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People Share The Worst Justifications For Cheating On Their Significant Other

People Share The Worst Justifications For Cheating On Their Significant Other

People Share The Worst Justifications For Cheating On Their Significant Other

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Y'all grab yourselves a bottle of whatever and a cookie. Some people will use any reason and I mean... ANY reason to dabble outside of a relationship. FYI... there is no viable excuse to betray your significant other but... I'm listening! But BYE FELICIA!!

Redditor FuschiaDinosaur wondered What's the worst excuse you've heard to justify cheating?

YOUR MEMORY NEEDS A BEAT DOWN.

"You weren't around and she reminded me of you so you should feel flattered"

THEN JSUT SAY SEX ONLY! NO JUDGEMENT.

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"I'm young and don't want to be tied down to somebody".

That's fine, but instead of cheating on somebody who thinks you actually care about them, specify that you're not looking for anything serious to begin with.

OH PLEASE!

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"I felt like I wasn't good enough for you"

PARDON ME CRAZY?

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"Just because you've made me so happy, happier than any other guy, doesn't mean I should stay with you any longer."

ACCIDENTS "DON'T" HAPPEN!!

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"It was an accident."

Moron. You don't just get naked, crawl into bed, and screw five or six times.

I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU! LOL

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"I relapsed." Lol right. Turns out she relapsed a lot.

STICK WITH THE CLASSICS.

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"One thing led to another"

STOP BLAMING YOUR PARENTS!

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My dad did it and its in my genes.

MAYBE TALK TO YOUR PARTNER? DUH!

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Buddy to me -"Dude... I just can't do my wife like I do my girlfriend. I respect my wife too much to do that."

SERIOUSLY?

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"I didn't think the Konami code would work irl."

AHHH THE CLASSICS PART 2.

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"I was really drunk"

SO IT'S ME. SORRY? YOU... $#$$%^^%$#$%

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"You were depressed." Gee well now I'm over the moon.

GOOD FOR YOU. BYE!

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I had the opportunity to.... So I took it.

WELL LET ME GET MY PASSPORT!!

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"I was in a totally different country."

MY FAVORITE!!!

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We were on a break!!

DON'T BE A TAYLOR SWIFT SONG.

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Girlfriend's ex-roommate was notorious for this:

"My ex cheated on me."

"I'm a different person now."

"Practically broken up." After she slept with her now former bestie's soon-to-be ex and said bestie asked her to tell the truth.

"We're not that serious or in love."

"I don't see it going anywhere, you guys wouldn't understand." After we asked her why she was sleeping with another guy when she was still in a committed relationship.

Bonus points for gf's mom outing her cheating in front of him by accident, while he was about to help move her (the cheater's) stuff to another city.

WHO AM I? WHERE AM I?

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"That's not who I am, I am going through a ton of stuffright now, so I wasn't myself". Wtf does that have to do with anything?

SOME PEOPLE NEED TO A GOOD SMACK!!! OR SIX!

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"Yes I have been cheating on my boyfriend, but look at him, he is too ugly to be loved. So I told him either he accepts that I will have sex with other people, or I will dump him and he will never have a girlfriend again."

And that was the moment I realized I was no longer friends with her.

For the record, he broke with her two years later but only after she took a lot of money from his disability checks. He is dating a much nicer (and beautiful) girl now.

SORRY... IT'S YOU!

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"You're obviously not doing something right."

BEAT YOU!!! I WIN?

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"I think he might cheat since we're long distance until (two months from that day). If he cheats on me, I'll be devastated. So I want to cheat on him first. That way if he ever tells me he cheated on me during this time, I can tell him I cheated first to piss him off. I mean he might not cheat, but if he does, I need to be able to tell him I cheated first."

IT'S OK... I'LL STRANGLE YOU WITH MY SHOELACES!

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"I tripped!"

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Katy Perry, P!nk, Paul McCartney And More Sign Letter Threatening To Boycott SiriusXM Radio
Photos by John Shearer-Direct Management-Christopher Polk-Gary Gershoff-WireImage

Hundreds of artists have signed a letter threatening a boycott if SiriusXM's parent company, Liberty Media, doesn't back down from opposing the Music Modernization Act.

The act, which was expected to pass through Congress, streamlines royalty payments in the new age of digital technology, but it seems SiriusXM is objecting to a small section that would have the satellite radio company paying royalties on recordings dating before 1972.

That's a whole lot of songs and a whole lot of money the company is hoping to skip out on paying, but not if stars like Paul McCartney, P!nk, Stevie Nicks, Sia, Carly Simon, Gloria Estefan, Mick Fleetwood, Don Henley, Max Martin, and Katy Perry can help it.

