Unfortunately, not everybody gets to keep all five senses throughout their lifetimes.
Some people will lose their sight, some their taste, some feeling in their fingers and toes. Still yet, some will lose their hearing. And after a lifetime of knowing what that is like, losing it can be devastating.
u/_jaysco_ asked:
Deaf people of reddit who used to be able to hear, what sounds do you miss the most?
Here were some of those answers.
Just People
Giphy
I'm losing my hearing slowly - right now I just miss when I didn't have to ask people to repeat themselves so often. And I'm sad that a lot of times if I can't make out what was said the third time I just give up and nod like I did.
Tweeting
Birds.
My cat meowing to be let in.
The kettle going off when its boiled.
Most music.
Being able to go to the movies.
One-Two Step
I'm deaf in my right ear though. I miss not having to do a weird twostep and dance around somebody to make sure I'm on the side I can hear them, and then explain to people who don't know why I want that side facing them. Or walking with my head turned so I can hear them whilst trying not to walk into anything. Worse when people try to whisper in my ear and I have to turn my head at close proximity and risk rubbing noses with them.
A Second Chance
I had hearing, then gradually lost it, and it was restored by a cochlear implant. So I got a second chance!
What I really missed was "normal" conversation. Being able to talk with someone without asking a zillion times what they said, or struggling to hear every other word and then put the parts together. Family dinners were really hard. I could hear the person across from me, but everything else was a blur. People would laugh and I wouldn't get the joke.
That's all changed!
Some of the more fun things I've rediscovered: my Maine Coon cats purring - very loud and quite often. The quiet rumble of distant thunder. My fridge has an alarm when the door is left open.
Grateful? Hell yeah.
Give And Take
I miss being able to hear my daughter's laugh.
I definitely don't miss the crying though.
Feeling Left Out
I went to watch Avengers End Game on the weekend, and I remember distinctly being able to hear less and less with every Marvel movie really. I genuinely heard about 10% of the entire movie dialogue. The cinema was laughing at scenes and I had no idea what happened. All the discussions everyone had after taught me more about the movie than what I had even watched. It was incredibly frustrating, about an hour in I just wanted to go home and cry from trying so hard to actively hear and not hearing anything at all, and it gets so emotionally draining like that most days, being with friends and not hearing anything or always having to ask to repeat and always just being behind and feeling stupid.
Don't ruin your hearing, it is an incredibly precious and fragile thing.
As We Go On
I'm slowly losing my hearing, I miss not having to hold the remote in my hand to turn up/down the volume while my SO is sleeping. When there's just talking I have to turn it up, then action scenes, music and background noise is too loud so I have to turn it back down. I turned the subtitles on a few months ago and it's changed my life!
I miss not having to say "I can't hear you, you need to yell at me". Like when I'm doing dishes, I can't hear someone who's standing next to me talking normally.
My miss the feeling of clear ears. Mine constantly feel like I need to pop them. Luckily I live on a mountain so once in a while when I'm going down the mountain one of my ears will give a good pop and feels better for a little while.
I miss not hearing my voice echoed in my head. If you don't know what I mean, put your fingers in your ears and talk.
It's all around sh*tty, but I've accepted my fate.
A Far-A-Way Talk
I can sorta still hear (Cochlear) but I lost my hearing back when I was 5...in 1986. I remember talking on the landline phones at the time and while I could clearly hear the person, they sounded far away. That's what I remember. I wonder if landline phones sound like that today still.
Lost My Balance
My mom has sudden neural sensory hearing loss in both ears. Luckily the cochlear implants worked. However, music does not sound the same at all. She loves live music and always played CDs at home. She is very sad about how music sounds. She can only listen to music she knows because her brain sort of fills in the gaps. But any new music just sounds weird to her. Losing her hearing changed her life. Coincidentally, since hearing loss is an inner ear problem, she doesn't drink anymore. She says it already feels like she's had a margarita, 24/7.
Back To The Birds
Giphy
Not deaf but hearing-impaired. I love walking in the woods, and greatly miss the sound of birds chirping. The woods used to sound full of life. Now I can't hear them at all for the most part, and just listen to one of those "Sounds of Nature" CD's of bird song at high volume.
Scientists are about to start testing a drug that has successfully regrown ear hair cells in mice, so I'm hopeful that 10 years from now that I'll be able to hear again.
Our resumes can be an asset to separate us from the competition - but if we really want to stand out, why not include unique personal accomplishments? Beat a tough video game? Add it. Turned in a lost item to its owner even though you wanted to keep it? Throw it on there. Are you funny? Make your interviewer laugh, it can't hurt, right?
Shore20 asked professionals of Reddit: What's one thing you're deeply proud of — but would never put on your résumé?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Petty Warcraft revenge.
