People Break Down The Most Unexplainable Thing That's Ever Happened To Them
Let's not underestimate how massive the world is. While most of the modern landscape can be mapped out on our phones, there's still dark corners hiding darker secrets undiscovered to most humans. It's when those secrets, those unexplained happenings, leak out of their corners that we get unimaginable things, much like the stories below.
Reddit user, u/HoneysuckleDame, wanted to hear about:
Who Was That?
I was driving at night after a football game as a high school student. My younger sister was in the passenger seat and my friend was in the middle back seat, leaning forward to chat with us easier. We were dropping my friend off before heading home, and driving down a pretty dark road to get there (we lived in a rural area, so no street lights).
Suddenly, my sister and friend both gasp and I step on the brakes, thinking they must have seen a deer or something. They're both in shock, asking me if I just saw "that old man who flashed up in the middle of the road and then disappeared." I hadn't seen anything but I was terrified. They were both so shocked and had the exact same reaction. My friend didn't even want to get out at his house once we got there he was so scared.
Don't Open Your Eyes
I was 20 staying with my husband's friends in West Palm Beach, FL. In the middle of the night, my husband screamed. I opened my eyes and there was a dark figure of a man standing at the foot of the bed. He stood at my husband's feet. I screamed and leapt out of the bed hitting the wall light switch. The figure was gone and our friends were banging on the door. It was very strange that we both saw the exact same thing.
Crossing The Road
I live in a beach town and one of my friends had just got back to her parents house for the summer, so I went over to hang out for a little while. Since it wasn't late when I went to go home I figured I'd take the long way home to drive along the bay for the view of the stars and the lights of the ships waiting to go up the river. When I got to the road that runs a long the bay, I realized I wasn't going to see anything because heavy fog had rolled in which is super common in the spring. This road is a 25mph road with the beach and trails over the dunes on the left, and houses on the right.
I was driving along the road with pretty bad visibility with how foggy and dark it was. All of a sudden from my left I see a figure coming up the dune and towards the road. I slammed on my brakes hard enough to skid a little because I thought it was someone coming off the beach to go to a house across the road. It had the shape of a woman in a long dress but I couldn't see any facial features. When it got to the middle of the road the figure it just floated up at an angle and disappeared.
There wasn't a beach access trail where I saw it and I can't figure and logical explanation for the way it hovered and took off. I was stopped and watched it until it disappeared trying to figure it out. It freaked me out pretty bad honestly, and even 5-6 years later I still can picture the way it moved like it was yesterday.
Meh, I Kind Of Figured It Was Haunted
Stayed over at a friends house. In the middle of the night I woke up to what sounded like someone walking in the attic above us. Thought nothing more of it and went back to sleep. Wake up and on his ceiling were footprints in a perfect circle around his lightbulb as if someone was walking upside down around the light.
Showed it to him and he just shrugged and said he thought his house was haunted, but it didn't bother him. That was 30 years ago and I still remember it like it was yesterday.
Let. Me. In.
1988, we were renting a refurbished house that was part log cabin from the 1700s. Was on the John in the bathroom when I heard 3 very loud knocks on the wall beneath the bathroom window. Looked out the window - nada. 30 seconds later it happened again, and again nothing outside. Later, wife and I decide to plant some stuff beneath the bathroom window outside, and 4 inches down we hit a concrete slab. Turns out the bathroom used to be entranceway to the log house. Spooky as hell.
Wait For It...
About 1973 -- I went to work. Got out of the car. Walked to the entrance and on the way saluted Warrant Officer Fardy because he was in uniform. He had always worn civilian clothes. He waved me on and said he'd be in in a minute.
I got to my office and expected to be the first one there because I always got there first as the lowest ranking guy in the office and had to make the coffee. I was surprised that the chief, a captain, and his senior sergeant were already in the office.
The captain asked me to sit down at my desk. I thought I was in trouble. He said he had some bad news. Warrant Officer Fardy was killed in a head-on collision at 3 am that morning. I protested that I had just seen him outside in the parking lot. The captain said he and the sergeant had identified the body just an hour earlier.
Something More Grounded In Reality
My family has tons of weird paranormal stuff but the one I actively think about had nothing to do with ghosts or anything. My best friend vanished in like 4th or 5th grade. Her whole family just up and left without warning. Got a phonecall from her months later saying she missed me and she was safe but wasn't allowed to give any details. Someone came in the room and she had to hang up. To this day I have no freaking clue what happened. Every now and then I try to find her on social media. No luck, yet.
