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Penny Pinchers Reveal The Fine Line Between Frugal And Cheapskate

Penny Pinchers Reveal The Fine Line Between Frugal And Cheapskate

When Saving Is Hurting

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There's nothing wrong with wanting to save a little money. Why buy the name-brand aspirin when the store-brand, generic kind has the same ingredients and costs a few bucks less? That's totally acceptable and should be encouraged more. What's not fine is when your penny pinching crosses into overly absurd territory. Reddit user, u/WannaWaffle, wanted to know about those times when they asked: When does "frugal" cross the line to "cheapskate"?

Way To Contribute, Bro

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So you know how when you have a get-together where people will be drinking, most people bring a few drinks to share, right? Or contribute in one way or another? Bring some beers, or a bottle of booze, or mixers, whatever?

I buy a huge bottle of vodka, my friend brings ice, and we ask our notoriously cheap friend to bring some orange juice so we can all enjoy some screwdrivers.

Upon arrival this dude pulls out an 8 oz recycled Poland Spring plastic bottle that he filled like halfway with some orange juice.

And it should be noted that this friend of ours is by FAR the most wealthy of ALL of us.

Yeah, cheapskate.

SkinnyTestaverde

Just Get The Membership, Karen!

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My wife refused for years to buy a Costco membership, while simultaneously forbidding me from buying things like bread and milk from anywhere but Costco.

She'd insist that I ask a friend with a membership every time we needed the smallest things. Her mom started gifting her a membership every year for Christmas so she'd stop demanding her to take her to Costco twice a week.

righthanddan

Seriously, Just Get Your Own, Shannon!

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My mother in law won't shop at Costco (or any other membership club) bc she thinks it's outrageous that they charge a fee. Ok, fine, fair enough. But if they have something on sale that she wants, she will stand outside of Costco asking people if she can go in with them and give them cash so they can check out with it. She has done this a handful of times, and thinks she's so d-mn clever and smart.

She is an inoffensive 60's middle-upper middle class white woman, so I guess she just finds people who probably take pity on her or something. She has no effing dignity about stuff like that (there are other hideous examples), and what disgusts me the most is how she brags about it. Like she's smarter and better than all the 'fools' who pay for membership. God I can't stand that woman.

Topbananapants

To Truly Know The Difference

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When you avoid your share of the Bill. When you inconvenience others to save money. When you go to even moderate lengths to justify either one of these behaviors.

Frugal folks make PERSONAL consumer decisions that have Long term money saving benefits. Cheapskates pass their bill on to others.

I_a--ed_you_a_Q

When You Don't Burden Your Friends

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I have many friends who are frugal, but one friend in particular who I see as cheap.

Here's the difference: if I suggest to one of my frugal friends that we go to a bar and they don't feel like spending money, they'll suggest another activity instead. "Why don't we drink at my house/hang out and watch a movie/go for a walk?" If I suggested the same thing to my cheap friend, his response would always be "I'll go if you buy my drinks."

Frugal people don't save money by burdening the people around them with their expenses. Cheap people have no problem doing that.

thurn_und_taxis

Wow, When It's All The Problems

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My step-dad is the biggest, most embarrassing cheapskate I know so here are a couple examples of the most extreme things he does:

-reuses paper towels by hanging them out to dry in my mom's front yard

-uses free tires off of totaled cars whenever one of ours needs replacing (which, if you think this is a good idea, I've had two near death experiences to prove otherwise)

-rewashes my siblings disposable swim diapers, again hanging them out to dry in the front yard

-uses wash clothes as toilet paper and only flushes for #2

-puts bricks in the toilet tank so it uses less water, leaving the toilet constantly smelling like piss

-refuses to use A.C. at anytime while living in South Florida and counts down from 3 when anyone opens the fridge

-refuses to purchase gifts for anyone unless they were procured at a garage sale (meaning he often leaves my mom and his kids high and dry for birthdays/holidays/anniversaries)

-constantly pulls over on the side of the road to dumpster dive: his favorite finds are a pair of temperpedic slippers (ew!) and a wooden futon which I'm afraid to be in the same room with

-when a door hinge broke in one of my siblings rooms 5 years ago, he refused to pay for a replacement and instead hung up a shower curtain (still there to this day)

-tries to sneak home food from buffets, after paying for his meal with a coupon

And my personal favorite...