In World of Warcraft I was attempting to kill this elite rare spawn. It was reasonably difficult to do solo and would take several minutes to get done. While I was about 3/4 the way through killing it, three other players showed up, killed me, and stole the rare spawn kill. A little bit later, the rare spawn was up again and I saw those same three people killing it. I ran in and killed all three of them and stole my rare spawn kill back from them, ending the whole ordeal with just a few percent of my health left. It didn't drop anything great, but it was so satisfying.
Is there a slot for honesty?
Once in elementary school, lunch was ending and I found a perfect condition Blue Eyes White Dragon on the ground. Hellll yeah. I picked that sh*t up and walked towards my class as rain was beginning to fall.
Thats when I turn the corner to see a kid panicking and crying, running around feverishly. I asked him what was wrong and he said he lost his Blue Eyes White Dragon... It took a lot of willpower to give it up (my parents couldnt afford to buy me booster packs or anything), but I did give it back to him then and there. I look back on it fondly now, it helps when I feel like a waste of air.
It's what Yugi would have done
You're not a waste of air, my dude.
I can barely clip my cats' nails but okay.
I got a call from a friend who also raised goats, she had a 5 month old who had a bum leg and the older kids were picking on her. I picked her up, but it was the start of a long weekend and every vet was closed for the next several days.
Turns out, she had broken her hind leg, about 3" above her ankle. Clean break, no broken skin.
I set it, then splinted it with a soda bottle cut so it would roll on itself. Wrapped it in vet wrap, planning to stabalize it through the weekend.
Couldnt get an appointment until a week later, where an xray showed that the leg was healing perfectly.
I feel like you could use that for a "how do you respond during stress" or "a time you've gone above and beyond" type interview question.
Lettuce discuss your qualifications.
Ate a whole head of iceberg lettuce in under 11 minutes. Most of my friends didn't even finish but I'm the Lettuce King.
There actually is a lettuce club at my University where during each annual meeting there's a competition to see who can eat a head of lettuce the fastest. Whoever wins is crowned the lettuce king.
Edit: Apparently there are many other universities that do this.shortsonapanda
"Lettuce hold a meeting next year."
Now, lettuce pray.
That's a lot of blood.
I've donated over 10 gallons of blood to the Red Cross. I actually had it on my resume for a while but some people get really weird about it.
Depends whether or not it was your blood
You donate one pint, you're a hero. You donate 10 gallons and everybody starts asking whose blood this is.
Geometry was the devil.
Not sure if this belongs here, but I'm real proud of an accomplishment I had in 10th grade (a little over a decade ago, now). I was taking a regular Geometry class and we were given our mid-term. I got through it quickly, but there was a bonus question on the back. I'm not sure how much it was worth, but the question was basically this:
Here's an extremely abstract object. Find its area. Oh yeah, not telling you the length of any of its sides. Have fun.
I spent about an hour on this one question. Now mind you, it was multiple choice, so I could've guessed and had a 25% chance. But nah, I wanted to crack it! So I brought out my ruler, drew dotted lines, etc, and got to the answer.
When the teacher gave back out tests, he asked those who got the bonus question right to raise their hands. He then asked those who actually worked out the problem to keep their hands raised, and the rest were to lower theirs. I was the only one who still had their hand raised.
Teacher: "I gave this question to all of my classes, including my Honors students. Out of them all, dmxell is the only one who correctly worked out the problem. Dmxell, can you please come to the board and show everyone how to do it."
After I copied my work to the board, my teacher followed up with: "He's right."
Boom. This made my school year. But obviously I'd never put it on a resume, lol.
I was on the math team in high school. The first meet, I took the geometry test. There was this triangle, with criss-cross lines that were all congruent. I had to find the measure of angle a.
I took my pencil, and turned it around on the paper following the lines. I counted 7 angles, and the pencil ended turned around (180 degrees). My answer was 25.714 degrees.
At the end of the tests, we could take our scratch paper with (everyone took the tests asy the same time, so cheating wasn't an issue). My classmates saw my paper and laughed in my face. I was the only one (150 people) who got it right.
Edit: the problem: https://imgur.com/gallery/L8sx8EF
AB=BC=CD=DE=EF=FG=AG (technically congruent, but can't symbol that properly) Find the measure of angle A.
Definitely worth putting on a resume.
I'm fantastic at making balloon animals. I've got no good reason to be good at it.
It would look great on your resume if you were to work as a child entertainer.
Unfortunately I'm an aspiring software engineer so I don't think it'll make the cut for a while. Maybe some day for sh*ts I'll toss "is able to make a balloon bicycle" on my CV.
Actually, this is quite a feat.
I have over 11 1/2 years clean and sober. It's a good thing but I'm not telling potential employers about it.