Do you know what her parents did? Perhaps they were relocated into witness protection or if there was some kind of abuse perhaps she left with one parent and they had to stay in "hiding" from the other? The fact you cant find her on social media is odd as well.
As I was a little kid at the time I have no idea, but witness protection had crossed my mind. It might also be worth mentioning her family was from a non-English country overseas. It could just be that someone back home had an emergency and they had to go help take care or something. I like to think there's a harmless reason for it and I just can't find her because she's not on English socials. Maybe she transitioned and I'm looking for someone who doesn't exist as I knew her. I want them to be safe and happy, whatever the reason. Just wish I knew.
There Hasn't Been A Phone There For Years
Worked as a night auditor at an old hotel. It was around 2am and I get a phone call from the pool room, which is suppose to be closed. I pick up the phone and answer and all I hear is very heavy breathing. I hang up the phone and check the cameras and all the lights are on in the pool room. So I go down the hallway to kick whoever it is out. But as I get close to the glass door it is so cold I can see my breath, the door is completely fogged over and all the lights are out. I open the door and the light above me comes on because they are motion sensor lights. I am looking around but I don't see anything. Then the light comes on across the pool from me but nothing is there.
Then every light in a path begins to light up around one side of the pool as if something is walking towards me. I ran out of there so fast and locked myself in my managers office and stayed until sunrise. But the worse was yet to come. I had played it off in my head as bugs causing the motion sensor lights to go off. I was telling my manager about my experience so he would get a good laugh.
When I told him about the phone call from the pool he didn't laugh at all. He asked me if I was 100% positive the caller I'D said the pool room, and I said yeah. Then he told me there hasn't been a phone in the pool room for thirty years. I told him there was no way because that would be physically impossible. He told me to go look for myself. I looked and there was no phone. Complete and total mindf-ck because I didn't believe in the supernatural at all before that. But to this day no matter how many ways I try to rationalize it, I just can't. It is completely unexplainable.
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People Share The Best Historical Facts They Know About Their Family
"Reddit user ForthrightPedant asked: 'What is a historical fact about your family that you think is kinda neat?'"
Every family has its secrets.
It's up to every new generation to unearth it all.
Don't we all want to know if we're related to famous people?
Or what if we have a familial stake in lands and businesses?
Also, this is a good way to NOT end up dating blood relatives.
The more you know, the less awkward later.
As much as there is a lot of trauma there could be a lot of cool facts to to discuss at parties.
Redditor ForthrightPedant wanted to hear some interesting family histories, so they asked:
"What is a historical fact about your family that you think is kinda neat?"
I don't have any family history.
Of course I've done no investigating.
Maybe I do.
I should look!
Super Talent
Excited Happy Hour GIF by Boomerang Official Giphy"Great-grandpa created the Flintstones. Dan Gordon. Drew lots of Hannah-Barbara cartoons, and directed the first three animated Superman films at the beginning of WW2 as well as several seasons of Popeye, Scooby Doo, Smurfs, Yogi Bear, Huckleberry Hound."
downnoutsavant
Bad Voyage
"My grandfather disliked America and wanted to return to Ireland. He booked passage on the Titanic’s return voyage. If it wouldn’t have sunk, no of us would be here."
mrseddievedder
"My great-grandmother was a Titanic survivor. She was a steerage-class Lebanese immigrant in an arranged marriage. Her husband went down with the ship but she managed to make it to a lifeboat and made it to the Carpathia. Then she remarried in a Lebanese neighborhood in Virginia. Had it not been for the iceberg that struck and sank the Titanic My family lineage would be different and I wouldn't be here. My family's official toast is 'to the iceberg.'"
jaspersurfer
Forgotten
"My husband's grandfather was one of the 'forgotten soldiers' in Canada. He was a Canadian-born Chinese man who asked the Canadian government to fight for his right to vote and a passport. Even tho he was born in Canada in the 20’s since he was Chinese he was not considered Canadian."
H"e was dropped into the Burma jungle and was told he would likely never return. He was in the 10% that did return. He was given the right to vote, to a passport, and to University."
"His wife is still alive today and my son is named after him."
cowskeeper
Can you imagine?
