I know that so many of ya'll love the chili at a certain fast food restaurant that rhymes with Bendy's, but that stuff's not fresh, okay.
Sorry to burst your bubble. It's a dark, dark secret I've carried inside me for over a decade.
After Redditor Themanfromjapan420 asked the online community, "What is your job keeping secret from customers?" people lined up to share some secrets of their own.
We are all such fools!
"Unbaked"
there's a popular overpriced deli/bakery, also part of a chain, in the rich area near where i live. people always say how "fresh" everything is, how "talented" the bakers are. i always thought their baked goods were dry af but i hadn't been there in years and was looking for a specific cake i knew they had. they accept custom orders but when i was ordering they said they couldn't put vanilla frosting on a chocolate cake???
I kept asking why and the worker kept dodging with a vague "we can't." quickly realized nothing they "bake" is actually made there and that's why their it's so damn dry it's nearly stale. no clue how the hell so many people think there's anything more than a massive fridge in their "kitchen" or why this place is so popular.
"Just Normal"
Giphy
I work for a printing company. The amount of jobs that we print that say "printed on recycled paper" and it is just normal paper is astronomical.
"Come on In"
We all know you are high/screwed on some drug. We don't just don't care if you can behave.
Nightclub owner.
If anything, I imagine it's good for business because f*cked up people aren't paying attention to the rate at which they're annihilating money.
"Serving 2%"
I worked at an incredibly under stocked coffee shop once. If someone asked for whole milk I was told by management to tell them we had it, then serve them 2%. Then one day I served a milk farmer. I've never been called out on my crap as fast as the damn milk man himself.
"All the Same"
Our residential and commercial model are the same thing just marketed and priced differently.
But when a person asks what the difference is, we get told to just pull crap out of our butt.
"stronger cooling fans, better waterproofing, stronger locks, better dust filters"
I basically just name all the features and say they're better... 😅
That's disgusting and will probably just surprise them.
"Security"
Giphy
I work in a Hotel, and at least in this Hotel our security is crap. I don't wear any id or uniform that proves that I'm actually an employee and can go in and out everytime i want to. So, that means that ANYONE can come and get in the hotel without problem at ANY TIME.
"Phone Plans"
Phone plans are significantly less expensive that what we quote you a lot of the time. TPR wants us to sell you as much literal useless junk as possible that you would not ever agree to paying for, so they make us bundle it in so you don't even think about it. It's pretty shady, but I also got a kid to feed, definitely still searching for better.
"Bubbles"
Giphy
There's actually no difference between a $300 champagne room and a $150 private dance. We're supposed to say it's more private etc, but it's the exact same just with a different price tag.
"The Dealership"
I used to work as a mechanic in a dealership. Women would accuse us of taking advantage of them constantly. Truth is, if a woman would come in for a problem and we caught another, if we could just fix it, we would and the customer would be none the wiser. In fact, if there was a problem we could correct without a part or a great deal of time, we just did regardless.
"Hotel Visit"
I used to be an in city truck driver. And id often deliver to hotels. You can pretty much just walk freely through most hotels, even in the kitchens and back rooms. There's actually lot of places you can just walk freely through, even just in street clothes. If you act like you belong, no one stops you. Sometimes if i had to take my lunch break at a delivery, id throw a flannel shirt over my work shirt and then a safety vest and just walk around with a clipboard in my hand. I got to see a lot of cool places and only got stopped once.
"Trashed"
I worked for a grocery store who made a big song and dance about their "new green initiatives" and had large recycling bins in all our departments, assuring the customers that we were doing awesome!
Then at the end of the night we would just chuck everything in the trash compactor.
"Moving Parts"
Giphy
I work in manufacturing and we make parts for companies like Ford, GM, Mercedes etc. Not gonna lie after working in this career I'm surprised most people's car parts and just falling apart with the amount of crap we know that's wrong but we need to meet orders so we send it out anyways.
"Pay Out"
I work for an insurance company so we kind of have to be honest with our customers. But there are a lot of times when claims don't get paid due to an internal issue. You can't just say there's an unfixable problem with the system and that you don't know how long it'll take to get fixed. All we can say is that it's been looked at and should be fixed soon.
