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We've all had moments in our lives that we look back on and cringe at how much of a jerk we were. But not all of us are willing to share those stories online...
Here are some of the worst "dick move" moments people have either seen or done.
Many thanks to the Redditors who posed these questions. You can check out more answers from the sources at the end of this article!
We live in an era where online dating has become the norm. But people aren't always who and what they say they are. If you aren't familiar with the term 'catfish', it basically means luring someone into a relationship by pretending to be someone completely different through a fictional online persona.
Here are 10 creepy and bizarre catfish stories:
This article is based on the AskReddit question: "Online daters of Reddit, have you ever been the victim of a 'Catfish'? If so, how did you find out that they were lying?" Source can be found at the end of the article.
Let's face it we've all done things we'd rather our parents didn't find out about. Well these brave souls share some secrets they would NEVER tell their parents.
1/24. I shot myself in the leg when I was 8 and fixed the hole with a wad of toilet paper and some duct tape. There's still metal in there 20 years later.
2/24. As an adult I was visiting my Mom. She was divorced from her 2nd husband and at the time she had a "roommate". One day they were at work and I answered the phone in my Mom's bedroom since it was the closest phone to me at the time. I needed to take a message and opened the top drawer of the nightstand on instinct to find a piece of paper. Big mistake. Right on top was a double sided dildo, a Hustler magazine on top of a stack of Hustlers, and a love letter to her roommate. Trust me when I say that I only read the first sentence or so and put it back in the drawer. Here we are almost 20 years later, lives with a different woman now, she's never come out of the closet, I've never outed her and never will. It's her decision. I love her no matter what and I think I'll call her today because it's been a couple weeks.
3/24. My grandmother had a collection of fairly expensive rings and when she died she left one to every woman in the family. I was 13 and told not to wear mine out of the house because it was a bit loose on me. I did and lost it within a month of her death. Every now and then my mom asks about it and I'm just like "yeah it's in a box in one of my drawers, I don't wear it because I don't want to lose it."
4/24. Stole my dads car when I had no licence and then had to race him home so that I didn't get caught with it. Made it in time. I will never tell him this. Ever.
5/24. Less than a year after my brother bought his house (with considerable help from our parents), he and a friend were looking at a gun in his living room. Being young and careless, his buddy pulled the trigger, blowing a nice, big hole in the refrigerator our parents bought for bro. It was a nice fridge, too. After promptly sh*tting himself, he and the friend hauled a** to a local second-hand appliance store, and bought a reasonably similar-looking fridge, which stands in his kitchen to this day.
6/24. I didn't slip in the shower. I fell through the wall while my girlfriend and I were banging.
More confessions on the next page!
7/24. I used to play my game boy advanced every night for about 2 years, never told my parents and certainly don't plan on it.
8/24. When I was like 10-12 I threw a soccer trophy at my door during a tantrum. It put a hole in my side, but not all the way through.
I stuck a bumper sticker for my favorite college team over it.
I'm 28 and it's still there.
9/24. I stole my moms earrings to give to my girlfriend in 3rd grade. She never found out...
10/24. Burnt a portion of our fence down when I was 14 by putting out a cigarette on it. Told my parents it just spontaneously caught fire and I heroically helped our neighbour put out the fire before our house burned down.
11/24. When I was in primary school I was playing tag and thought it would be a good idea to go through the out-of-bounds area. Unfortunately there was a small rabbit hole or something that I tripped on and then fell and cut my forehead on a rock just on my hairline. Unaware of how bad the injury was, I just continued playing and at some point I ran past a teacher on duty and she said I had to go to the nurse (there was apparently blood dripping down my face). Turns out I had to get three stitches. Naturally, Worksafe were all over this sh*t. They had to know how something so serious could have occurred, and asked me to take them to where it happened. I was really scared and couldn't tell them I went out of bounds because I couldn't get in trouble. So I told them that I didn't really remember but would have a look anyway. Turns out that I found a bolt sticking out of a pole and blamed that. Worksafe audited the whole school and found several more, so we were not allowed outside at lunchtime until it was fixed. The only problem was that the people who came to fix it, couldn't start for a week. So every day for a week we were stuck in classrooms at lunch and recess time, all because of me. Still haven't told my parents.
More unbelievable stories on the next page!
12/24. I got lost in the woods hiking. The police had to rescue me. It was a whole big scene. I texted them with the little battery life I had on my phone and told them I was staying at a friends, so that they wouldn't worry. The police eventually found me, and I got home at 5AM. They thought I was at a friends, and I've never told them the story.