-asking patrons at a restaurant if they're finished with their food mid-meal so he can take home the leftovers

Basically, if your frugal actions are making the people in your life embarrassed or uncomfortable, you've gone too far.

modestlymousie

Isn't That Stealing?

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I knew a guy once who'd buy a package of lightbulbs or batteries, take the fresh ones out, replace them with the dead ones then return them to the store claiming they didn't work and get his money back.

That guy hadn't legitimately bought lightbulbs or batteries in years.

llcucf80

Our Apartment Is Not A Hostel

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I had a roommate who was very practical. She picked up any change she found, even just pennies. She opted for cheaper options on anything where it didn't significantly diminish the quality. She even built a tiny house because she didn't believe that she really needed to spend much on a place to live. It worked well for her.

Then, there was my other roommate- conveniently, at the same time, all three of us were living together. Aside from thieving, getting actual furniture from the literal dumpster, and a whole bunch of other goodies, the story of how I came to live with him is probably the best story to showcase his nature.

There was him and two other guys living in the apartment before I moved in. There was another friend of theirs staying on the couch while he was looking for a job and a place to live. He was staying there for free, no biggie.

I was homeless at this point and had been sleeping in my car in the middle of winter (below freezing at night), so I jumped at the opportunity to sleep indoors, even if it meant having to sleep in an uninsulated garage. I could just toss on a few extra blankets.

My future roommate comes up to me after a week and he proceeds to tell me I owe him $200 for rent to stay in the garage. I ask him why I'm paying more than he does (per week) to sleep in a room without heating/air, a bathroom, and filled with cigarette smoke fairly often. He says that he and the other roommates talked about it and they decided I couldn't freeload, and I needed to get that money to him ASAP.

Now, he wasn't the one who paid the bills. I asked the 'head roommate' about it later that day, and he told me there was no discussion about 'freeloading' involving me and that I could basically pay him $50 for the month if I felt like it. I did pay him gladly, and that was that.

Empty_Insight

You Have Your Own House, Sharon!

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I have a relative who is too cheap to pay for trash service or to buy a dryer so she takes all of her trash and wet clothes over to her father's house. This is a woman with a family and a house, not a starving student or something.

So yeah, that.

Peaches_for_Me

Do People Actually Do This?

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Frugal is compromising and cutting out extra things in your life. Cheapskate is squeezing pennies on things you actually need.

For example washing all of your clothes at once, maybe once or twice a week and using a dollar store detergent is frugal. Wearing your clothes into the shower to wash them and you at the same time is cheapskate.

lemonylol

We Can See, Friend. We Can See.

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My grandpa will buy a roll of paper towels (like the cheapest single roll you can get) and then have my grandma rip off each sheet and cut that into fourths for "napkins"

Napkins that are already napkins cost like.... 5 cents more than the roll of paper towels.

It takes her like 2 hours because she's becoming arthritic.

Nobody else sees why this is stupid.

mini6ulrich66

Be Specific

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I knew a guy that, while ordering in line at Chipotle, would ask for "extra chicken but just enough where it's not considered a serving of double chicken".

Come on, man.

Texas_Tucker

Just A Few Degrees. Please?

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"I know it's 90 F outside, but the air conditioner cost money to run" says my roommate/landlord who makes six figures living in a ranch house

Edit: we have A/C in the house but he has the thermostat locked up and the only key and added some clarification

overcookedpopsicle

...This One's Actually Really Ingenious

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When a customer orders a single espresso in a large cup & then uses an entire carafe of milk at the condiment bar.

Bonus points if they bring that beverage back to the register & want it 'microwaved'.

monkeyeighty8

Flush

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When health or sanitation is risked.

AJEstes

if it's yellow let it mellow, qualify?

Juan911411

This site estimates a years worth of toilet flushing to cost $10.95

Really not worth the saving there. Not when you consider you're probably going to have to clean the toilet more often when you leave p-ss sitting in there. Time is money.

Bangersss

Again, Pretty Sure This Is Stealing

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I had a babysitter who I think crossed the line from frugal, to cheapskate.

She would only shop at Goodwill, and if her daughter wanted some shoes, she'd have her put the old shoes on the rack, put on the new shoes, and walk out the door.

Also, most of her daughters coloring books were picked up while dumpster diving. Like, half the pages were already colored, but we still used them.

michonne_impossible

....There's Nothing To Say.