"I loved working in geriatrics"
I worked in a long term care home.... I loved working in geriatrics, I still do. I no longer work at this home.... Residents paid $84.00 a day to live in a home that was A) right across from a hospital but the nurses didn't want to send them because they didn't want to pay an ambulance fee. A man died of a brain aneurysm when he was showing symptoms of distress but didn't want to pay for the ambulance that drove them across the street B) if they were short staffed they would serve meals on styrofoam plates because they didn't want to stay late or leave dishes for the next day C) Last straw (then I quit) there was a power outage within this two story facility.... all locked doors opened.... all lights shut off, all elevators stopped working because there was NO backup generator....
I 10000% called the ministry of health and safety to let them know and they told me there were so many violations.... one hour and thirty minutes of discussing this hell hole I'll never get back. PAY ATTENTION TO WHERE YOU SEND YOUR LOVE ONES 💗 PS I do cognitive support with seniors now within an amazing home!
"Shotty Work"
I work in reliability. It's my job to be aware of exactly how sh*tty our suppliers are, and how many end user failures we can expect because of it (there's always an acceptable amount of failures).
So it's okay that your manufacturing is crappy. If companies wanted higher quality manufacturing, they would pay more for it (but they don't, always cutting costs).
"Lost $$$"
Giphy
My boss makes ZERO profit from tobacco/JUUL. If we under order from our distributor and need to get cartons from someplace else, he LOSES money. When we increase our price it's to satisfy the state minimum. He sells tobacco and milk at zero or negative profit so you walk in the door, counting on you to buy other items at 150-200% markup because you're already in there. Milk and tobacco sell themselves, and 50-75% of our customer base buys more than just those two items.
"Fraud"
I worked for Fortune 500 company where my manager deliberately charged customers for hours I didn't work.
Indeed that is good ole' fraud.
"repacking"
Used to work at a private liquor store. We used to spend evenings of beer order days "repacking" the beer using a manual machine of sorts that made both 6 and 8 packs. The rings would come on a big perforated spindle that could be separated with ease after each pair of rings. It was possible to buy 6 packs, but the company saved so much money buying extra 24/36/48 packs for staff to break down into smaller packs.
"All for the $$$"
Giphy
In a lot of cases you can get a college degree for way less than most Universities try to charge. This doesn't really apply to careers where certain prestige or accreditations are required. But in a lot of cases state colleges and even guidance counselors at high schools condition kids or even some adults into thinking that they need to spend a fortune on 4 years at one school to get a degree. The guidance counselors do it because the more of the students go on to a 4 year school, the better the HS looks. The colleges do it because $$$$$$.
"Up in the Air"
Flight attendant.
It is part of my UNIFORM that I carry paperclips 'in case the flap that releases masks doesn't open'. (meaning I could die). It's good to know that the plane that houses 300 passengers is so poorly built that their life could depend on a paper clip that they don't even carry.
"Choke Out"
I worked at a pet store where the grooming salon killed someone's dog. The groomer put it in a hold to clip its nails and choked the dog out. Two workers walked by and commented about how they didn't think it was a good way to restrain the dog.
The general manager told the owner the dog had a stroke. No one was supposed to talk about it. The poor girl tried to give the dog CPR, which was against company policy. She quit shortly after.
"Be Polite"
We hate when customers change their minds on products and leave them scattered at the front end instead of letting us know and hand it to us. We don't mind if you change your mind we just get annoyed that people are too afraid to ask. Its not the end of the world that they don't want a basket or a case of soda.
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"Members Not Only"
You don't actually need to be a member to get in.
I know at Sam's Club, you don't necessarily need a membership to come inside. But you do need a membership card to actually purchase anything.
"Third Party Issues"
I work for a worker's comp third party administrator, so while not an adjuster we're the middleman for the adjuster and most injured workers don't really know the difference. It doesn't bring me any joy to tell people they're denied or tell them their authorization is still pending after 3 weeks.
Some of that comes down to crappy or unresponsive adjusters, but the biggest issue is usually the doctors.
I have to explain multiple times a day to patients that we would be happy to approve their medical treatment, but everything is on hold because the referring physician didn't: fill out the form, filled out the wrong form, left required areas blank, put the wrong body part/diagnosis (this happens with alarming frequency), didn't sign it, didn't specify a quantity for something, didn't submit supporting medical notes, and refuses to answer our calls, our fax requests, our emails, the adjuster's calls and emails, their employer's calls, and the bat signal we sent up.