Congrats! I'm 11 years sober myself. It is quite the accomplishment!
Worth it.
I ate 6 bowls of pasta at the pasta deathmatch challenge AKA the Olive Garden never ending pasta bowl.
Congratulations! Your award is indigestion!
I didn't poo for almost three days.
There's a story.
I was once called "inconsiderate" by a serial killer.
You can't leave us hanging like that -story time.
Back in 2008, I was a news photographer for a local CBS station. We were doing a story on a lady known regionally as "The Black Widow" - every husband she'd ever had mysteriously wound up dead, and she'd collected some 3 or 4 massive life insurance payouts over the course of her life. She had finally been caught and was appearing before an official in the local prison - it was some kind of small hearing in a tiny room, but I don't know the exact details. I had my camera on her with the top light turned on, and she kept putting her hand up in front of her face to block my shot. I'd turn it off, she'd put it down. Turn it back on, hand went up. I soon realized we're not going to have a single usable shot of this lady in our story that evening because the hearing was going to be over in no time, so I turned the camera on to record her, but shut the top light off. This made the shot a bit darker than I wanted, but it fooled her - she put her hand down and I got plenty of video of her. But not before she looked right in my camera lens, gave me a glare, and said, "You are very inconsiderate." Part of me wanted to ask her where "video taping a criminal" fell on the scale relative to "murdering a bunch of husbands," but I held my tongue.
It's Neo-Noir time. Let's strap into the back of a PI's car and follow them around on some cases!
u/Xenasty asked:
Private detectives of reddit, what is the most interesting case you ever solved?
Here were some of the coolest cases.
Backting
So I work for a company that investigates what look like insurance fraud. So someone has some type of accident and are saying that they can't work ect.
So we have this case where a man is saying his back is terrible. Like he can hardly walk, can't work at all, needs constant assistance for everyday life.
So we get an investigator to provide footage of them going around their everyday life, pretty normal thing for us to do.
So I pop this DVD in my computer and start to watch, he's walking, bending, twisting. All things that make it look like he isn't injured but then he does one thing that makes his claim fall in the toilet and flush itself down.
He did a backflip. He stood on a bench at a park and flipped off. Needless to say after we showed him the footage he withdrew his claim.
Movie Plot
I'm a PI
Been one for a long time. I gotta say that most cases I work on are pretty boring. The job is full of mild "gotcha" moments, but they're a product of long lonely hours on surveillance just to get a guy shovelling some dirt while collecting injury compensation benefits. A PI's greatest tools in the universe are Google and a telephone. I can call and ask anyone anything under the guise of anything I want. I even call the people I'm investigating sometimes or correspond via email when I need answers or information. It's ridiculous the amount of information people volunteer about themselves after some good natured banter.
Also, I'm sure most of you know this trick. But you really can go anywhere with a clipboard, high viz vest, and a hard hat.
The BEST case I was part of involved a security guard my firm hired to do night watch on an electronics store. I was part of a small firm that, at the time, provided security guards and private investigators. One night we get a call from the guard. He'd had the sh*t kicked out of him, been tied to chair, escaped, and called the cops and the office to report a robbery at the store. Three attackers managed to pry the back door open and subdue the guard and proceed to rob the place of about a 100k. The guard told a compelling story and looked like sh*t.
It took the police all of two days to track down the stolen sh*t. The thieves weren't being very careful when it came to offloading the goods. The thieves turned out to be the guard's brother and cousins and it was our guards brilliant idea for them to come and rob the place and make it look like an armed robbery. What a g*ddamn idiot. We still laugh about it.
It must have been one of those thoughts that sounded brilliant and sophisticated in his own head, only to have the epiphany that it was moronic hit him with same Mack Truck like intensity a little later on.
It was unusual to have such a dumb movie heist plot happen with people I worked with.
Thankfully Low End
I wasn't a detective, but I worked as a Skip Tracer for a credit card bank back in the early 2000s.
I was a bill collector, basically, but because of my ability to track people down who had "skipped out" on their debts, I was put on a "task force" to go after accounts that exclusively had zero contact information.
My favorite one was when I tracked down a guy in the middle of South America doing his religious mission. He had access to a phone literally one hour of one day a week. My job was to call around and get information on how to reach him -- at the time I was in my early 20s, and as long as I didn't break FDCPA, the bank let me do my thing.
When I got the guy on the phone he was flabbergasted that I was able to track him down and he wanted to know how, so I told him.
I called his mom, who told me about the mission he was on. Then, when I called again, instead of asking which church he was through, I had instead found a local church and said, "Oh, he went down there through [SUCH AND SUCH] church, right?"