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My grandma once bought me and my sister USED UNDERWEAR from a garage sale for Christmas. The worst part? She has a LOT of money. My dad was pissed.

mo799

At Least The Service Was Good?

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Frugal: not eating out at a restaurant

Cheapskate: eating out at a restaurant, but leaving $0 tip because "sorry I can't afford to tip"

chriberg

A Not-So-Giving Grandfather

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My grandpa after he served up ice cream he bought, would smooth it out the best he could and care his initials into the top of it to make sure none of his kids took more than he thought necessary. He also would fill almost empty jam jars with water shake it up and drink the mixture just so he wasn't throwing away any food.

He did a lot of stingy stuff, but these two stories stand out the most to me.

Edit: I forgot another good one, my mom as a kid got a nasty gash on her knee and my grandpa after examining it determined it needed stitches. Instead of doing what a normal person would do and take her to the hospital, he turned on the stove and heated up a sewing needle, and was going to stitch my moms knee back together with sewing equipment before his wife intervened and made him take my mom to the hospital. This I don't think was because he was cheap (which he definitely was), but he also has this attitude that if you can do probably do something yourself there is no reason to pay for someone else to do it.

RIPGeorgeHarrison

Write This Down And Don't Forget

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When the time you waste or the quality of life you lose are worth more than you save in money.

MarsNirgal

Sometimes, It's Okay To Shut It Down

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There was this cheap d***head at work I didn't like one bit. You know the type, one of those a--holes who does the big innocent eyes every time he gets called out. "Whoa, I didn't mean it like that!" or whatever.

I had invited a few work friends to come by and have some drinks and appetizers on me when I bought a new house. They had been listening to me talk about it for months, it was the least I could do.

So about ten minutes in, cheapo shows up, plops down at the far end of the table and starts ordering everything. Top shelf drinks, about 4 appetizers (which he didn't eat, they were left on the table) you know, just living it up.

I'm watching out of the corner of my eye, my plan was fully formed.

I see him gathering up his stuff to slip away, so I call the waitress over. "Everything is on me, except that guy. He's not my guest, I didn't invite him."

Everything just stops. He's looking at me (mouth open) and everybody is looking at him.

Waitress brings the check, I pay and tip generously. D-ckhead is trying to get someone to help him pay for his $60 worth of sh-t because he didn't have any money. No one liked him, so the response was a bunch of "Are you kidding me?" looks. When I left, he was calling people to try to get them to come up and pay for him. (Note that he had a brand new Charger in the parking lot.)

That guy hated me so much after that. He didn't have the stones to say anything to me though. And the story became office lore.

WitnessMeIRL

H/T: Reddit

People Who Hooked Up With A Coworker Break Down The Aftermath

Reddit user Nuff-Do asked: "People that had sex with coworkers - how did that turn out ?'

We've all heard that love and work do not mix, and we've definitely heard that we shouldn't take relationships or friendships with coworkers to the next level.

Between having our work, our jobs, our income, and maybe even our reputations on the line, there's simply too much at risk.

But maybe sometimes, the affair won't turn out quite the way we expected.

Redditor Nuff-Do asked:

"People who had sex with coworkers, how did that turn out?"

Rewarded with a Trip to Italy

"I was a young Airman at my first base in California and I worked with a girl (let's call her Sarah) who was way more attractive than anyone my small-town Missouri a** had ever hooked up with before."

"For some reason, she was into me. She was into a few other dudes too, but at the time it didn't matter because I was 19 and stupid and she was a few years older and far more sexually experienced than I was. We had sex a few times and sort of 'dated,' but it didn't really go anywhere and I was heartbroken but cool with it."

"This was right after 9/11, so U.S. military operations were starting to ramp up and Sarah got deployment orders. They didn't tell her where she was going, but she was on the hook."

"Her reaction to the news was to tell our Chief that she was pregnant with my kid so she didn't have to go. I knew she wasn't pregnant and just using it as an excuse not to deploy."

"The Chief came to me and asked if I'd go in her place. As I said, I was 19 and even though I was a little scared, I signed the dotted line and told him of course I'd take the deployment."

"It turns out, the 'deployment' was to a NATO base in Naples Italy where I'd be paid about 80 dollars per day per diem on top of my normal paycheck."

"As soon as Sarah found out where I was headed, she called the Chief and told him she wasn't pregnant anymore and would like to take the deployment."

"The Chief denied her request and I spent an amazing eight months in Italy, being paid more money than I knew how to spend and having the time of my life."