"My great-grandmother had 13 kids, so she was pregnant for literally a decade. There’s two hundred of us now, all because of this one woman."
CoverlessSkink
"My great grandma had 14 kids. My grandma was the youngest. She died giving birth to my grandma. The oldest child who was like 22 years old raised my grandma. My great-grandfather remarried a woman who had 10 kids of her own. My grandma would tell me stories of them all living together. Can u imagine? 😦."
Content_Pool_1391
Long Ago
american wtf GIF by unimpressionism Giphy"The land my dad was raised on and my cousins still live on was deeded to the family by George Washington as compensation for service during the Revolution. There was a document with his signature on it at the courthouse until a fire destroyed the records a few decades ago."
mustbethedragon
So much land and fortune and HISTORY has been lost due to fire.
Thank God we keep more than paper records now.
Over the Moon
Michael Jackson Dancing GIF Giphy"My second cousin is David Scott who walked on the Moon and drove the moon buggy. My mom does. He was so busy during the time when I was young that he even said later in life that he wished she’d gotten to know more of his family."
Roadgoddess
The Union
"Great-great-great grandfather on my mom's side was working his field in the part of Virginia that split off and became a new state because they didn't want to secede from The Union. Union soldiers came along looking for conscripts and he was a young, able-bodied man so they told him to come with them. He informed them he was a Quaker and thus a pacifist. According to family lore, that discussion went on for a bit but he would not give in. So they shot him and left him there. Good thing he had a couple of kids well before that day."
SpottyNoonerism
Opportiunities
"My great-grandfather was offered a chance to invest in a new invention by a guy by the name of Alexander Graham Bell. He declined, saying at most there would be one telephone per town."
Carson4307
"That is apparently my family too."
"One uncle apparently built a version of a hot water heater and then sold the design to GE for a good sum back then."
"Another uncle was asked if he wanted to be in a photo during his military service. He said no so they raised the flag on Iwo Jima without him in it."
"No idea if any of these are true, at best they are enhanced truths, but for me, I really hope they are true."
Jormungand1342
Underground
"I have a relative who worked for the Underground Railroad and had a price on her head in the South."
dahlia6767
"My uncle was a carpenter. And was doing restoration work on old houses in Yellow Springs, Ohio. Many of those old, historical homes had underground railroad passageways and hidden walls. He got to see and restore many of them. He had photos of some of the work he was doing and I got to see those as a kid. Living in Southern Ohio, we have a lot of rich underground railroad history here."
AddictiveArtistry
Family Empire
blood discussion GIF Giphy"My great-grandfather was the town police chief in the 1920s. His brother was the Mayor. Their cousins ran the casino."
"My family was a smaller version of Boardwalk Empire."
nowhereman136
Wouldn't we all love a show based on our families?
Then that's even more neat family history.
People Who Know Someone Super Rich Explain What Makes Them Different
The super wealthy aren't like most people.
How can they be?
They live in a world of rarefied air most people will never even glimpse.
That privilege inevitably warps perspectives.
Reddit user sunnybestie asked:
"To people who have also worked with multimillionaires or billionaires, what is something different they do from ordinary people?"
To Drive...
"Years ago a friend of mine’s dad was trying to sell his start-up company and picked-up an investor at the airport."
"He was proud of his classic Rolls Royce and noticed the investor looking around, playing with the air vents."
"So he said 'Is this your first time in a Rolls Royce?'.”
"The guy said no, but it was his first time in the front seat."
~ LanceFree
...Or Not To Drive
"I used to do in person one on one market research interviews with luxury car owners and one thing that struck me after hundreds of interviews was that the only people who drove Rolls Royce's themselves were self made 'new money' wealthy people."
"The old money people all HAD Rolls Royce's but they were driven around in them because one of the reasons that you get a Rolls is the incredible back seat. If the old money were driving themselves, then they would have luxury cars but they very rarely drove Rolls."
"It may have been one of those social faux pax to wealthy old money to be in the same seat as their drivers or something like that but I never actually asked about it."
~ alwaysfailatlife
Sharing Is Caring
"Well the owner of my small company is incredibly wealthy but also rad as f*ck and he drives a literal tank on property all the time just for the fun of it."
"He also owns a very old, gorgeous estate from an extremely influential family (think Vanderbilts) and we throw parties there. But on top of it, he lets his employeees borrow it for events."