Oh no, not that one. It was [OTHER CHURCH]. "OH OF COURSE! [OTHER CHURCH]! That was with pastor Smith! No? Oh, Pastor Davis!"
Then, called [OTHER CHURCH] and asked for Pastor Davis. Explained that I had just talked to his mom and she suggested I talk to him in order to get a phone number. Pastor Davis supplied me with the phone number and the day and hour that the debtor would be there.
It took me a couple of tries, but I eventually got him on the phone. He gave me permission to talk to his parents regarding the debt, I called them, explained what was up, and they worked out a payment arrangement.
I think he owed less than $10k to the bank, which was on the low-end of accounts that I worked.
Staring
I've been a PI for almost a year now. The job is definitely not as exciting as most people think. Some days it's busy and stressful, but a ton of it is just sitting and waiting. When people ask what's it like I tell them, "stare at something for 6-10 hours. That's your job most days".
Anyways as for the most interesting case, we don't necessarily "solve" but rather provide evidence. Most cases are workers comp or liability but we do have domestic (think cheating spouse etc.) Cases about 2-5 a month. I personally have been involved in undercover work buying illegal cell phones that my company gives me 5k - 10k cash to buy that have gone to court and testified afterwards. My all time favorite case involved me following a guy with a boat to a marina. He got on his boat and set out. Our client authorized getting footage by any means necessary. That means my company allowed me to rent a jet ski for 6 hours to watch him fish. After about an hour he left the "zone" I was required to stay in so for the next 5 hours I jet skied then fished on the docks all while getting paid.
If anyone wants to know more feel free to ask.
Bonus
I thought of another experience that always stuck with me from my PI days-
I was tasked with doing surveillance on a wealthy geologist, who was in a very minor car accident but was collecting $5k+ month from the insurance company in lost wages because she supposedly couldn't work.
These cases were my specialty and I almost always got my person using my shady tactics. In this case the subject was a 60+yr old Chinese woman. The footage that helps me "win" these cases, is catching people doing physical labor, like yard work, as proof they are capable of working.
I thought this old lady would be hard to bust, but in the first hour she carried huge garbage bags of cans and bottles to the recycle depot, loaded about 20 large phone books into her trunk, took out the trash which looked heavy as hell, then went to a hair salon and was tossing her head all around (she claimed neck injury) to show the haircut she wanted. One hour of surveillance (some people take months!) and she was done! No shady tactics required. The insurance company should've given a bonus for that one...
Not Just Cheating--SUPER Cheating
A young individual once hired me to investigate whether his wife was cheating. Needed the evidence in court for when he files for divorce. His wife and his sister-in-law were going to have a get together that weekend and my client wanted me to tail them. So I set up my dash cam to live stream my video feed to the client and start following his wife. Turns out his wife and sister in law were both heading to a hotel for a foursome. Got some pretty solid video and photo evidence for my client, who then confronted his wife later that night. She tried to deny it and said she only met up with some guy for kisses and touched his family jewels a little bit.
Set Up Two People
More of a casual couch investigation than anything.
I once received a text from an unknown number regarding a class project they were working on. Clearly they had thought I was someone else, but I thought I'd have fun with it like I normally do with wrong numbers.
Based on their area code and the name of the school building they had mentioned, I was able to identify the college. I then asked them what email address of mine I had given them, which supplied me with a name.
I used the name and college to track down the real person on Facebook they were trying to contact and that gave me a wealth of information.
I didn't let it play out too long because I didn't want to actually screw up any assignment, but it did seem like there may have been some chemistry between these two.
I never ended up confessing and just told the girl to contact me solely through email, so I sometimes wonder what ended up happening.
Wedding Bell Dues
Not a PI, but my husband is not on FB. He's introverted and did not keep in touch with any of his friends. It was important for me that he invite some to our wedding. He said he didn't know how to get in touch with them. He knew his 4 college roommates names. A few were on FB and I was able to friend them to get their addresses. The last one was not, and the other roomies hadn't been in touch with him either.
All my husband knew was a name (common) and "i think he lived in Lancaster PA". I couldn't find him off that on FB, so I ran a background check on him. It was around $25. Report had his mom's name on it. I fb stalk her, searched her friends with the same last name, and found a young lady. Fb message the girl asking if she is related the roomie and she was his sister who gave me his address. I felt pretty proud that I was able to track him down. And yes, he attended the wedding!
Not A Forensic Expert
Private Eye here. We usually get hired to document someone's day. We try and gather as much info on them and get as much video of them in public as possible, without losing them or getting caught onto. Not all of it is workman's comp, but usually along the lines of someone making a claim and we go out and see what their activity level is like.
We're not out to "catch" anyone, just obtain video and facts.
We may watch someone to make sure they are getting specific care during specific times and things like that. A lot of people do have certain restrictions, which they are always breaking.