- NewPac

Watching Them Move On

"We met thru work and dated for one and a half years. She cheated with another coworker who is married. We broke up. She started to date a different coworker. Not the married one. She paraded that relationship in my face."

"Everything was great until it wasn't. It really f**ked over my self-esteem and self-worth for years. It sucked that I had front row seat to her moving on."

- bluevacuum

"I feel that last part. When my ex moved out, she did it slowly over the course of like a month. She came over every day and packed up slowly until she finally got everything."

"The worst day was when she finally came and took her cat. I still remember sitting in front of the door and crying for hours after she left that day."

"There's a band called Pedro the Lion that has this lyric, 'My old man always swore that hell would have no flame. Just a front-row seat to watch your true love pack her things and drive away.'"

- FTG_Vader

"When I kicked my ex out this summer for having cheated on me, I gave her an arguably unfair timeline to leave before all of her possessions just went outside, and packed and moved everything for her to the garage overnight, since I couldn't sleep anyways."

"This is why. I simply couldn't handle those constant reminders and wanted it done and gone as fast as possible."

- DeceiverX

A Messy Breakup

"I had resigned and was leaving the company anyway but it was one of those classic hookups at a company party. We had fun for a while but then she decided to stop seeing me."

"I'm glad I had left the company by then; otherwise, things would have been messy."

- love_boobs_in_dm

A Huge Theft Ring

"I got fired and she got fired and all 20 guys she f**ked while we were dating were fired."

"I got fired under false allegations because she was my girlfriend and she was stealing from the store."

"She got fired for stealing from the store."

"The other 20 were fired because it was brought up that she was stealing and sleeping with managers and other coworkers while in a relationship with me. They thought that me and her were the center of a theft ring."

"Like, no... I don't steal so."

- butahoomach

A Promotion for Everyone

"So my wife of over 10 years, who had cheated in the past and I forgave her, got a huge promotion at work which caused us to relocate."

"I guess she got tired of me because she kicked me out and we were getting a divorce."

"Four months later, I found out that a co-worker had a thing for me, so I took my shot. The sex was amazing. It could be that it’s been a long time for me since sex with the wife was basically non-existent for the last few years of marriage."

"Me and the co-worker have now been dating for over a year and I haven’t been happier. So for me, it worked out for the best. And the sex is still great!"

- Unrealevil360

Too Many Options

"I worked at a casino as the only male cocktail waiter/bartender (roughly eight cocktail waitresses and four female bartenders). The floor was mostly women between the bar, servers, restaurant, and dealers."

"I slept with one of the cocktail waitresses for a couple of months even though I knew I had a bigger crush on her than she did on me. I also knew I didn't really want a relationship with her for a couple of reasons."

"Evidently, she told some people and gave me good reviews. After she quit and moved away, I had more interest than I really knew what to do with and kinda just went for it with anyone who showed interest that I was attracted to as I knew I had no more than a year left there no matter what happened. I ended up with four more of them over the course of a couple of months."

"One time on a shift, I looked around and all four were on the floor somewhere. All knew each other but I'm not sure any knew about the whole situation, and none were any false impressions of a relationship as far as I know so nothing bad came of it."

- CallMeLargeFather

A Family Man

"Not me, but she was working in payroll and he was a security guard. One day, a coworker saw the security guard walking her to her car. Immediately, she was transferred to another branch. However, they continued to see each other."

"Soon after, they got married after finding out she got pregnant. In the next five years, they had three daughters, with me being the youngest. My dad ended up passing away from brain cancer when I was just a toddler."

- Swimming-Site-7682

The Downfall of a Friendship

"I had one good experience one bad. The first one we ended up dating for a year and a half. We had a ton of fun sneaking around at work, and even though in the end he totally broke my heart, it wasn't a bad experience."

"The second one was very bad. Do not recommend."

"I thought he would be safer because we were friends, so I figured communication and rules would be no problem. Instead, we didn't communicate at all because we were both so worried about hurting each other's feelings."

"It ended badly with major assumptions on both ends and now it's very awkward and uncomfortable."

"It makes me sad because honestly, I just miss my friend. While the experience can be fun, I don't recommend it."

- laylalove89

A Suspicious Relocation

"Pretty fine. We worked at different locations in the company the first time we slept together, but we knew each other as she had trained at my location."

"One night we ran into each other at the bar and one thing led to another. A couple of months later, I ended up getting transferred to the location she was at and we just acted like it never happened."