13/24. When I was 8 I used to like sleeping in my grandmas bed with her because she was over 90 and had the most comfortable bed in the universe. One night I peed the bed having one of those dreams where I pee during the dream (don't fall into the trap kids). When we woke up, my grandma was under the assumption that she had peed the bed and not me. I just acted like I was super understanding because of her old age. I'm sorry Mama Nene.
14/24. I put my foot through my bedroom door after I lost an online match on UFC 09. The guy kicked my a** and then pm'd me abuse so I went bezerk. I told my dad it was over a girl who faked pregnancy with me and that she was phoning me. Truth is I hadn't spoken to her in months and didn't want to admit it was over a video game.
15/24. That the month I was "living a month in Spain" was actually spent in jail. I had friends to post fake Instagram pictures for me too.
16/24. When my dad and I lived with his then fiance years ago, her oldest daughter and I used to fool around.
17/24. I skipped college for like 4 months.
I was studying to become an english translator. The first month there was so f*cking bad, I couldn't stand the subjects, and as I hadn't finished high school yet (exams left), I couldn't keep going to college anyway.
So I spent the next months pretending I was going to class, while actually taking really long bus trips back and forth and reading books near the river.
Its the douchiest thing I've done and I can't let my parents know.
18/24. My dad recently asked me how I paid for my college when he knows I don't have a job. I'm never going to tell him that I became a local drug lord for 24 months and moved hundreds of lbs of pot through frat houses and cashed out when I was free of student loans.
More unbelievable secrets on the next page!
19/24. When I was 13 and my little bro was 11, we stayed at the mall WAY past when we were supposed to come home, like a few hours. This was the time before cell phones.
On the way home we hatched a scheme. We devised a lie that involved us being detained by a mall security guard for running down a back hallway of the mall.
We even came up with a real person to base this security guard on, in case we were questioned separately. We pretty much described to our mom the pro wrestler Dean Malenko. It was perfect.
Little did we know, there was a guy in our area posing as a cop and abducting children. Mom called the cops. My brother and I separately had to give statements about what happened.
The thing is, the lie held up. The cops told Mom that there was a good chance this was the guy. IIRC there may have even been a little blurb in the news about a sighting of this guy at the mall we frequented.
We threw a wrench in an investigation, caused a minor local scare, scared the sh*t out of our Mom, and ruined our freedom to walk to the mall by ourselves for 6 months, all because we didn't want to get into trouble for being 3 hours late getting home.
20/24. I broke my moms waterbed having sex, the same night she came home really drunk and when she woke up in the morning, she thought she did and didn't remember.
21/24. When I was a junior in college, I lived off campus with five other guys in a shady neighborhood. One Tuesday night while a few of us were high and watching tv, a couple thugs busted our door, broke in, and robbed us at gunpoint. They were looking for a drug dealer. It turns out they had the wrong house; the dude from whom everyone at school bought their weed, coke, and pills lived one house over. (None of us ratted him out because that would've brought more trouble)
These guys tore our place apart looking for our nonexistent stash, and when they couldn't find anything, they grabbed some random worthless decorations, getting antsy to bounce. One of my roommates- big, burly, but usually reserved- grabbed one of the guys as they were leaving. He must've snapped. The thug turns around and lets two shots fly that both hit my friend: one in the leg, the other in the gut.
He lived but was in the hospital recuperating for a month. None of us were able to recover from what happened, so after the short, fruitless investigation was over, we withdrew from school and went home.
I stayed until the end of the semester. When I went home, I just told my parents that I wanted to transfer to a school closer to home. I never told them why I made that decision. I have two younger brothers. I didn't want my parents to be afraid to send them away to school; I didn't want my brothers to be afraid to leave home and explore.
22/24. I found their "home movie" when I was looking for something to enjoy alone...
23/24. My dog ate a whole pot cookie left out once. My mom thought the neighbor tried to poison my dog by throwing something in a Ziploc bag over the fence since the poor pup was falling over and 'fainting'. In reality the pup stole my Friday night from me.
24/24. I went on Disney channel's website without their permission. I'm gunna burn for that one.
Some people were more hesitant to share their most personal stories.
"Nice try mom."
Walker Lamond is the author of Rules for My Unborn Son, in which he brings us this collection of traditional, humorous, and urbane fatherly advice for boys.