I've been doing it 10 years and i don't know if everyone is full of sh*t, or they just give us the cases where they think there's some f*ckery afoot, but most of them are doing things they shouldn't be doing and we get it all on video. However, the clients don't even read the reports, and we rarely go to court.
The Case Of The Sketchy Day Care
Not a PI but want to be after this: I'm a single mom of two toddler boys. Their dad moved out of town forcing me to put them in daycare which I tried to avoid at all costs. Since I am a single mom I qualified for a program that pays for the care. Its a county program. I was to find the daycare, put them in contact with the program, the program's provider services are then to do background and licensing checks, etc, before they approve the care. 2 months into using this daycare service, I pick up my boys after work and my 1 year old has clear handprints and bruises on both sides of his face, bruised ears, lump on the back of his head and a cut.
She kept telling me that he ran into a sliding glass door... I took him straight to the ER, called social services and the police. The next day I take him to his doctor and the abuse center for evaluations. Their official diagnosis was that we was "repeatedly slapped and choked by an adult". Days pass with no call from the police, no calls from cps, and nothing from licensing. So I start to call around myself. CPS dropped the case as it did not happen at home and licensing was never forwarded the report. The police told me it would be a while before someone gets to my case. So I do my own due diligence for my son.
I file the report myself with licensing and when they asked for her name I give it to them.....but they have no one by that name in her system. I give them the address of the daycare.....not in their system. I'm beyond confused as I KNOW she is a licensed daycare facility because she was approved for use by the county. I call the county program and cut off the care and said while I am at it, could they provide me with the license number they have on file for her as well as the address she provided them with. They give me the license and a different address than the one I have been taking my son to. I call back Licensing and they put in the license number and it is not registered to her, but to her sister. Someone I have never met before.
The address they have on file for that license is the same address she provided to the county program. This is illegal and fraud. I ask them how I can get copies of records on this license number and it turns out there is a website that will provide all information in the last 4 years attached to the license. So I start digging. She was on the license at one point, before being removed in OCT 2017. She had 3 cases of abuse that were all dropped, and was finally removed last OCT when a baby died in her care!
I call police and they still tell me to wait! I am furious as to how this could all be missed. I continue to dig and do an online search of the license number. Multiple ads pop up. There are at least three daycares and three different addresses using this one license number (license for family daycares are for 1 address and persons named on license only) All sisters. So after three days I take to facebook and post the photos and my rant and they go viral! The police station called me the next morning! Different detective different station. The people made such a fuss and called so many times that they found someone to handle the case immediately. I handed them everything I found and said " this should save you some work".
During the investigation they ended up finding things that got the FBI involved. They put surveillance her house and saw things that led to a raid. They found lots of guns and drugs and arrested her husband (Which I was under the impression she did not have!) and seized their cars and phones and intercepted all mail. All of this while she is still running her daycare and being fined a few hundred every day she is opened. She didn't have a care in the world.
They arrested her yesterday for 3 felonies! With fighting this we have been able to reopen other cases dropped and get justice for 2 other babies as well! Her bail is set for $200,000 but her husbands was much higher and she bailed him out instantly. Guess you can afford it when you run a drug business and a daycare at once!
Being a consumer can be a stressful situation. It's always fun to shop and splurge on yourself with treats now and again. But the treats half the time can turn out to be lemon. And not the fresh citrus kind. You never know if a certain product is overhyped or if that used item maybe just a little more used than you hoping for. One of the most frustrating parts of shopping is having to cause a scene in the return line. Those people are always a trip.
Redditor u/nachtstiel wanted consumers to share... What is something that you are NEVER F**KING BUYING AGAIN?
Keep your mitts to yourself...
Oven mitt from the Dollar store. I don't know how, but I think it actually intensified the heat. rayrayrayray
A lot has to do with the seams on those imo. My mother has the ones the open like a sock puppet, so a flat piece of fabric the spans the entire gripping surface of your hand.
The dollar store ones are usually two pieces of fabric cut into a mitten shape and sewn together. And the seam is right along your hand. And the heat travels right in. And it's awful. ASpoonfullOfSass
Education ain't cheap.
A parking pass for college. When I did my generals at the local CC it was only 40 bucks a year. At the university I'm transferring to they want 200 dollars a year.
My student ID lets me ride the bus for free and I can find free parking about ten minutes away from campus. ZeD00m
My parking for both semesters is $700, my friends at a UC would have to pay almost a grand. It's real BS! Ironfist506
This is Serious...
Sirius XM radio subscription. It's a great service, but they will spam the everloving F**K out of your inbox, even if you've opted out of everything and unsubscribed from every available option. I'm talking multiple emails a day. "DON'T MISS OUT!"