"After a month or two of working together, we ran into each other again at the same bar, and history repeated itself."

"There was a slightly awkward moment a couple of days later when I had to find a way to give her back the necklace she'd left at my place without anybody noticing, but other than that, our working relationship didn't change at all."

- Nervous_Chipmunk7002

Messy Feelings Everywhere

"First time: super fun but I got more attached than she did."

"Second time: kinda fun but she got more attached than I did."

"Moral of the story: don’t f**k coworkers unless you’re SUPER SURE."

- Arch021

A Heartbreaker

"We dated for over a year and then one day she randomly decided to break my heart. Thankfully, we had stopped working together by that point. It still makes me tear up thinking about her, though."

- Electronic-Mud1634

Best Decision Ever

"We had an instant connection the moment she joined the foundation I had been working at for a year. We worked at the front desk together and we got to know each other very quickly."

"Neither of us enjoyed small talk and we would get angry emails from our unbelievably incompetent manager about the amount of laughter coming from the front desk. We got all of our work done, and then some, our manager just felt like she was getting left out. Which our manager was, but it was because she sucked."

"I worked from home four days a week before my new coworker started and a few weeks later she asked me why I was coming in every day. I told her something about training her how to answer the phones, which she instantly knew was bullsh*t (we got four calls a day, max)."

"The first time we hung out outside of work we told each other it would be a terrible idea to date. That lasted for about 10 days. The next time we hung out we slept together."

"That was a year and a half ago."

"We left the foundation after she told our manager that her 'management style' was untenable in an email. The two of us then called a meeting with her and we laid out a very well-planned strategy for departmental growth and change."

"Our manager nodded her head the whole meeting and told us how proud of us she was for taking ownership of our careers and how excited she was to implement our new plan."

"Three weeks later, they fired my coworker. They pushed me out, telling me that they no longer had a place for me (at my review the previous year, the CEO told me herself that she believed I had CEO potential)."

"We both have new jobs, she is a high school English teacher at one of the best high schools in the country and I became a private investigator."

"Her dad and I go to college football games together and our moms get lunch and do spa dates."

"We have been showing each other how to heal and grow as individuals and as partners."

"Right now, she's sleeping in my bedroom while I type this in the living room. I don't know what the future holds for us but I do know that she's the love of my life."

"Sleeping with my coworker is the best thing I've ever done."

- frankenfine305

"Marry this girl already."

- Long-Regular-1023

Redefining the Coworker

"Pretty good. We have a kid together. Granted we'd been married for seven years before we became coworkers."

"She always wanted to teach at the same school as me. The school grew enough that it needed a dedicated English teacher. She has a master's in it so it worked out."

- i_have_seen_ur_death

A Slow Transition

"We worked together for a couple of years and became close friends before we crossed the romance line one night after a lot of drinks. Honestly, it was and still is amazing. Happily married now over 15 years with two kids."

- theshannons

A Bartender's Love Story

"She's sleeping next to me, cuddling our cat."

"Turns out our chemistry working behind the bar together was also amazing outside of work."

- Eb_Ab_Db_Gb_Bb_Eb

We've all heard that love and work don't mix, and that we absolutely shouldn't get close to our coworkers, but from these Redditors, it seems that while things could get messy, sometimes it's worth the risk.

adding machine with printed receipt tape
Towfiqu barbhuiya/Unsplash

When we're young and naive, we tend to be optimistic as we have our whole lives ahead of us and we have to time to figure out who we are and who we want to be.

But when we're all grown up and out in the big world on our own, nothing can prepare us for the harsh realities of adulting until we experience them.

And unfortunately, life isn't always sunshine and roses the way we imagined it to be when we were much more innocent.

Curious to hear about life's many wake up calls Redditor Just_Surround_2108 asked:

"What is the adult version of finding out that Santa Claus doesn't exist?"

Life's deceptions begin slowly revealing themselves.

Caveat Emptor

"When you buy an 8-piece tupperware set, 4 of the pieces are lids."

– throwmeawaypoopy

"Same with pots and pans. What a rip off!"

– MrsMalvora

"And when you put them in the cabinet, suddenly SIX of the pieces are lids 😂"

– opheliainwaders

Value Of Friendships

"That some friends were never really your friend."

– Kangaroowrangler_02

"Also that friendships can end just like any relationship."