"System is Updating."
When someone in IT screws up a software system and we need to get it running again, we just put up a message on the login screen that says:
System is Updating.
That sounds much better than:
The IT guy screwed up, so your system that you pay monthly fees for is down. We are scrambling to fix it.
"shouldn't you be shocking them?!"
Giphy
Contrary to popular belief, you CANNOT, I repeat, you CANNOT defibrillate someone who has flat lined. Those are only used to regulate abnormal rhythms such as ventricular fibrillation. If someone has flatlined, you do compressions and push drugs to help get some form of pulse back.
Source: was an EMT, now medical student. You'll be surprised how many people ask "shouldn't you be shocking them?!"
"Yelped"
Despite being the 2018 #1 Restaurant on Yelp, they heat up their meat for their sandwiches & cook eggs inside a microwave. Glad I don't work there anymore. The family isn't as nice & friendly as they portray themselves on social media.
"Wino"
Giphy
I'm a bar back at a winery, if we say we're out of a particular wine, we're not, there's like 15 boxes of it in the basement.
"basic borders"
Back when I worked at Borders they told us if we suspected someone was shoplifting that we should approach them and ask if they needed help finding anything. It was supposed to make them think twice about stealing and maybe put back what they were taking since it made them feel like they were gonna get busted.
"Climb Every Shelf"
Sometimes the load of new merchandise completely blocks access to the backstock shelves. It takes time to work through the load and get it all onto the sales floor/on the backstock shelves.
If that is the case, and you ask "if we have any more in the back", the answer will be no - even if we actually do have your item in backstock.
No one is going to climb through the load to find what you're asking for. Come back on a different day and see if it's on the shelf then.
"Gagging"
Back when i worked in a deli at a very well known grocery/retail store all across america i found the most hideous displays of food safety violations. This included a tub filled with chicken water (bits of cooked chicken and grease that came off racks that were soaked in water) that hadn't been changed in over 4 months. The smell alone almost knocked me out while i hard core gagged. This was where we stored racks to cook rotisserie chickens on without cleaning the racks before we reused them.
Showed my manager and she said she was "working on it". Cue this for another few months (me asking whenever i saw her to tell me how to fix it) and she was always "working on it" and "don't worry". I quit due to that and many other violations that weren't being fixed and moved to another retail/grocery chain located in the midwest. Much cleaner deli.
"won't sell kittens or puppies"
Giphy
The cats at our store might be from reputable rescues, but the hamsters/lizards/etc we sell sure as sh!t come from animal mills.
Kind of screwed up for a business that spouts how wonderful they are because they "won't sell kittens or puppies" because of the issue with mills.
"Dumpster Queen"
I work for a Dairy Queen and well it's not as bad as some other places but well if you liked fast food you wouldn't after seeing what goes on in that kitchen. I've seen just about everything food that's been dropped on the floor be served, sour milk in one of the machines, lettuce soooo old it turned into a soup, dumping of fry grease into the dumpster.
"The Menu Lies"
I worked for a fancy country club who bought their food from Walmart. I also saw frozen stuff like Stouffers lasagna. A LOT of stuff wasn't fresh at all. A lot of stuff was made, then frozen and then reheated later. I bet if the members found out they'd be freaking pissed!
"filth"
Giphy
We only clean the restrooms on Mondays... It's a school... But small and it's cleaned well I promise don't worry I definitely do my job well.
"1 accident at a time"
Fast food: We drop crap on the floor all the time. The pizza box, a chicken wing, the hot pan grabber. It all just gets picked up, put into the fryer for a moment, or run under the faucet for a second and put right back into use. Diversifying microbiomes 1 accident at a time.
"I worked at a deli/coffee shop..."
I worked at a deli/coffee shop that was part of a local chain. Most of the baked goods arrive frozen and half-baked, and half the soup is day-old.
"I worked in the infant room..."
I worked in the infant room at a day care and I saw so many kids take their first steps. We were supposed to lie through our teeth about this. We would tell the parents their kids were getting close and to keep the camera ready.
We had a new girl who refused to lie about this and allowed a little girl to walk to her mom at pick up. I saw that mom weeping in the parking lot when my shift ended a few minutes later.