Also, good luck canceling service, which I did just because of the email issue. Their retention people are absolutely relentless. LecherousHomewrecker
Just use a towel...
A cat bed. I can use a box from an Amazon package and get much better results. achung101
I have a constantly-changing cat bed. Every time I get a new order, the old cat bed gets recycled and the brand new luxury cat bed is unveiled, often with packing materials still inside. It's fun because it can go from tiny almost-can't-fit-inside, to like mini fridge size. We have a lot of fun at my house, me and my cat. miniconmax
Buy Used...
I will never buy the first year run of a new model of car. I will make sure the model has had a few years to work the kinks out.
In case anyone was wondering, I bought my wife a Chevy Sonic when they first came out. So many little things have broken in that car. Mostly small inconvenient stuff, but some not so small. The worst was a crack in the air intake hose that was very hard to find. Its also obviously leaking coolant, yet nobody can find the leak. So many small electronic things having to be replaced.
I've always found my Chevy vehicles to be very reliable, but not this one. Never again. PsychoWyrm
Seriously?
X-ray glasses. Purchased them from the back of a comic book years ago. rva_musashi
I actually had a pair at one point. There's actually a gimmick in them (no, they aren't really x-rays) so it's not like a total loss. There's a piece of dyed red feather in each eye hole. You can see through them, but it diffracts the light coming to each eye. The effect is that it looks like your hands have see-through flesh and solid bones (because the two images don't quite line up). sigilvii
Don't be that cheap!
Bargain Q-Tips. fwoggyboboggy
That feeling when you pull the Q-Tip out and it no longer has the cotton on it. kai-klee
Oh hell no! go_commit_die_
Don't get sunk...
A cabin cruiser.
I was told before I bought my boat that the happiest days I would have with it would be the day I bought it and the day I sold it. I did not think this could possibly be true.
I was wrong. elizabethfarias
My fiancée wants a boat. I want a friend with a boat. She is not demanding a boat, she just said it would be nice to have one someday. I reminded her that we have friends with a boat who rarely use it and sink lots of money into it. RIPKellys
Not today Satan!
A furby. When they were popular I made the mistake of asking for one from everyone (my mom, godmother, dad, friend-that was everyone)... and I was shocked when everyone bought me one. In the middle of the night they would be awake plotting and talking to each other in their furby language. Nightmares. Never again. AsianGinger33
You get what you pay for...
Furniture from a discount furniture store. The wood is so soft that I got several splinters from accidentally scraping my thumbnail on it. And my bed frame was not meant to be taken back apart at all. I'm surprised it survived the move, but it's definitely not making it through another.
Faith is an important part of life. Faith in oneself, in people and in God gives you hope that we're not all alone and that we're more capable than we initially give ourselves credit for. For many people the main source of faith is housed in the church.
And for some faith has been hijacked by predators and those who only know how to espouse judgement. This has led to a lot of issues with communities and their connections to religion.
Redditor u/everyone-hates-me wanted the freed to open up and discuss, asking... Formerly religious people, what was your breaking point?
Fahrenheit 451 anyone?
I was a Christian, but my church got to the point where they were banning tons of media (secular music, the news, certain books, wanted censoring chips in TVs, parental controls on the computer for adults) and then they started telling us that we needed to abandon/leave our secular friends and family (even Christians of different denominations) and only be friends with the members of the church/youth group.
At the same time they were saying that we were in the final years before the rapture/return of Christ and it would be best if we didn't go to college or have kids, due to the hardships it would bring. The youth pastor proceeded to have children and the regular pastor sent his grandchildren to college that year.
The red flags turned crimson. TitanicBead
No Pizza? No church!
I churched so hard in high school. So much so that in college I got invited to a dinner with my college Catholic priest. At dinner I said, "I love pizza!" He said, "You can only love God and people."
I mean I was already upset with broad, seemingly meaningless rituals, but that was the boiling point.
It kind of seems like the priest was power tripping and making up stupid rules.
My dad (not a priest, just very religious when he feels like it) did the same thing. We couldn't say "girls rule" because only God the king can rule. It wasn't just dumb, it was objectively false. realhorrorsh0w
You are enough!
Striving so hard to be as good of a person as I could be but still being told I'd go to hell for certain aspects of myself or beliefs I held. Yet watching others carelessly do rotten things to others and going to confess their sins and feeling like they had the right to continue to be bad people or to act holier than thou. Finally realizing I didn't need a religion to be a decent human being or all the guilt that was put on me. faux--username
I got God.
I was raised Christian, but late in high school, I couldn't get it out of my head that good people I knew and friends I had that weren't Christian were supposedly going to hell. Be that Muslim friends, Jewish, agnostic, atheist, non-religious, etc. I had pretty much the gamut of religious beliefs among my friends, and I just found it hard to believe these people would be punished for how they were raised.