– ScienceUnicorn

"The best friend I'll ever have said some nasty things to me and blocked me recently. Never going to get much closure on that front."

"Not having closure is, with both friends and lovers, worse than the loss itself. I want to grow. Tell me what I need to become so this doesn't happen to me again!"

– VoxClarus

"On a related note: your co-workers are not your friends."

– tomdelfino

"I think most people seem to treat this as the default stance, but I’ve learnt you can actually make deep connections amongst coworkers, the same way you do in other stages of your life."

– immorjoe

The role of parent and child unexpectedly switches. So now what?

Who's Parenting Who

"That time period when your relationship switches and your parent looks to you for answers and advice, instead them being the one with all the answers."

– Smile_Terrible

"Not sure about that one. Dad simultaneously says I’m the smartest person he knows and I don’t know how to do anything lol."

– Puzzleheaded-Job6147

About Grieving

"When both your parents die. I am in my mid 50’s and had my mom pass on Mother’s Day ‘22. My Dad then was living with us from then, and eventually reached in-home hospice status with a sudden stage IV cancer diagnosis. He died in January of this year, and then I got laid off from my tech job and was unemployed for 10 months. Nothing takes the wonderment and positive outlook from the world than having to empty out your childhood home solo and throw everything you grew up with into a big dumpster and are left to wonder what our lives really mean."

– i_spock

Leaving Behind The House You Grew Up In

"I’m in the process of dismantling my childhood home right now. I’ve compared it to dismembering the dead body of a loved one. It’s really rough."

– HaloTightens

"my mum sold my childhood home a decade ago. i won't have to go through that."

– deathschemist

We all want to grow up when we're young. But as soon as reach reach 30, we want to slam on the breaks.

Aimlessness

"I thought I'd grow up, move out, find my footing in the grown up world and basically switch into cruise mode. Now I'm in my 40s and sh*t is confusing as f'k."

– Borsti17

"As adults, nobody knows what they're doing, we're just pretending we do."

– BeautifulMidnight-

Misconception Behind Work Integrity

"Being a hard worker and good at your job doesn't necessarily mean that you'll be rewarded for it."

– DorianOrosco

And the laziest person at work is allowed to be lazy, but the hardest worker isn’t allowed a break."

– Puzzleheaded-Job6147

We Are Our Parents

"Finding out that your parents are people, too, with weaknesses or flaws that you were blind to when you were young."

– tamammothchuk

"And the day you suddenly notice how old they are. When their mortality finally hits you."

– daggerxdarling

Living On Borrowed Time

"Yep had that day earlier this month. Was visiting for dad's 75th birthday."

"As I was leaving, out in the sunshine and fixing to get in the truck, I suddenly saw how small and frail-looking they are now. Mom hit me the hardest. She's started to shrink. They are both healthy, but Dad's just . . . worn."

"Been also doing the math lately. The math where you count up how many times you see them a year and then multiply that by how many years they have left according to the average."

"I've had enough crap and surprise losses in my life that I've long since started parting with family and friends like it might be the last time I get to see them. But that times left to see them calculation really clobbers me with my folks, and it's not even that bad yet for me. Given the ages of my grandparents when they passed I've probably still got somewhere between 150-200 visits."

"But the meter is running."

– Boudyro

I'm at the point where I'm realizing there are no handbooks on life and taking care of our parents.

When you're so used to having them there and taking care of you your whole life, nothing can prepare you for the time when that role reversal happens.

As tough as that may be, however, there's nothing more beautiful in life than returning the favor for the people who loved you unconditionally and raised you.

It's not attractive to gloat.

And there is little more obnoxious than flaunting how wealthy you are.

Particularly if you aren't even that wealthy to begin with.

Indeed, perhaps to make themselves feel more powerful and important than they actually are, many people will try and show off how much money they have in what they wear, eat, live in, and drive.

However, not everyone is so easily fooled, as those in the know can detect a charlatan when they see one.

Redditor aloe_veracity16 was eager to hear the dead giveaways that someone might not be as wealthy as they appear, leading them to ask:

"What’s a dead giveaway that someone is not actually as wealthy as they claim?"

Stating The Obvious...

"When they constantly talk about how wealthy they are."

"A genius doesn't need to tell you they are smart."

"An athlete doesn't need to tell you they are fit."

"And a rich person shouldn't need to tell you they are wealthy."- TigLyon

Attracting Unwanted Attention...