"So my husband and I are throwing an anniversary party (never had a reception) in 2024. We have the entire estate and all 10 bedrooms for a whole weekend and it isn’t costing us a single dime.
"If I didn’t work for the company, the cost of the venue would be upwards of $25k for the day."
"I never expected someone so incredibly wealthy to be so down to earth and generous. It’s exactly who I would strive to be at that level of wealth."
~ HistoricalHeart
"Hire a private chef for a casual Tuesday lunch with her girlfriends..."
"$2k, just like that."
~ Tall-Poem-6808
"About 25 years ago, a friend of my dad was turning 65 and treated 50 of his best friends to fly 1st class to London for 5 days, INCLUDING tickets to Phantom of the Opera for all."
"One of his products was just picked up by Walmart for exclusive sale, and he wanted to spend a small bit of his good fortune."
~ perfect_square
Time Is Money
"He managed time very differently than anyone I was used to. E.g., our meeting with him began precisely on schedule, lasted 30 minutes, and there was no chit chat."
"Before this meeting we had a pre-meeting with his admin to discuss expectations. The admin explained that we had to be on time, no introductions/titles just name, no small talk, no marketing, be prepared to answer technical and financial questions quickly and succintly."
"For this latter, if there were numbers we had to know precisely which page of the material had the information."
"When the meeting took place we were brought in exactly—to the second—at the start time. Sat down and within 30 seconds he was asking us all manner of questions."
"I had to field technical questions that appear to be asked not so much for whether my answer was right, but that I didn't hesitate. I also gained a healthy respect for my manager as he was SHARP and answered quickly and accurately."
~ frank-sarno
Simple And Not So Simple Pleasures
"When in elementary school my son's friend's dad was one of the 2 founders of Capital One."
"Mom had a secretary for play dates."
"Dad would fly to London to watch Tottenham football matches—had a permanent seat. Their London house was next to J.K. Rowling's."
"You couldn't tell by the way they dressed or their cars. But their vacations were the big difference."
"Their son loved a mango juice sold maybe 10-15min from their house. I always made sure we had some at mine."
"I send it to him via Amazon occasionally."
~ dcgradc
Higher Expectations
"One old money rich person treated me to a fancy meal and she was super polite and nice and tipped well, what struck me was the decisiveness and confidence that everyone there would cater to her, and they did. She wanted x dish that they didn't make that day and they made it.
"The one that sticks with me was at the end she said "I want a cappuccino with (something) I want them to put a design on it" like I've gotten cute cappuccinos in my life, it doesn't even cost extra."
"It never occurred to me to just ask for everything I want all the time."
"This was the same person that on a business trip hugged me after the flight 'I did it!' Me: 'Oh was this your first time in economy' and she goes 'No, flying commercial'."
~ woman_thorned
"The expectation that someone else will always cater to you is spot-on."
"I work at a really fancy hotel within walking distance of an ivy league university, and the super wealthy people just... expect certain things."
"Most people around them who aren't their friends or family are considered 'the help' (even if they don't say it out loud)."
"They also feel pretty entitled to things, like they will just walk up behind the bar and grab a bottle of wine that they want."
~ Dana_Scully_MD
Fines Are Payment To Do Whatever You Want
"In SoCal there's been a little problem with water so fines were instituted for overuse. $10k/month for really excessive use—water management thought this would really put a stop to wasting water!"
"Folks with enormous lawns at their 2nd or 3rd home in Palm Springs considered $120k/year a 'gardening expense' and continued on as before. It wasn't even a blip on their radar."
"Things did improve a bit when the whole situation was 'named & shamed' in the media... but I bet they're back to the lawns again by now."
~ qpgmr
"For a rich person, anything illegal that results in a fine can be ignored because they do it then just pay the fine."
"Lawyers and political donations are there for the rest."
~ bk2947
"Punishable with a fine' means 'legal for a price'."
~ fightingfish278
"Wealth allows people to express their pre-existing antisocial tendencies."
"Some of us go out of our way not to make life harder for others. Others just don’t give a damn."
"We let the wealthy ones get away with it because of their money."
~ iuseallthebandwidth
Delegate The Mundane
"That's the thing with the extremely wealthy, an overwhelming portion of the time and effort that ordinary people expend just maintaining their lives are taken care of by other people."
