thinking it's kinda weird, but not thinking too much about it. I even joked with myself that "now I'm seeing things too haha".
But when I got to the bathroom, he's there again, standing in the doorway. I stop and just kind of stare for a second, more curious than anything, then I think: "well maybe he's just wearing a mask or something", and I ask if he can move over and let me in the bathroom, but then this other kid comes out and asks who I'm talking to, right as he walks through the faceless guy. I just stand there, speechless, cause what do you say in that situation? The kid looks at me like I'm weird, but then just walks away. The dude with no face moves over to let me by, and I give him as wide a berth as I can while I go in, never taking my eyes off him. He followed me into the bathroom, and a few seconds later this girl walks in, and I begin telling her that she's in the wrong bathroom (I'm a guy fyi), when I notice that she doesn't have a face either. They both begin walking towards me, and at that point I'm pretty damn scared, so I go and hide in one of the stalls and bawl my eyes out, cause at this point I realize that I'm pretty much just crazy. I didn't come out until the staff came and talked me into it.
The two of them (the guy and the girl) show up every now and again (note, I've since graduated and moved away from there, but they still show up wherever I am), but they never do anything, so I don't know what to make of it, but that first time scared the living sh-t out of me.
Memories That Never Were
GiphySchizoaffective, bipolar subtype.
Sometimes I have very vivid memories of things that didn't happen. And they make me second guess every single thing that I can remember or know because if my memory failed me once, why wouldn't it fail me twice?
And then everything spirals downwards.
Do You Know Your Own Body?
GiphyOne of the veins in my eye was actually a worm that was eating my brain and thats why I had headaches.
Also: random sharp pains and itches are bugs crawling all over my skin, trapped in my shoes, etc. I double check my shoes every time I put them on with a flashlight but still have to take them off occasionally to check.
The Screams Are Normal
GiphyEMS
I had a patient with schizophrenia. Full visual and auditory hallucinations. Off of his meds and screaming in public. Demons were coming out of the ground trying to grab him. They were yelling at him various obscene things.
Weird part was that once we are on scene, he calmed down and recognized the uniforms. Fully cooperative, but that was an interesting patient history.
Are you having hallucinations?
Yup. describes them in detail
So how are you so calm right now?
This is normal when I am off my meds and I know I am in an ambulance.
THIS WAS NORMAL FOR HIM
Marching Shadows
GiphyI have psychosis and it usually is worst when I'm alone or at night. Doubly so if I'm alone at night. When I was housetraining my puppy I had him outside at 3am, and I saw what looked like the KKK and some witches having a seance. I then heard whispers mentioning killing and saw the group start walking up the street towards my house.
Thankfully, that's the worst it's ever been. I do still have minor fleeting hallucinations when I'm stressed, but it's more like seeing a shadow out of the corner of my eye and is much easier to ignore.
Target: YOU
Snipers. One Friday evening I was watching TV, and happened to be playing with a flashlight that I'd left on the coffee table. Boom, next thing you know I'm in a full blown hallucination. I heard a special forces team out the window, as they were sneaking out of my back yard. I flashed the light around the room, and they got quiet, and they misunderstood my intent; they thought the light was mounted on a rifle.
Next thing you know they're calling me outside as part of a SWAT response, and I'm on my hands and knees on my porch in the dead of knight, asking them to please not shoot me. I must have stayed out there about two hours, with my hands locked behind my head, as the snipers got more and more nervous about what I might do.
Eventually they decided that there was no way to defuse the situation, and they shot me. I spent about five minutes laying dead on my front porch, then crawled inside my house to die. I phoned my mom to let her know that I'd been shot and that special forces had killed me. Needless to say she wasn't buying it, and talked me down to earth a little bit, but that wasn't the end of it.
She had me go to the ER, and stayed with me on the phone until I got there. I'm still in full blown hallucination mode, so while I'm waiting in the ER I hear the leader of the special forces unit chatting with the front desk nurse. He knows that I'm there, and is coming to get me. Luckily the doctor found me first, and didn't really know what to do with me, so he gave me 2 milligrams of Ativan and discharged me.
So I drive home, still hallucinating and now somewhat high from the Ativan, and I see all types of crazy stuff on the way home. Once I get home the Ativan mellows the hallucinations into something enjoyable, and I spend the rest of the weekend with playful hallucinations.
I can't really describe the fear of having special forces snipers aiming at you for two hours straight
Do You Know The Sound...?
GiphyAccidentally skipped a dose once and she came to school hysterical that didn't want to go back home. Heard someone chewing human meat under her bed.
Human meat.
How does one even know what that sounds like?
What's Not Real For You Is Real To Them
Had a patient with lewy body dementia. Not schizophrenia, but produced horrific hallucinations. I was working noc shift (10 p.m. to 6 a.m.) and my office was close to her room. She would scream and scream and scream all night long. I would go and sit with her and ask her if something was scaring her. She saw people waiting in the shadows in the corner of her room. She heard them laughing. Saw their faces contourting. She felt rats crawling up and down her body. She was still pretty with it and you were able to have lucid conversations with her. Had a sense of humor like you wouldn't believe. She knew what she was experiencing were hallucinations. But that didnt make them any less real to her. Eventually she stopped being able to discern what was real and what wasnt. She died a few months ago. I worked with her for two years and miss her every damn day.