"90% of the wealthy shut the f**k about it, because they learn once they start making good money everyone wants a piece."

"Talking about it constantly = broke AF."- Vladtehwood

Simply By Doing It...

"Making the claim at all is a dead giveaway."- Starfox41

In Plain Sight...

"People who actually ARE wealthy mostly try to hide it."- Matt7738

"Living In A Material World..."

"I'm not well-versed in judging someone's wealth, but I do notice that the fake rich only look rich on social media and try their hardest to go to popular locations celebrities post."

"I know a couple of friends of friends who took out a loan just to keep up the facade that they're all in on the latest iPhones and wearables."

"They built a persona of being a rich kid, so now they have to stay the course."- anima99

Flaunt Modesty, Not Wealth...

"As a person which knows many very rich people."

"I can guarantee that not a single one of them wants to be known as rich."- CompetitivePause9033

Schitts Creek Flirt GIF by CBCGiphy

We Heard You The First Time!!!

"When they repeatedly and adamantly tell you how wealthy they are."- Famous_Bit_5119·

Experiences Over Stuff!

"I feel like actual rich people prioritize vacations/travel, buying their kids cars, paying for their kids/grandkids tuition."

"They don’t spend money on flashy or luxury stuff as much."- Klesea

Summer Time GIF by Merge MansionGiphy

All In The Editing...

"Ever notice how those jet setting influencers that post their pictures out of the airplane window are behind the wing?"

"They're in coach."

"The picture in business is where they stopped to pose on the way through."- Turbulent-Ask-2633

Pack Light...

"Private Jet pilot friend of mine said for the slightly wealthy they bring loads of luggage."

"The ultra rich bring a day bag they have enough money to buy clothes when they get there or already have clothes waiting on them."- hadmeatgotmilk

The Less Said...

"I never met a wealthy person that talks about it."

"They don't need to."- 181Eclipse·

Christina Moses Secrets GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy

"See The Pyramid [SCHEMES!] Along The Way..."

"They make a goofy advertisement for some book or course that 'will help you get rich too!'"

"If they were actually rich, they would be on some tropical beach engaging in whatever vices they enjoy most-not hocking some get-rich-quick scheme."- illegalopinion3

All About The Simple Things...

"My dad's entire job is managing millionaire / billionaire philanthropy accounts, so I’ve grown up surrounded by some of the wealthiest people in the country."

"And I never knew until I got older how these 'Mr. Smith' and 'Ms. Jones' people that I’d grown up hanging out with were anything above upper middle class."

"Normal clothes, modest homes, very down to earth and funny people."

"Big wealth, and especially old wealth, is quiet wealth."- Travel_and_Tea·

Anything But Proud...

"I have a family member who insists she and her husband are upper middle class."

"She isn’t."

"She’s rich (8 figures), but it hurts her in some sort of primal way to acknowledge that."

"Her adult brother is also wealthy, although not as much as his sister."

"Likely also 8 figures."

"He insists he’s blue collar and middle class."

"There’s something in their upbringing that makes them ashamed of having 'made it' financially."- strangled_spaghetti

Blue Collar Work GIF by Pudgy PenguinsGiphy

People will try to come off as wealthier than they are for a multitude of reasons.

But just like any facade, keeping it up eventually becomes untenable.

This is why it's always most important to be grateful for the things you have, rather than flaunt what you wish you had.


silhouette photography of couple
Sean Stratton on Unsplash

When it comes to dating, I have my mental checklist. The guy must be kind, intelligent, funny, and a movie buff. He must be adventurous but also doesn't mind a Netflix and Chill date night.

Most of this is similar to the mental checklists other people have. Of course, I can be flexible. If someone is nice and I'm having fun with them, they don't necessarily have to check all the boxes.

However, I have one specific dating restriction that is a dealbreaker regardless of how many boxes the person checks, and that's religion. I've never been a fan, and now I'm an atheist, and I would want my partner to be as well. That's because I want kids, and the last thing I want is for us to argue about how to raise the kids when it comes to religion.

I'm not the only person who has one specific dating restriction. Everyone has that one thing that is a dealbreaker when it comes to a romantic relationship. Redditors certainly do, and they are ready to share.

It all started when Redditor AceofSpadesYT asked:

"What is your most specific restriction when it comes to dating?"

It's Just A Joke!

"No cruel or rude pranks."