A lot of parents deal with a lot of guilt over putting their kids in daycare. If the parents feel like they're missing important milestones it can be really hard. So we just let them have it.
"I've worked at..."
Giphy
I've worked at two different restaurants that advertised "fresh squeezed orange juice" on the menu, but it was really Minute Maid from a dispenser.
"Back when I worked..."
Back when I worked for a rather popular clothing store, here in the UK. Customers would come into the store on Christmas Eve and ask if the items they wanted to buy would be cheaper in the boxing day sales. We had to say we didn't know, and wouldn't know until head office sends us the price lists after the store closes on Christmas eve.
The truth is, we knew a week in advance what the sale prices would be. We could even check the sale prices whenever we wanted. In fact, when you ask a member of staff to check if they have other sizes im stock, they would scan the barcode on the shop floor. Using a handheld scanner to check the stock they had in the store room.
Right there on that scanner, they have the current price, future sale prices, and any promotional offers on that item. As well as a list of every available size the item comes in and how much stock they have.
Management would tell us to keep future sale prices secret so the store could reach monetary sales targets.
"I used to work..."
I used to work at a well known pizza place and most of the time I worked in the back answering phones and washing dishes and every time I made a order we always add coupons just to be nice even if they're being a big pain. We would add one or two coupons.
"Retail here."
Retail here. At least at the company I work for (and to the extent of my knowledge), nothing.
From my vantage point, customers inexplicably think we're hiding something, when we're actually not.
"The same store..."
Giphy
I used to have a small side job at a billion dollar chain grocery store. Every few hours they would say "Attention associates, recycling is now open" over the loudspeaker. There was no recycling. It just meant someone had the door to the outside trash cans open.
The same store also hourly played a recording of 2 separate voices saying "Security, please check section 3" over the loudspeaker. There was no security.
"We know..."
Worked at a dentist for a few years. We know when you've completely neglected your oral hygiene for the past six months and tried to fool us by flossing five minutes before you walk in the door. We might not say it, but we know.
"Ask for an employee..."
Ask for an employee to run an analysis of your wireless phone bill. Ended up saving my parents $45 a month.
Buying a home is a daunting task, but it comes with the comfort of finally having a place to call your own after the lengthy process of purchasing.
One of the things new homeowners look forward to is renovating certain areas of their newly acquired domicile.
However, embarking on this next phase of making a home their own can come with some surprises.
For example, doing a gut reno in the basement or tearing down a non-load-bearing wall can unearth unusual relics left from the previous homeowner.
These discoveries can either be treasures, or something very unpleasant.
Curious to hear from new homeonwers, Redditor Oblivious_Dude14 asked:
"People who bought a house. What is the weirdest thing you have found left by the previous owner?"
These will spark curiosity about former occupants.
Hidden Message
"First time I took a hot shower in our new home. The steam covered the mirror, only to reveal the phrase 'HELLO, I SEE YOU' in large finger drawn writing."
"It freaked me out for a second, but made me laugh soon after that."
"It was such an inconspicuous yet obvious thing to leave for the new homeowner (me)."
– Individual-Common-89
A Special Request
"It's not really weird but I think it's kind of a nice story."
"One of the kids' rooms has a shelf going all around the top edge, and when my kid was putting stuff up there they found a letter from the previous kid. The letter welcomed them to the room etc and asked them to take special care of a rose bush in the front yard that was their special rose bush. My kid thought it was really cool to have that connection with the previous kid."
– catsaway9
Instructions
"Not really weird but they left a typed out and printed note about the house and how to take care of it. Detailing all the plant life in the backyard and how to prep for the winter. Described how to take care of the hot tub and gave random tid bits about the electrical."
"They were good people lol."
– pet_zulrah
Theses secret chambers piqued Redditors' curiosity.
Secret Dwelling
"Not my house, but the school my friend worked at."
"A pipe had leaked and ruined a wall in the building, one of the oldest schools in the city. It was a beautiful property. Anyways the pipe leaked so they pulled down the ruined wall and behind the wall found a door."
"A fully furnished apartment was there. Had a coal burning stove to heat it. Early 1900s appliances and decor. It was for the caretaker of the school."