I'm not anti-religious. Religion is very cultural, and I think it's messed up to bag on people's culture. But someone's religion usually boils down to where they were raised and by whom they were raised. And I can't accept that people are judged based on these qualifications, in any religion.
For a while, I reconciled this by saying that being a Christian wasn't necessarily about announcing you're a Christian, and that accepting Jesus can also mean living a life like Jesus even if you're not consciously doing that, or not doing that in the name of God. But that's not what the Bible says, and it's not what the church believes, so I've moved away from that.
Now I'm kinda a universalist, agnostic or something. I don't really care if there is an afterlife or a God. If there is, then the God will reward those who were good people in this life, regardless of religion. If that God doesn't do that, I'm not particularly interested in worshiping him or his afterlife. Stinduh
Not Guilty!
I was raised by guilt. I finally got to the point where I refused to feel guilty for every little thing I did. cdplater
I can get that. The bible actually sets you up to fail. It's impossible to be sinless. You just have to have a church that goes, "well. We're sinners. It's a good thing Jesus loves us all the same." lucak98
Santa Forever!
I was already questioning pretty heavily, but for whatever reason one of my friends comparing Santa to God was the breaking point. He said "When we talk about Santa as an all knowing being who rewards good behavior and punishes bad its a ridiculous fairy tale, but when we talk about God in that context we're just supposed to believe it blindly." Frotodile
God isn't perfect...
I was told that God would help you. If you prayed to God he would give you strength. He would help bad things become fixed etc...
I lost my religion when, at 7 years old, after years of praying and fully believing God would help, I still had to watch my alcoholic father beat my alcoholic mother up almost nightly. It was one night while I was picking glass shards out of her hair that I realized that if there were a God he didn't care enough to make things change... and honesty the idea of a cruel, uncaring God scared me more than the alternative so I decided to believe instead that there was no God.
Things are finally better now after years and years of pain and suffering in my family... and it still wasn't God who fixed it. tinylottie
But the Bible...
It was years and years of asking questions that apparently didn't have answers besides "...but the Bible says", but specifically the final straw was praying that my sick and dying grandfather would pass quickly and painlessly, instead of the three weeks he spent after that vomiting up his own stomach bile and starving because he couldn't eat before the cancer took him.
I never asked for anything remotely self serving or personal because I always thought that was wrong, but this one instance I begged and pleaded for help, not even for me but for my dying grandfather, and instead it was almost like someone playing 'corrupt-a-wish' on a message board.
It wasn't even a matter of believing or not believing, I just didn't and couldn't pray anymore after that. I was almost afraid to ask for anything else. DMan304
Now that's not Christian behavior!
A pastor called my mother a whore. AgentDaleBCooper
In the baptist church I grew up in, I remember the adults nearly gasping when a woman member came wearing gasp JEANS. She had brought breakfast out to her husband who was working in the fields combining corn that morning, and went straight to church from the field. It was a wet year and harvest was getting late, they could only combine when the ground was frozen so many farmers were combining all night. They ended up having a meeting between the pastor, deacons, and the husband.
Looking back this infuriates me on so many levels. The guy was working on Sunday, but nothing was said about that. His wife could have skipped church all together but elected to come. So the man in the house can bend some rules and skip church, but for his wife to go out of her way when very busy to even make it to church, just in the wrong clothes was enough to have a meeting with the husband about how his wife should appear. It just makes my blood boil. yeah_sure_youbetcha
Worry about your own self Sir!
I'm agnostic but I stopped going to church once my pastor berated me for doing teenager things like getting a haircut and piercing my ears. He told me that that's what witches did when mourning their lost loved ones and handed me a conveniently provided information packet. He also had some hypocritical stuff to say during the bible study so I'm glad I never had to go again. Religion never really clicked with me but he was what made me hate christianity the most. tangledlettuce
No reading between the lines...
For me, it was seeing people misinterpret their own religious texts. Terrorists are prime examples of it. Also seeing how irrational people were being, following a religion. Riots, public parades, blockades... All for a god that others don't even believe in. Keeping the property and financial losses aside, this is probably why religious leaders are so successful. A mini government, in which their subjects have complete trust in. Manipulate them at your convenience, and get the work done
Ps: Maybe I'm not formerly religious. I used to go to gatherings because I was forced to, and couldn't understand anything. lestrenched
Bless you Father...
My grandmother asked our local priest for a blessing for my (low-functioning) autistic brother, to which the priest replied:
"I'll bless him with a brick." nicrotex
Did this really happen? Please tell me this s**thead never walked the earth. FrikkinLazer
SO many books...