1. There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs is not one of them.
2. Never cancel dinner plans by text message.
3. Dont knock it til you try it.
4. If a street performer makes you stop walking, you owe him a buck.
5. Always use we when referring to your home team or your government.
6. When entrusted with a secret, keep it.
7. DONT underestimate free throws in a game of HORSE.
8. Just because you can doesnt mean you should.
9. Dont dumb it down.
10. You only get one chance to notice a new haircut.
11. If youre staying more than one night, unpack.
12. Never park in front of a bar.
13. Expect the seat in front of you to recline. Prepare accordingly.
14. Keep a picture of your first fish, first car, and first girl/boyfriend.
15. Hold your heroes to a high standard.
16. A suntan is earned, not bought.
17. Never lie to your doctor.
18. All guns are loaded.
19. Dont mention sunburns. Believe me, they know.
20. The best way to show thanks is to wear it. Even if its only once.
21. Take a vacation from your cell phone, internet, and TV once a year.
22. Dont fill up on bread, no matter how good it is.
23. A handshake beats an autograph.
24. Dont linger in the doorway. In or out.
25. If you choose to go in drag, dont sell yourself short.
26. If you want to know what makes you unique, sit for a caricature.
27. Never get your haircut the day of a special event.
28. Be mindful of what comes between you and the Earth. Always buy good shoes, tires, and sheets.
29. Never eat lunch at your desk if you can avoid it.
30. When youre with new friends, dont just talk about old friends.
31. Eat lunch with the new kids.
32. When traveling, keep your wits about you.
33. Its never too late for an apology.
34. Dont pose with booze.
35. If you have right of way, TAKE IT.
36. You dont get to choose your own nickname.
37. When you marry someone, remember you marry their entire family.
38. Never push someone off a dock.
39. Under no circumstances should you ask a woman if she is pregnant.
40. Its not enough to be proud of your ancestry, live up to it.
41. Dont make a scene.
42. When giving a thank you speech, short and sweet is best.
43. Know when to ignore the camera.
44. Never gloat.
45. Invest in great luggage.
46. Make time for your mom on your birthday, Its her special day too.
47. When opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.
48. Sympathy is a crutch, never fake a limp.
49. Give credit. Take Blame.
50. Suck it up every now and again.
51. Never be the last one in the pool.
52. Dont stare.
53. Address everyone that carries a firearm professionally.
54. Stand up to bullies. Youll only have to do it once.
55. If youve made your point, stop talking.
56. Admit it when youre wrong.
57. If you offer to help dont quit until the job is done.
58. Look people in the eye when you thank them.
59. Thank the bus driver.
60. Never answer the phone at the dinner table.
61. Forgive yourself for your mistakes.
62. Know at least one good joke.
63. Dont boo. Even the ref is somebodys son.
64. Know how to cook one good meal.
65. Learn to drive a stick shift.
66. Be cool to younger kids. Reputations are built over a lifetime.
67. Its okay to go to the movies by yourself.
68. Dance with your mother/father.
69. Dont lose your cool. Especially at work.
70. Always thank the host.
71. If you dont understand, ask before its too late.
72. Know the size of your boyfriend/girlfriend's clothes.
73. There is nothing wrong with a plain t-shirt.
74. Be a good listener. Dont just take your turn to talk.
75. Keep your word.
76. In college always sit in the front. Youll stand out immediately. Come grade time it might come in handy.
77. Carry your mothers bags. She carried you for 9 months.
78. Be patient with airport security. They are just doing their job.
79. Dont be the talker in a movie.
80. The opposite sex likes people who shower.
81. You are what you do. Not what you say.
82. Learn to change a tire.
83. Be kind. Everyone has a hard fight ahead of them.
84. An hour with grandparents is time well spent. Ask for advice when you need it.
85. Dont litter.
86. If you have a sister, get to know her boyfriend. Your opinion is important.
87. You wont always be the strongest of fastest. But you can be the toughest.
88. Never call someone before or after 9 AM and 9PM.
89. Buy the orange properties in Monopoly.
90. Make the little things count.
91. Always wear a bra at work.
92. There is a fine line between looking sultry and slutty. Find it.
93. Youre never too old to need your mom.
94. Ladies, if you make the decision to wear heels on the first date commit to keeping them on and toning down how much your feet kill.
95. Know the words to your national anthem.
96. Your dance moves might not be the best, but I promise making a fool of yourself is more fun than sitting on the bench alone.
97. Smile at strangers.
98. Make Goals.
99. Being old is not dictated by your bedtime.
100. If you HAVE to fight, punch first and punch hard.
See more amazing work by Walker Lamond in his Blog, or find his book on Amazon.