"It's very easy to find the time for social and leisure activity when someone else is taking care of all of the mundane sh*t for you."
~ tacknosaddle
"That's the real answer: they have people who handle things for them."
"I dated a gal whose family was 'well off'—dad had sold a company you've heard of for about $600,000,000."
"The whole family had a 'professional assistant', Janice. If someone needed something arranged, text Janice."
"Seven course catered dinner on Christmas Eve? Text Janice. Prep the semi-private jet for a flight cross-country? Janice will set it up."
"Need the oil changed in the Chrysler Town & Country minivan (seriously)? Janice will have it done. Need access to the family's private ranch outside of Aspen? You'll work with the caretaker, and Janice will coordinate."
"I got to spend some time with Janice and she was paid very fairly for her work."
~ persondude27
It's certainly an entirely different way of life. Wish we could text Janice for some things, though!
Do you have any stories to add? Let us know in the comments below.
People Reveal Their Picks For All-Time Worst Fast Food Restaurant
A lot of things have gone downhill since the pandemic, and it's made the whole process of bouncing back from those two to three years that much harder.
One thing we can all agree on is the quality of the food that we now find in restaurants, especially the fast-food joints we used to frequent and hit the drive-thru for on the drive home.
Curious what other people thought, Redditor Soy_tu_papi asked:
"What's the worst fast food restaurant?"
Eat... Expensive, Not Fresh
"Subway. The ingredients don't taste fresh. They don't give you enough meat or cheese. The bread tastes sweet. It's not even that cheap anymore."
- Brilliant-Mango-4
There for the Nostalgia
"Tim Hortons. We’re nostalgic for a time when they made fresh donuts and great soup and sandwiches. But that was more than 20 years ago and now everything is just heated from frozen garbage with garbage dish water coffee."
"The only reason they’re around is nostalgia and convenience. Americans for the most part didn’t fall for their crap when they expanded south because they didn’t have one on every corner, and they don’t have the nostalgia, and they already have a s**tty coffee and donut place called Dunkin."
- Strain128
Microwaved Soup
"Really, we all going to pretend like Panera is not fast food?"
- WelderNo6075
"It’s not fast. It's always a 20-minute wait."
- Greedy-Time-3637
"For microwaved soup."
- InsertBlueScreenHere
Hospital Food. Gourmet Prices
"Panera. For when you want hospital food, but you can’t afford the $127,209.00 hospital bill."
- BarnacleMcBarndoor
"Yeah, it’s only $126,208 for Panera."
- sherlock----75
"There is a similar yet worse than Panera hospital food restaurant called Atlanta Bread Company. How these two hell holes stay in business, I have no idea."
- GrandUnhappy9211
New Horizons
"I think KFC abandoned the American market and put all its resources into the Asian market, because omg KFC in Korea is something else. The chicken is breaded perfectly, with no mouth-destroying rock-hard breading and the ratio of breading to actual chicken meat is perfectly balanced."
"Also, the sauce selection; they have so many good sauces. The fries were great too."
- LolitasDaniel
RIP, Potato Wedges
"In my opinion, KFC. They got rid of their beloved potato wedges. The only thing I got there anymore was those and the mashed potatoes."
- dirtymoney
"Wendy’s breakfast potatoes almost fill that hole in my heart."
- Karsa69246
Those Darn Screens
"Any of them that have replaced their menu boards with TV screens that change every 15 seconds so I can't find the price of anything."
- xkulp8
"I hate the TVs. Maybe I'm just a bitter old guy, but they really don't seem to be an improvement. There's just too much going on, and it's too bright. Sure, it's probably more convenient for menu/price changes. But when you add in the cost and electronic waste, it doesn't feel like a net gain."
- BumpyMcBumps
No Longer Affordable
"McDonald’s. They’ve forgotten their role as the place I eat at because I’m broke, probably drunk, and want to fill up for a few bucks. Have you seen their prices lately!?"
- Jlace001
"A quarter pounder meal is over $10. $4 More bucks and you can get a chills old-timer and fries. And they always park you, so not very 'fast,' unless you are talking about the stomach cramps you get after."
- Eric12345678
Define 'Pizza'
"Little Caesars Hot-N-Ready is for when your manager promises you a pizza party when you exceed your sales goal and buys enough for one piece a person, but he's been talking up this party he's going to throw for you all week, so you come in on your day off and see two Hot-N-Ready boxes sitting there and some Dixie cups for water. Sometimes nothing is better, STEVE."