The letter read, in part:

I'm writing you with grave concern about SiriusXM's opposition to the Music Modernization Act (Classics Act included).

We are all aware of your company's objections and trepidation but let me say that this is an opportunity for SiriusXM to take a leadership position. As you are aware, 415 Representatives and 76 Senators have already cosponsored the MMA along with industry consensus. It's SiriusXM vs all of us. We can either fight to the bitter end or celebrate this victory together. Rather than watch bad press and ill will pile up against SiriusXM, why not come out supporting the most consequential music legislation in 109 years? We do not want to fight and boycott your company but we will as we have other opponents. Stand with us! Be brave and take credit for being the heroes who helped the MMA become historic law! Momentum is building against SiriusXM and you still have an opportunity to come out on the right side of history. We look forward to your endorsement but the fire is burning and only you can put this out.

SiriusXM resoponded with a letter of their own:

Over the past several weeks, we have been the subject of some stinging attacks from the music community and artists regarding our views on the Music Modernization Act. Contrary to new reports and letters, this is really not about a SiriusXM victory, but implementing some simple, reasonable and straightforward amendments to MMA. There is nothing in our "asks" that gut the MMA or kills the Act. So let's talk about the substance of the amendments we propose, because we truly do not understand the objections or why these concepts have incited such a holy war.ontrary to the accusations, SiriusXM has proposed three simple amendments to the MMA.

First, SiriusXM has asked that the CLASSICS Act recognize that it has already licensed all of the pre-1972 works it uses. This amendment would ensure that artists – the people who are supposed to be at the heart of the MMA – receive 50% of the monies under those existing licenses. Is that unfair? Just today, Neil Diamond wrote in the LA Times that: "I receive a small amount of songwriting royalties, but no royalties as the recording artist." How can that happen? To date, SiriusXM has paid nearly $250 million dollars in pre-'72 royalties to the record labels. We want to make sure that a fair share of the monies we have paid, and will pay, under these licenses gets to performers. Without this provision, artists may never see any of the money SiriusXM paid, and will pay, for the use of pre-1972 works. Artists not getting paid hurts our business!

Second, Sirius XM thinks that the fair standard to use in rate setting proceedings is the standard that Congress chose in 1995 and confirmed again in 1998 – which is called the 801(b) standard. However, we are willing to move the "willing buyer/willing seller" standard contained in the MMA. In exchange, we have asked for the same concession that the MMA grants to other digital music services, but we were left out of — simply that the rates that were set last year for five years now apply for ten years. We thought this was a fair compromise when we read the "new" MMA that was released this weekend by the Senate, and are willing to live by that compromise.

Third, SiriusXM is asking the simple question: "Why are we changing the rate court evidence standard for musical compositions in this legislation so that it gives another advantage to broadcasters over satellite radio and streaming services?" There is no policy rationale for this change to tilt the playing field further in their favor, and frankly no one has been able to explain it to us. It is only fair that we debate why the change to Section 114(i) is in the MMA.

Did you all catch that? It sounds like lawyer speak for "we don't really want to say where we stand."

media.giphy.com

It seems all the letters were for naught. The Music Modernization Act passed in the U.S. Senate.




It was time to celebrate and dance in the streets.









As the saying goes, honest pay for honest work.

media.giphy.com


H/T: Variety, Spin

Some Residents Of Uranus, Missouri Are Not Happy About The Name Of Their New Local Newspaper 😆
CBS Philly/YouTube, @ShirtlessKirk/Twitter

There's nothing like a good pun about human anatomy. Really gets the juices flowing!


Owners of the new Uranus Examiner must have been snickering as they announced the paper's name. Apparently, it's caused quite the controversy in the small town of Uranus, Missouri, over the last few days.

Residents are divided over whether the pun is an embarrassment or perfectly snarky:


Folks on the internet responded with maturity and composure after learning about the Uranus Examiner.

Oh, wait. No they didn't.





If you think about it... there might actually be a method to the madness here. The brand new paper's name has received widespread media coverage over this past week. Simply put... everyone's talking about Uranus.

In terms of publicizing their new venture, the owners of the Uranus Examiner have actually done a pretty sweet job!


In the video above, a woman suggests the paper should have been called "The Pulaski County Examiner."

If you ask me, that's TOTALLY BORING, and wouldn't have generated as much interest and publicity for the paper. So while the name might be cringeworthy to some, you can bet Uranus that it'll stick around. Who knows, Uranus might even grow as a result!

H/T: Indy100, The Kansas City Star