– Used-Stress
Antique Showroom
"My ex-wife's family knocked down a wall in a 400-year-old house in Cornwall, and found a perfectly intact bedroom from the 1800s, still with all the personal effects where they had been left."
"Nobody knows why it was boarded up, or why things weren't taken out of it."
"Oh, and that house always appears in the guides for the most haunted locations in Cornwall, if you believe that kind of stuff."
– ledow
A Medieval Theme
"A basement room that was fully decked out as a 'dungeon.' Faux stone walls, a stocks (like where you lock your head and hands in ala ye olde England), candle scones on the walls, a metal-barred cage in the corner from floor to ceiling. Oh and the closet had a load of toys, some normal, some....not so typical."
– DisIsDaeWae
These Redditors got a glimpse into past lives.
Family Treasure
"Before I met her, my wife got a call from someone she worked with saying they'd just bought an old house and in the city, and in it was a steamer trunk with her family name (not a common one) carved into the woodwork on one end."
"As it turns out, it was the trunk that her great grandfather used when he came over from Germany, and it made the trip to my wife's hometown when he met her great grandmother on a visit, and subsequently moved to her city to marry her. We now have it and it's full of family portraits and albums."
– LateralThinkerer
Vintage Trickster
"My first house purchase in 2005 - bought an old farmhouse that was built in 1923. The basement was FILLED with crap - we told them they needed to clean it all out before closing, but they didn't do it. The realtor asked if we wanted to postpone closing, and we decided no - some of the stuff looked interesting enough. Maybe it will be worthwhile to go through."
"Most of it was just junk. Then, about half way through (we were working our way from one end of the basement to the other, because you could barely walk through), I went to pick up what I thought was a small box, only to quickly realize it weighed at least 75 pounds. Upon further inspection, it wasn't a box, but a wooden square, 4' wide and about 12'x12', with two thin masonite plywood covers on each side. On one edge were two bolts with wires coming off that had been cut."
"Very strange - had no idea what it was, but thought it was interesting. So I put it aside and we kept going. At the very back of the basement once we cleared everything else out, was a rickety gray cabinet, built into the house. Inside, were numerous strange small tools, vials of mercury, vials of a strange powder, and thousands - literally thousands - of dice blanks. Some actual dice, but mostly blanks without the dots. they were all in little boxes labeled 'dice blanks'. Also very strange..."
"Not too long after that, I met a guy and upon learning my address, he said 'can I come over?My best friend grew up in that house'. He came by, and proceeded to tell me stories for an hour and a half about his childhood best friends eccentric father: Someone who was a part of the 'Dixieland Mafia' in the 60s and 70s, and who made a living traveling around the US as a traveling gambler. The enormously heavy box was an electro-magnet. And the dice blanks were for him to make his own loaded dice with a little bit of metal powder under the inlaid dot, so he could set up his own table with the the electromagnet underneath, and turn it on when he wanted to persuade the dice. He told me many other stories, including that there was 'no doubt in his mind that he had killed someone'. Pretty fascinating."
– GIjokinaround
A Soldier's Story
"A diary of an American soldier in WW-II, South Pacific Theater. Found it above a door when remodeling 20+ years ago. My wife and I tried everything we could think of to find a descendant, but to no avail."
"UPDATE: I just posted photos of it with the person's ID info on r/WorldWar2."
"Last Update: Thanks to all the help from this community, and those at r/worldwar2, this diary is now in the hands of its writer's son who came to my office this morning to retrieve it. I am so thrilled to have been able to facilitate this!"
– Factsaretheonlytruth
These folks really hit the jackpot.
Forgotten Stash
"$1200 in cash above the door on the inside the closet. I found it while painting."
– whymetoo
They Don't Make 'Em Like They Used To
"A glass bowl. It was kind of pretty, with horizontal blue stripes."
"We kept fruit in it. We thought about dropping it off at the local charity shop, but never got around to it."
"Then one day I was at an antique fair and I saw for sale glass bowls that looked almost identical to ours. I went home to get my bowl and brought it to be assessed."
"Turns out it was a vintage Orrefors crystal bowl. The assessor valued it at around $800."
"We no longer keep fruit in it."
– khendron
When my great aunt passed away, our family went over to her and her husband's home in Pomona, CA to clear it out in preparation to sell.