- cold08
"The secret technique for Lil Caesars is to give it another few minutes in the oven/under the broiler at home until it's to your liking."
- KaRabbit
The Great Pizza of the Past
"It hurts me to say this, but Pizza Hut."
"Back in the 80s and early 90s, Pizza Hut was amazing! It's somehow worse than Dominos now. It's a f**king travesty."
- Ocku2
"Their marinara sauce with breadsticks is watery now..."
"My friend and I used to ride our bikes there and play Pac-Man in eighth grade. Their breadsticks and sauce were amazing."
- KkdBaby
Small and Stale
"Whataburger is very hit or miss depending on the individual location. It was also better before it sold out and went national."
- HoovesCarveCrater
"It used to be so good, but it's so bad now. Earlier in the year, I went, and I got a stale bun with a tiny piece of meat they called a hamburger. Then I stupidly went again months later, and got the chicken sandwich. Both the bread and chicken were somehow stale. Never again, it's not worth it."
- user_base56
Belly Bombers, Indeed
"White Castle. I ate there once, and I now know what it feels like to reject an organ."
- flyzapper
"I have a stomach of steel when it comes to fast food. Not even Taco Bell gives me an above-average s**t. But when it comes to White Castle, some things just can't be saved."
- STILETTO_exists
A Rise in Poor Management
"Sonic used to be good."
"I feel for the two workers running the whole place. There used to be a lot of staff to handle the load."
"But now I feel bad going there simply because it's unfair to the workers. Which means corners get cut, things aren't clean, people aren't happy and workers end up catching the blame because there aren't enough of them."
"They really need to get it together. And treat their customers and employees right. It's going to kill their business."
- That_90s_Kid_
"The only Sonic near me stopped serving onion rings, which to me is their best side. And they take for-f**king-ever now to get you food, and half the time it's wrong or half-a**ed. I used to love Sonic, and I still want to and will go there, but every time it's a let-down in some form."
- SweetCosmicPope
"Sonic used to give their managers minority ownership as part of their compensation package. The result was highly motivated managers. Unfortunately, they had to work 80 to 90 hours a week. I thought about getting onboard with them but after using two weeks of vacation from my current job to work there, unpaid, I quickly decided smelling like French fries 24 hours a day, seven days a week was a very bad idea."
- the_beeve
A Series of Failures
"A bad KFC is tough to top, but there are still some amazing ones out there. The key is that it’s busy enough to have fresh chicken and a few employees that aren’t strung out. Not all. Just some."
"Burger King increasingly tastes like the burgers from my elementary school that sat in that weird burger water after being boiled in its own juices. I like their nuggets though."
"What even is Jack in the Box? It’s just some random assortment of food you take kids who can’t agree on what hot garbage they want to eat so you go here and make everyone unhappy."
"I’ve been to Whataburger once and it was bad, but since it’s crazy popular, I assume maybe it was just a bad experience and it was in AZ vs TX."
"I feel like I’m left with Little Caesars at this point, as the person buying those godawful hot and ready things is the epitome of a desperate person just trying to fill their children’s with ‘pizza’, thus the reason why there are any in existence."
- bowindine
So Real for This Answer
"Basically, every single one since the pandemic."
- MythicalMango123
"Dine-in prices for dollar store flavors."
- WannaBeTraveler87
"This is the answer. They are all awful now."
- chris1out
Especially for those of us who had the pleasure of experiencing these food places in the 80s, 90s, and maybe the very earls 2000s, it's terrible to think of how much these places have declined now.
As some Redditors have said, it's almost not worth going to these places anymore. We'd rather preserve the happy memories of going there with our families and friends rather than go for an unhappy meal now.
If it wasn't for our inner voices warning us about various life predicaments, who knows where we'd end up?
When a salesperson for a product works their charm to persuade us, our instincts may tell us not to rush into purchasing due to the suspicious quality of the product.
When a prospective date shows up in person and they just don't match the impression you got during the online interaction, your gut is telling you to back away.
But sometimes, the warning signs don't come from you.
Strangers online weighed in with their experiences about being tipped off when Redditor asked:
"What is the biggest red flag you have come across?"