I read 300 books
Note: Any books will do. Just read a bunch of them. Get some outside perspective and some conflicting points of view. Done. woodentraveler
Well yeah, because if someone only reads one book, it's pretty easy to guess what book it is. Hugo_5t1gl1tz
The church has no real room for actual discussion outside of cliche answers. AdouMusou
Eyes Wide Unshut!
I was a Jehovah's Witness. I took a break and left for a few years. When I attempted to come back the time off really opened my eyes at the control they try to exert over every aspect of your life. That's when I opened my mind that they weren't the one and true religion. Then it became obvious the horrible things they are guilty of. Then became disheartened with all religion since they all use guilt, shame, and fear to control their members for money and power. Then I realized the bible is utterly ridiculous and that if I were to believe the bible, that God is a total a**hole. Elbiotcho
Staying Angry....
Praying for many months and begging for things to get better while also getting bullied way more and finally falling into depression. I guess the anger made me start questioning everything, and religion is pretty easy to break with logic. Szarra
When I realized that God has never faith-healed an amputee, in any religion. AnticipatingLunch
Who's Plan?
Watching my primary guardian die of cancer over 4 years of my late child early teen life and constantly being told that it was God's plan that she was dying a slow and painful death while also being killed by her chemotherapy. If it was God's plan to kill the closest thing I have to a parent when I was 14, then I would rather burn in his hell than live in his heaven. animekid117
Simple Logic...
Not to be too cliché, but science and logic just won out over "big sky man get mad." SarahIsTrans
Yeah, me too. I wasn't raised religious. When I started thinking about religion it confused me that people would take it seriously and believe it was all true. It was all much too fairy tale for me. I tried my best to understand it and understand faith but it just would not compute. I think some people just have faith and others do not. I am comfortable not having faith and wouldn't change a thing about myself. starlit_moon
Hey Lazarus....
I was raised Christian. I believed the Bible and I believed in miracles and I really absolutely believed. But I was a bit of an optimist, so while I believed non Christians went to hell I figured God loves everyone, he'll give them time to find him.
Then I got a phone call that my non Christian friend died. And I knelt on the floor and I prayed, in tongues even. And I prayed that if Jesus could bring Lazarus back to life he could give my friend another chance. That I would die in her place, I'd go to heaven so surely it would be better that way. And I knelt and I sobbed and I prayed to die for hours. And I was so sure, I mean God loved her right, this was the perfect answer?
Shockingly enough my friend did not magically come back to life. I didn't lose my faith all in one go. I tried to find justifications but I just couldn't anymore. So now I just love my friends as much as I can while I'm alive and if I go to hell when I die at least I'll be in good company. Bunny36
Nothing left to give...
In Christianity, you're expected to "give up" a lot: money, time, whatever. However, I don't have the will or the energy to give any of my time to my faith. I'm a senior in high school and these past few years have been utter crap. I don't do anything except go to school, study, and do my extracurriculars. I'm also applying to colleges, which is a whole other ball game. I'm so very very tired and I know it's only going to get harder from here. Still, I'm already drained. I don't have time for myself. I haven't seen some of my friends so far this school year, because we're all busy and we can't meet up. I now have sciatica because all I do is sit and stare at homework for hours on end. Sometimes, I can't get out of my damn bed. And for God's sake, I'm a 17-year-old girl who doesn't know how to drive or even apply makeup, because I don't have time to learn these skills. That being said, if I had a little bit of free time to myself on a Sunday morning, I most certainly would NOT go to Church- voluntarily of course. I'm expected to go and sit through the same lengthy liturgy, which bores me to tears. Why should I give up what little to no time I have left for myself for others? I don't want to sound selfish or bratty, but I'm damn frustrated. I've become a recluse because of my studies, and if I'm expected to give up even more, then I want out. sweet_autumn_goat
The Rainbow Bridge outta here!
Oof, I have a lot of feelings about religion.
I was Christian until I was 16 years old. I had gone to Christian schools, went to church camps, etc. The bible didn't make a ton of sense, but I reasoned that it was all parables and metaphors.
And then my cat died, and now I was a shy, quiet girl and this cat was my very best friend, and he died. I was crying to a church counselor that at least my cat would be there waiting for me in heaven. And they told me no, that wasn't true, animals don't have souls. They're essentially meat robots put on earth for humans to do with as they wish, and they don't matter, that the rainbow bridge is fake.
That was literally the very last straw, and I was done. No way you can share your life with an animal and love it, and believe that if you can believe every other weird, horrible thing in that book.
As I've aged, my dislike for religion has only grown. I truly cannot stand how women and marginalized groups are treated across many different religions. It disgusts me, and I do not trust people who have found faith later in life. I understand being brainwashed as a child, it happened to me. I do not understand embracing those beliefs as an adult. onequestionisall