They emigrated from Japan in the late 1930s and brought with them many decorative figurines, sculptures, and wooden carvings from the homeland.
One of the pieces was a kabuki doll on a wooden base. As we were placing the item in a box, a tiny envelope that had been taped underneath the doll's base came loose.
I opened it and found what looked like instructions for something. I kick myself to this day that I didn't keep the letter and never bothered asking my parents what the note said as we were frantically trying to empty the house.
But man, my imagination ran wild. Was it a treasure map? Who knows. I still wonder to this day what the note said and tossing it aside remains one of my life's greatest regrets.
Reddit user mariababexoxo asked:
"'Never confuse education with intelligence; you can have a PhD and still be an idiot,' stated Richard Feynman. What are some real-life examples of this?"
Chemical Engineer
"I had an intern with a PhD once. She was trying to be a chemical process engineer. VERY book smart."
"I spent the Summer teaching her how to use basic tools like screwdrivers and wrenches for simple tasks like opening containers and adjusting clamps. She had zero practical skills and couldn’t figure anything whatsoever out on her own."
"She’d get lost in a building and call me and I’d tell her to find the exit, but she’d get lost inside and we’d have to go in and get her. This routinely happened, and she would just find somewhere random and sit until we collected her."
"When her car’s GPS lost signal once she didn’t know what to do so she stopped in the middle of the road and texted me where she was and that there was something wrong with her car and to come help. I figured there was a breakdown or something based on the text and drove out to check on it because she wasn’t responding."
Giphy"She was crying sitting on the side of the road and a cop was yelling at her to move her car which was still in the lane."
"If you told her to pick something up from a store she’d ask where it was and if you didn’t know, she would never find it "She refused to ask an employee because she knew they weren’t as smart as she was."
"She’d just walk in random directions looking for things. For example if you said 'go to Walmart and find some work boots because you lost yours' she would send me pictures of random aisles in Walmart with 'is this close? which way from here?'.”
"Book smart but utterly dim."
~ captainofpizza
It's The Milk That Makes Them Healthy
"My wife once had a roommate who was working on her PhD."
"At one point she went on an Oreo diet because they're vegan."
"She was later surprised to find her health wasn't improving."
~ educational_palmeira
GiphySquirrel!
"I am a graduate student at the University of Oxford."
"I recently had to explain to another grad student the concept of animals hibernating. She's British and English is her first language, so it wasn't a vocabulary issue. She just didn't know that animals did that."
"When I explained it she said 'Oh! like squirrels!' Squirrels actually don't hibernate, but I just nodded."
~ slider501
Have You Tried Turning It Off...
"Ask literally anyone who's ever worked for a university's IT department. I've never met a group of people more unwilling to learn anything new—outside of their small specialization—than university professors."
"These people would rather argue with you for 10 minutes that 'I did restart my computer' than just spend the 2 minutes to restart the computer when the logistics software is showing the machine with a 45 day uptime and all of us can see that sh*t."
"Department heads do this."
~ Mammoth_Clue_5871
GiphyIt's One Banana, Michael
"My roommate in college was/is an academic genius, 35 ACT in med school right now."
"I brought him to Walmart with me because he wanted to buy an 8-pack of Gatorade. At the self checkout he scanned one, saw the price was 7 bucks, and decided that must have been the price for EACH Gatorade."
"He ended up scanning the pack 7 more times and paid 56 bucks for some Gatorade, all while thinking that was a fair price."
~ Royal-Character-2035
And Vampirism!
"The nurse I used to work with during the pandemic was constantly bragging about how rich and important and highly educated she was.
"Only for her to suggest to our director of nursing that the kitchen start putting extra garlic in everyone's meals because garlic cures COVID."
~ GlassPeepo
GiphyHistory ≠ Geography
"I know someone with a PhD in History who went to the Caribbean with only long trousers and jumpers/sweaters to wear."
"He was so hot he had to cut his jeans down to shorts."
"Then, as part of the same trip, he went to Washington DC, and had to wear jean shorts the whole time because he cut up all his trousers."
~ RexEverything_
And On The 7th Day...
"I met a PhD molecular biologist who was an evolution denier. I found out years later that he was somewhat infamous."
~ whittlingcanbefatal
"I’ve met two PhD students who worked on bacterial evolution and one who worked in biochemistry."