– detective_kiara

"I saw a post by someone whose boyfriend "pranked" her by pretending to be dead on the kitchen floor. That is exactly how she had found her previous partner, dead on the kitchen floor, which her current boyfriend knew. He was surprised she dumped him and didn't think it was funny."

– innocuousspeculation

We're (Not) Gonna Party!

"No party people. Nothing wrong with it, I just ain't dealing with that sh*t."

– PlantBasedStangl

"True. I like planning weekend stuff, but it has to be something meaningful - visiting a different city, movie marathon, mountain hike, fancy lunch, all okay. But... clubbing and drinking? How f**king old are we, 19? No thank you, I'm old and have no energy for listening to music I don't like while being surrounded by 50 people that I don't give a single half of a sh*t about."

– PlantBasedStangl

LOL

"Same sense of humor. I have 0 interest sharing physical space with someone who doesn't laugh with me."

– Legendary_Lamb2020

My Ears Are Bleeding!

"I'm a light sleeper. I cannot date a snorer. I can hear snores through ear plugs AND a fan blowing. It's not you, it's me."

– YourLocalOrca

At that point, it does sound like them 😂

– CuriousRedditor98

Funemployed

"Have a f**king job."

– Cuss-Mustard

"Found this difficult when I was funemployed. Was fortunate enough to be able to live off savings for a bit."

"People reacted oddly to it. “But what do you do???”"

"Was dating at the same time and some girls had the same sentiment. “You don’t have a job?”"

"I had a good enough job that I didn’t need one anymore. And one lined up 8 months from then. But there were two girls specifically who treated it as a deal breaker."

– DigNitty

"I had a similar situation. I worked a high-paying job for a few years that demanded a ton of my time and had crazy hours. It burnt me out badly and I lived off of the savings from that job for a while and tried to date now that I actually had free time. I had more money in my bank account during that time than at any other point in my life but so many people were put off by me being funemployed and assumed I was looking to leech. But I guess there’s really no way to know someone's history and hard not to assume. Now I work full-time and have way less money overall but it looks better..."

– Pinsit

Just Breathe

"No smoking. Ever. I'm not kissing an ashtray, or smelling an ashtray. Instant turn off."

–fishfood19

"100% I broke up with an old gf because she started smoking behind my back knowing I’ve got asthma and it was always a hard pass. She thought I was joking but it showed me that she was also untrustworthy."

– Jonowl89

That'll Do It

"I guess my husband restricts my dating."

– HeinousEncephalon

"My wife has the same rule. But the jokes on her, I get around it by dating her!"

– AuralRapist

Prehistoric Love

"Must like dinosaurs."

– Grungeceratops

"That goes without saying."

– Plain_Chacalaca

What's In A Name?

"Cannot have the same name as any of my relatives."

– Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

"My last ex had the same name as my Dad and I reeeeeeaally didn't like it. So, fair."

– severaltalkingducks

Be Polite

"If they’re rude to people they’ll never see again (Waitstaff, cashiers, etc) I’m out."

"I can’t respect anyone who doesn’t respect themselves, and when you’re not polite to people you’re disrespecting yourself."

– OctopusCandleCompany

God Only Knows

"When I was dating, you had to be an atheist. I don't mess with religion. And I genuinely just don't think atheists + religious people work out."

"And I know... There's going to be someone who comments (assuming there are enough upvotes) who says "I worked out with my spouse who's religious and I'm not!" but you're the exception. When it comes to making decisions long-term, how to spend your money, where you think you'll go after you die, not to mention basic morality (!), and if you have children - that's a huge hurdle."

– Lulu_42

"We worked it out. It's absolutely an exception and not the rule. Don't do it if you can avoid it."

– Alcoraiden

Let's Move Tonight (Literally)

"They need to be ok with cold weather."

"I grew up in the north, live in the south, and I'm tolerating it until I can move back north. If someone says they hate the cold it's an instant turn-off because I don't want to drag someone into a climate they hate."

"The same thing also applies to walkability. I want to move somewhere walkable, and I hope to meet someone with that same goal rather than try to talk them into it."

– ThePresidentCantSwim

"Let me know when you find this mythical northern walkable community."

– Partner-Elijah

My Purr-fect Match

"Cat has to approve."

– Possible-Source-2454

Non-Negotiable

"They need to be male. Kind of important."

– RMHaney

"So weird, I want the complete opposite."

– eightvo

Yeah, the male thing is kind of important for me too!

Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comments.