These Redditors discuss polyamory and how it may or may not apply to them.
About Unfaithfulness
"Used polyamory as a scape goat for cheating."
– Helix_On_The_Hill
"I have a friend who claims to be poly. Then she confessed to me that she and her partner hadn't had sex in over a year, supposedly because her prescription meds lowered her libido - so she declared to him she was asexual. Partner just apparently went with it. Last year we went on a group trip overseas, and she immediately f'ked a stranger she met. She told her partner, which made him pretty upset (and he didn't do anything about it other than bottle it up), and that caused some tension during the trip."
"She then explained to me that it's okay to be poly and at the same time refuse to have sex with your primary partner. She offered a compromise to her partner that she would see a sex therapist."
"I ended up biting my tongue (this person reacts badly to getting feedback) and lost a lot of respect for them as a friend, because of the way she treated her partner when it came to sex."
– monkeychasedweasel
Common Strategy
"My Ex used the 'poly so I can cheat' strategy twice because she was disinterested in me. I would go into more detail but I’ve mostly chalked it up to a learning experience, moved on and mostly forgot about it."
"The other thing is that I can be a very clingy person and that’s why the strategy was so effective."
– Helix_On_The_Hill
Updating Your Significant Other
"I decided I'm poly and we're in an open relationship, sorry I didn't tell you until after I cheated".
– anon
"I'm poly. Every once and a while (really only ever seen it online), I'll hear about someone 'coming out' to their partner as poly. Grosses me the hell out."
– petrasdc
Full Transparency
"I would figure that's something you'd mention pretty early on to a potential new partner. Not go 'This isn't what it looks like!' In the middle of things."
– Mike7676
Anger issue is all the rage.
Tipping Point
"I've said it here before on my old account, the biggest red flag is quick to anger. If their default emotion is anger, that's unhealthy. I'm talking about snapping over the smallest mistakes/things. Over the top anger reactions. Any volatile reactions that do not match the situation are huge red flags."
– Practical_Reindeer23
Relationship On The Rocks
"My partner got angry with me while I was having a moment of big overstimulation when we were at a concert, because I physically could not communicate (sometimes that freeze mode really takes hold) and he was trying to get me to leave, as his way of 'fixing' the situation. I at least shook my head no, because I was waiting on the band I wanted to see play, I just couldn’t physically vocalize. I was definitely very tense and was dealing with a lot of ticks, which isn’t normally how I get, but I was trying to handle it on my own, using tapping techniques and things. He got angry that I didn’t do as he wanted and that I didn’t vocalize a response, 'it’s not that hard when someone asks a question for you to answer.'"
"We’ve been together for 7 years and have gone through a roller coaster of changes/self development. But I exploded once I ended up giving in to his wants and leaving the venue."
"I don’t feel supported or listened to or validated, ever. Everything outside of his mindset doesn’t matter to him so why bother discussing anything."
"I hate it here."
– Virtual-Moment-9132
As if first dates weren't already nerve-wracking.
Dating Nature Boy
"The guy would ONLY go on dates in the woods at night. I’m not even kidding. I’d suggest a movie night or a restaurant I wanted to try but it was shut down immediately because he only did dates in the woods. Worst part is I went on 3 of them before I cut him off."
– PixelatedBats
Flashing Warning Sign
"I made out with a guy on a party. He told me 'I have to warn you: I'm really an a**hole.' I was pretty taken aback, then thanked him for the warning and avoided him for the rest of the night."
– skanus_cepelinai
Having Strict Parents
"She asked her mother for permission to eat meat. A 30 year old with a full time job."
– yumsilly
"I had a coworker who had a family tracking app on her phone, but it was her parents tracking her. She was 25."
"She thought it was normal or not a big deal. Her mom would flip out if she did something like go shopping at lunch or spend too much time at the gym."
"Apparently, her mom was super paranoid she was secretly dating 'inferior' men and not the ones she was trying to set up for her daughter."
– ohlookahipster
Year ago I met a guy who was super sweet at work, and there seemed to be a mutual attraction.
However, I didn't jump to pursue anything with him, especially after I found out through a mutual friend that we had conflicting interests.
He was into Nazi uniforms and paraphernalia.
I gradually started disassociating with him because I didn't need that in my life.
It just goes to show, you never really know about a person, even if everything else seems perfect about him.