"All three believed that human evolution was not a thing, all three were religious."
~ D-g-tal-s_purpurea
GiphyNobel Disease
"There are a ton of laureates that go conspiratorial batsh*t later in life."
~ hacktheself
"Kary Mullis is the worst one and he really emboldens other conspiracy theorists."
"He won the Nobel prize for helping invent the PCR test... then he denied AIDS existed while in a government position leading to 330,000 deaths and said climate change wasn't real because his astrologer told him so."
"Oh, and ghosts."
"Anti-vaxxers love him."
~ AstonVanilla
Members Around The World
"Heard about a mechanical engineer who is a flat earther."
"So yeah, him, or any engineer, physicist, or astronomer that believes in that."
"The fact that a single one can get their degree and then turn around years later and believe in something fundamentally incompatible with the BASIC physics required to make sense of their degree is baffling."
~ QuanticWizard
GiphyWhat Did They Do With The Couch?
"Helped some mates move house. One was a Uni Student doing a double degree in Computer Science and something else very challenging."
"While we were packing boxes he asked if he could could borrow a saw. When I asked why, it was so he could shorten the legs on the dining table so it would fit out the door."
"The look on his face when I grabbed one of the legs and started unscrewing it was priceless. As was the look when I asked him how he thought they got it in the room in the first place."
~ cruiserman_80
New-Fangled Gadgets
"In my old university in Germany in the early 2000s. The university was old, really old."
"And when I started they just began modernising the lecture halls etc... The German department got a new, fancy, state of the art lecture hall with any kind of technology you could wish for."
"The professors got extensive training on how to use it."
"There were some of them who after three months still didn’t know how to switch on the lights. Don’t even talk about the microphone or how to open and close the blinds on the skylight."
They didn’t originally plan on having an old-fashioned overhead projector there, but after a few weeks they relented and provided one because the professors didn’t know any other way."
"In their defence, the other lecture halls were so old that they still had the hole for the ink well in the tables."
~ moosmutzel81
GiphyDo No Harm
"I work in mental health and have known sooo many healthcare professionals with advanced degrees who I wouldn’t trust to take care of a goldfish and can’t believe counsel people on a regular basis."
~ DeadSharkEyes
What's That Burning Smell?
"My MIT PhD. friend complained his dryer was taking forever to dry his clothes."
"I asked him if he was cleaning the lint trap—'it doesn't have one'."
"Spoiler alert: it did have one, way in the back and I took out a sweater's worth of lint."
~ arbiterror
GiphyIt's Not Rocket Science...
I chuckle whenever someone uses this saying to indicate something isn't complex like rocket science ever since my friend became an aeronautical engineer.
Why?
Well, we'd have to go back to the mid-1980s when we were both teenagers in high school. As many teens with cars in rural America did, my friends liked to drive around on the back roads as a form of entertainment.
One sunny, Summer day two of my friends came to visit me with a tale to tell.
It seems they were driving on a stretch of road with a speed limit of 35mph [56kph] because of a cluster of homes and farms. When the car slowed to this speed, Mr. Future Rocket Scientist looked down at the pavement passing by below his window on the passenger side.
Upon studying the passing blacktop for several moments, he came to the conclusion he could easily run as fast as the car was moving, so...
...he undid his seatbelt, opened the car door and STEPPED OUT of the moving car.
According to the driver, one moment our friend was sitting next to him and the next he was gone. Or mostly gone.
After a brief moment of panic during which he slowed then stopped the car, he noticed Mr. Future Rocket Scientist's right hand gripping the door's armrest and his left hand gripping the side of the passenger seat.
He was probably only dragged for a few seconds which wasn't long enough to do more than scuff up his jeans, jean jacket and the toes of his shoes.
He escaped with only minor road rash and a few bruises.
After the driver told me what happened from his perspective, Mr. Future Rocket Scientist interjected:
"It worked!"
"I was doing really well until I tripped over that rock."
Luckily an understanding of things like velocity, speed, trajectory, friction, drag, inertia and gravity aren't needed for aeronautics.
GiphyNeedless to say, we've never let him forget his "experiment."
He still claims the only problem was that rock on the road.
And I now use the saying "it's not rocket surgery" instead of either of the original sayings.
Reddit user juliacorco asked:
"What is the creepiest tv episode or movie you’ve ever seen?"
Haunting of Hill House
"Haunting of Hill House on Netflix."
"Scary as hell."
"Bent Neck Lady makes the hair on my neck stand up on end every time."
"Same with the ghost looking for his hat. Or whatever was down in the cellar."
~ Pretend-Cucumber-711
GiphyHereditary
"Hereditary"
"That one scene near the end in the dark bedroom…is essentially a reverse jump scare. Something is there the entire time and it’s just a matter of when you notice."
"Sent chills up my spine."
"That movie stuck with me for days."
~ Plus-Statistician80
Doctor Who/Torchwood
"I have two contenders, from the Doctor Who universe..."
"'Blink' from Doctor Who."
"'Children of the Earth' from Torchwood (all 5 episodes)."
"Both are the stuff of nightmares, but in very different ways."
"'Blink' will make you not sleep at night, while 'Children of the Earth' will deeply disturb you."
~ Common_Sense_Dudd
Giphy"The first few seconds I was exposed to the Weeping Angels in 'Blink' I thought it was a dumb, silly conceit."
"By the end of that episode I knew I would have nightmares for months."
~ codyish
"'Children of Earth' was amazing. There was so much complexity to it, and the way they solved it was downright horrifying."
"The 456 just felt so real with their motives, and were really dark compared to other Who-niverse villains."
"It wasn't that they were trying to build a galactic highway, or were trying to save the universe. Just that (SPOILERS) they were drug dealers/addicts and would kill millions if the didn't get their supply of children."
~ NinjaBreadManOO
Paranormal Activity
"Paranormal Activity."
"I was not prepared and only 12 years old."
"Traumatized for years!"
~ Sudden-Star-7190
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode 'Hush'."
~ Malk_McJorma
"The gentlemen were some of the best villains."
~ Sudden-Star-7190
Room 1408
"Room 1408 creeped me out."
"I usually don't find hauntings or ghosts scary, but this one was something else."
"Left me really uneasy when trying to sleep after."
"I had to keep a light on. I'm 46."
~ hartschale666
The Twilight Zone
"I find the The Twilight Zone episode titled 'Living Doll' to be particularly creepy."
~ Ill_Fisherman5547
"Talky Tina was so creepy."
~ peachesfordinner
"The Twilight Zone episode—'Mirror Image'—with the woman at the bus station who has a doppelganger still creeps the sh*t out of me."
~ BurningSlash88
Ghost Ship
"Opening scene from Ghost Ship."
~ teslatinkering
"This movie is 21 years old, I’ve only watched it once and I still remember this scene vividly."
"Props to the creators because I can’t say that about many movies."
~ PainfulPoo411
X-Files
"The X-Files."
"Episodes 'Home'—inbred family in Pennsylvania—and 'The Host'—the Flukeman."
~ True-Mousse4957
"I was going to say season 3, episode 12—'War of the Coprophages'."
"Only due to one little thing."
"Mulder is in a lab with some scientist looking at the weird cockroaches. They're just chatting away when a cockroach walks across 'your' TV screen."
"It's made to look like it's an actual cockroach walking across your in real life screen. We don't even have cockroaches like that in my region of the world, but it still freaked me out for a second."
~ STROKER_FOR_C64
The Blair Witch Project
"Not gonna lie."
"I saw The Blair Witch Project in the theatre after watching some MTV documentary on it the day before."
"I thought it was real and I was afraid to walk to my car."
~ heavymetalsculpture
Are You Afraid of the Dark
"There's an episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark—'The Tale of the Dead Man's Float'."
"It's about a school that was built on an old cemetary and there is some sort of creature thing thant comes into the pool while some kids are swimming."
"I still think about that episode every so often."
~ streetsoulja31
"There’s that one episode—'The Tale of the Frozen Ghost'—where a kid froze to death at some point and the ghost kid just appears and says 'I’m cold' in such a weird inflection…."
"It still creeps me out now. And whenever I am cold, that’s the only way I can say it in my head."
"Man that series had no business being that scary!!"
~ mistresssweetjuice
GiphyFor me, children in horror can always produce the creepiness factor.
Who doesn't feel unsettled after seeing the twins in The Shining?
So what movies or TV episodes creeped you out?
